23 28 Things I Really Wish I Did or Didn't Do in My 20's
(and What Might Have Been...)
updated November 1: social media shares/url was reset, no comments were lost - I will reply to comments when I get a chance. Thanks for reading!
The past couple months have been busy (I have some surprises for you soon, I'm the owner of 2 other new businesses), it's been a while since I published a discussion on Good Looking Loser, so I'm going to try and make this one count.
In December of 2013, I published a popular series called "30 Things I Wish I Knew in My Early 20's" on Lifestyle by Good Looking Loser. The series details a list of unique insights that I learned in my 20's - most of which I learned on my own and many of which would have greatly accelerated my transition from an isolated insecure bodybuilder without a sex life to a confident douchebag with more options than I ever thought possible.
This discussion, "20 Things I Wish I Did or Didn't Do In My 20's", is going to focus on actions that I wish I took (or didn't take) rather than insights I wish I knew.
There is a lot I left on the table in my 20's.
You will never fully understand how big of an underachiever I really was.
These days, life is good though. It would be ridiculous to complain.
If it wasn't - I would have plenty of regrets.
I'm 33, had quite an end to my 20's, have an apartment/house in 2 different cities, 5 different businesses, don't have to work ever again, have a hot supportive girlfriend, unlimited supply of Kratom and most importantly - I never have to do anything I don't want.
I'm even somehow getting SlingTV for free even though my free trial has expired.
All that "stuff" that I had to experience in my 20's on my own is the reason why.
All the good and bad decisions I made in my 20's paid off.
But I want you to get the most out of your 20's than I did and not be forced try make up for lost time.
Your 20's is a special decade when you have the energy, desire, time and permission to do a lot of stuff that would just be weird in later in life.
Hopefully you realize this now and not in 10 years.
Let's discuss some of the stuff I should have done in my 20's and how it may have shifted the direction of my life. As I will explain, many of these, for one reason or another, were not possible or practical at the time for me - but are worth your consideration.
These are in no particular order.
#1 I Wish I Had Gone to the University of Florida When I Was 18
(Instead of Transferring 5 Times)
Between 2001 and 2006, I went to 7 different colleges (full-time at 5 schools) and I eventually graduated Magna Cum Laude from the University of Florida in the Spring of 2006.
Ironically, in 2001, when I was applying to colleges as a high school senior, Florida offered me a full scholarship which I passed up on. Instead, I received early-decision acceptance (binding, I had to go) from Emory University in Atlanta.
The one and only reason that I went to Emory was because of its top 20 ranking in US News. It was the most prestigious school I got into and everyone thought going was a 'no-brainer' since I wasn't quite Ivy League material (3.71gpa, only top 20% SAT). Where I'm from, the "best college" to go to is the most academically prestigious institution that grants you acceptance.
Arguably, my decision to go to Emory started the downward spiral that became my early and mid 20's.
Within 3 months, I was miserable and wanted to leave Emory and go to a 'real college' that had prettier girls and a better social scene.
(I honestly left Emory because I felt I was too good for the girls and that the guys were nerds)
After 1 semester at Emory I transferred to the University of Maryland just so I could go home and figure out where my next stop would be.
Leaving Emory, at the time, was good for my emotional health but it largely spelled the end of my chance to have a good social (and sex) life in college. For the next 5 years, at multiple colleges, I would always be "the transfer student" who was trying to break into established social circles that were largely closed.
When I finally got to Florida in the Fall of 2004, I realized that I should have gone there in the first place and my college experience would have been totally different if I had. I wouldn't have had the long sexless streak that covered almost 2 years (in a long-distance relationship with a prude girl) and I wouldn't have spent most of my Saturday nights sitting in my room alone.
I made some close friends at Florida, mainly from the gym, but it was a big school and I was always on the outside looking in, often thinking about what might have been.
I would look around and see guys that I was better looking and cooler than with way more friends and options for sex.
When it came down to it, however, just like any guy in college - I could have gotten laid more if I just tried.
But I simply didn't have enough courage to meet girls that I didn't already know. As much as I wanted to, at the time, I couldn't have been an outsider who got laid a lot in college (podcast).
I was always looking for the perfect college situation and kept transferring schools.
Why my parents let me do this, I'll never understand.
How Things Would Have Been Different
If I could do it all over again, I would have gone to Florida as a Freshman and joined a fraternity. As a 3rd year Sophomore, I joined a fraternity in 2003 (Furman University) but ultimately got kicked out because I just wasn't into it.
My generally lackluster sex life in college was the reason I got so obsessed with "pick up" and was wiling to drop everything (including a partial Law School scholarship) to try and make things right. If I had a good sex life in college, there would be no Good Looking Loser and I'd be a below-average attorney or personal trainer that still didn't Get Laid that much or make a lot of money.
(at Furman University, 2002-2003, I actually had a decent sex life; Furman is a small school (~3000 undergrads) and it was easier to get noticed and make friends/get girls)
Joining a fraternity is the easiest way to gain a social life and ultimately - a sex life.
If you are even somewhat socially established at a full-time university, I discourage you from transferring.
The grass is not always greener on the other side and finding a social life as a transfer is not easy if you are an introvert at a large university.
If you are an outsider in college, don't transfer, these options can help you become part of the scene. Listen to the Podcast with Alex for how to Get Laid as an outsider.
#2 I Wish I Stayed Out of ALL Long-Distance Relationships in My 20's
Part of my "coping" mechanism was to have long-distance relationships throughout college.
It provided me the perfect excuse to spend my nights in the gym and not even try to meet girls.
I loved showing other guys good pictures of my long-distance "girlfriends", some of which were actually good looking but it was always a cry for validation.
I would talk on the phone for hours and count the days until I could go home and be with my "girlfriend" and show her my progress I made in the gym.
I knew there was no future with with any of these girls and it was a complete waste of time.
A truly pathetic life at times.
My advice is to sleep with at least 30 girls and actually know you can be successful with women (Get Laid) before you lock yourself into any committed relationship.
No long-distance relationships whatsoever, unless they are on your terms.
How Things Would Have Been Different
If I didn't lock myself in these pointless stale long-distance relationships, I might have had a better sex life in college.
But probably not.
I suggest having a 'magic number' of how many girls you want to fuck before pursuing a serious relationship.
#3 I Wish I Asked Out 2-3 Girls a Week With This Type of Method
Experienced or inexperienced, the key to getting girls to spend time with you (and getting them alone to take things further) is to simply ask them to hang out.
Instead of doing this, I was always "working on" them with friendly conversation and waiting for them to give an a rejection-proof opportunity to try.
The perfect time to extend an invite is when you just had a decent conversation and you run out of stuff to say or you have to leave.
It is totally normal to ask for a girl's number when the friendly dialogue dies out regardless of how 'smooth' it went.
The main reason I had a hard time asking girls to hang out was because I hardly ever did.
Each "try" seemed like such a big deal because I so rarely tried. It felt like so much was on the line!
I can't tell you how much pussy (or at least warm opportunities) that I passed up on.
If I could do it over, I would ask 2 or 3 girls a week for their number and try to make plans with them on Friday or Saturday night - even if it was just to meet up with me and friends at a bar or party.
I actually did this at college, but only 2 or 3 times a year.
How Things Would Have Been Different
I had the appearance (when I wasn't bloated and disgusting from steroids) and the 'perceived status' to get plenty of girls.
If I simply had the balls to tell 2 or 3 girls a week -
Drop me your number, we'll hang out sometime.
My sex life in my early 20's would have tripled, even though I would have moved slowly with the girls.
That's literally all I needed to do.
If you haven't been Getting Laid, do the "normal" thing and ask girls for their number (don't necessary ask them out for that night).
Ask out 1-2 girls everyday if you aren't in college.
Ask out 2-3 girls every week if you are.
#4 I Wish I Got Tattoos and Earrings in My Early 20's
(Slightly Edgier Style)
I did get tattoos and earrings in my 20's, but I was 27 when I did.
I always felt that tattoos (and any style that wasn't Abercrombie & Fitch-ish) was only for thugs, white trash and try-hard followers.
(actually a 'normal guy prep' style is for followers)
When I got my first tattoo, I immediately realized it was long overdue and I could look in the mirror and see that I was no longer the totally timid socially indecisive nice guy who was scared to take risks.
I was finally embracing a "Do What You Want" mindset and officially not scared to stand out.
How Things Would Have Been Different
Would my 20's been totally different if I had a few tattoos and a pair of earrings?
Course not.
But interestingly enough, even the first week after I got earrings, I started getting a few compliments from the sexy not-so-prude girls that I was most attracted to. An edgy-than-average style, at least on the surface, communicates that you are a sexually active player and not boring boyfriend material who probably sucks in bed.
The nice guy appearance was dead and I knew it.
But I had finally ACTUALLY given myself permission to tell the world that I was different.
That was the biggest thing.
If you are considering getting tattoos - get one that isn't visible to start.
I guarantee you'll want more and won't regret it.
#5 I Wish I Had Taken the "Pick Up Stuff" More Seriously In My Mid 20's
Like most guys, I was hooked when I found the seduction community.
But like most guys, I did absolutely nothing but read and daydream after I found the "pick up" stuff on the Internet.
It wouldn't be until my late 20's that I actually started trying to use the material.
In fact, I spent an entire year in a pick up program without putting myself out there on a regular basis.
Say what you want about the "seduction community", a lot of the material is mental masturbation or frankly incorrect, but it will get you laid if your appearance is above-average and can talk to girls.
How Things Would Have Been Different
Like most guys, I had approach anxiety and it was a perfect excuse to procrastinate by reading and not go ALL IN.
Had I taken it more seriously, I could have been sleeping with a lot of pretty girls within 6 months, instead of 2 years.
There was nothing in the way of me getting pussy other than my own brain.
It took me a while to realize "reading" was completely counter-productive and I simply needed to talk to 5-10 girls a week and ask them out. But by that time, my brain was so saturated in "seduction theory" that I had gotten worse with girls.
(this was my fault, not anyone else's)
All the information you need to sleep with countless girls or have several fuckbuddies is on this site.
It's up to you to actually use it.
#6 I Wish I Had Taken Male Enhancement More Seriously in My Early 20's
I learned that I could increase my penis size (~5.25") with Jelqing and Stretching as early as 2001.
But I wouldn't start taking it very seriously until I found the Bathmate in 2009.
(Bathmate makes it fun and faster)
It sounds egotistical, but increasing my size really gave me a lot of confidence in the bedroom that I simply never had. There is no better cure for sexual anxiety than having a fat piece of meat resting on your right thigh and getting compliments when you show girls your size.
I'm not even huge and girls brag to their friends about my size.
How Things Would Have Been Different
If I had my current size (7.0") NSFW in my early or mid 20's, I would have been less timid with girls and probably gotten at least a few more chicks in bed.
Although my social circles were inconsistent (since I was always transferring colleges), on girth alone, I would have got the chance to experiment with girls that wanted to try a big guy.
(size rumors get around, especially among college girls who discuss which guys in their circles are endowed)
It wasn't until I got into the Hollywood club scene in 2010 that I realized that extent of the 'size advantage' when I started hanging out with same groups of drunk chicks on a regular basis. Even guys show you greater respect and get concerned if you have been chilling with their ex-girlfriends/prospects when they know your dick is a fattie.
While most curious, inexperienced girls will never directly inquire about your size - there are a fair amount of horny chicks that will if you are drunk with them at an afterparty and word has gotten around.
In reality, in my early 20's, a bigger dick wouldn't have made my sex life that much better. But I would have less sexual anxiety.
Male enhancement has never been faster or easier.
Using the Bathmate for 10 minutes anytime you take a shower will give you an inch on your dick and even more impressive girth.
#7 I Wish I Had Gotten Into Online Dating In My Early 20's
Back in the early 2000's, there was MySpace and HotorNot, but online dating was largely non-existent, still really taboo and a lot of girls thought it was a good way to get raped.
So there wasn't that much 'online dating' opportunity out there.
Still, I got (but mostly just talked to) some random girls from HotOrNot and on AOL Instant Messenger and there was plenty of opportunities to ask these girls to chill.
If you are inexperienced, online dating is the PERFECT way to spin your training wheels.
Just get in shape and get some good pictures and you're set.
Just like in real life, after that - just 'be normal' and ask girls out.
Related -
How Things Would Have Been Different
Online dating would have been really good for me in my early 20's.
I would have moved slowly with these girls, but I probably would have sealed the deal with some of them and realized I had plenty of options at my fingertips.
Online dating is exactly how I suggest guys lose their virginity if they have no prospects among their groups of friends.
Follow that guide.
#8 I Wish I Temporarily Lowered My Standards and Had a Semi-Consistent Sex Life in my Early 20's
(I Wish I Tried to Sleep With EVERY Semi-Attractive Girl That Liked Me)
We talked about this recently.
Everyone knows the potential benefits to temporarily lowering their standards to gain experience.
Although the divide might not seem like much, there is a considerable difference between guys that sleep with some average/below-average girls and guys that sleep with no girls at all.
The guys that sleep with some average/below-average girls at least know they can Get Laid.
The guys that have no sex life, [at best] might think they can Get Laid, but they don't truly believe it because it isn't actually part of their reality.
In my 20's, a lot of girls liked me.
But like I've told you -
The girls that liked me - I didn't like them.
The girls I liked - I was scared to talk to.
It made for a non-existent sex life, many months of the year.
The months add up and my sexual confidence was pretty low.
I knew girls liked me, but I didn't actually know that I could Get Laid since I wasn't doing it too often.
It was a huge problem and one of the main reasons that I was a late bloomer.
If I could go back in time, I would try to sleep with EVERY semi-attractive girl that liked me instead of evaluating how closely they met my ideal standard.
How Things Would Have Been Different
My ego was so big in my 20's that lowering my standards never was an option.
I was more likely to eat week-old diarrhea from a gas station toilet than hook up with a chick that my friends didn't fully approve of.
I was solely out for validation.
I actually took pride in not Getting Laid and letting everyone know when a girl that liked me didn't meet my lofty standards.
Had I somehow been able to lower my standards (impossible at the time), I would been far more emotionally healthy, gotten far more sexual experience and been easily able to pick up really hot girls after I got into all this 'pick up' stuff.
Instead, it took me 2 years to actually get comfortable with talking to and undressing the really pretty girls.
If you are actually going to follow through with the material on this website, you'll probably have to temporarily lower your standards at some point.
It can either be now or in a couple of years when you realize you still aren't Getting Laid.
So long as you look decent, you already have some girls that would sleep with you.
Try to have sex with them.
#9 I Wish I Stayed 7-10% Bodyfat and Realized That "Huge" Isn't Sexy
In my 20's, I looked my best when I was under 190lbs.
My version of "hot" wasn't what I looked like though.
I didn't want to be the pretty boy with the 6-pack that girls wanted to fuck.
I wanted to be the huge 6-2 235lb. outside linebacker-looking guy that girls wanted to fuck.
Only problem was - girls didn't have that on their agenda.
Guys always barraged me with compliments "you're huge!", "you're so strong!" and I ate it up.
I didn't realize that I slowly began to look like absolute shit. I just figured, "I need to cut some body fat", but I look great!
Not so.
It actually took me 8 years to realize that I looked better at 200lbs than at 225lbs.
How Things Would Have Been Different
While the things I've mentioned previously (getting earrings/tattoos, staying out of long-distance relationships) probably would have made a small difference at the end of the day, if I had looked my best throughout my 20's - I would have gotten A LOT more sexual experience, even though I moved very slowly with most girls.
I was on a dating show in 2002 when I had absolutely no "game", assertiveness or strong fashion sense and got all 3 girls. One of which was undeniably hot.
(I also wish I did more of these types of acting/talent jobs, it was fun)
If you can get on the "good looking" or "cute" radar of at least some girls, you will have NO PROBLEM Getting Laid so long as you can proactively start conversations and use one of these socially acceptable ways to ask them to sleep with you..
Remember "above-average" will put you on the 'good looking radar' with more girls than you can possibly fuck, you don't have to be a Perfect 10 to be Perfect to some girls.
It's not about being "Mr. Right", it's about being Mr. Right Now.
I'll have to think about it some more, but #8 (this one) is probably my biggest regret from my 20's.
At the same time, like I said, if I had a consistently good sex life in my early and mid 20's, I never would have gotten the mountains of pussy that I did in my later 20's and I wouldn't be getting paid for running this creepy site.
If you want compliments from guys, get big.
If you want compliments from girls, get ripped.
#10 I Wish I Was A Better Friend and Family Member in My 20's
I haven't been the greatest friend or family member.
The latter, being the more important one.
While I haven't necessarily been an asshole to my friends and family, I haven't been there as much as I should have been.
Let's face it, when you haven't been Getting Laid, when "doing chest" at the gym is the highlight of your week, when your life isn't quite going as planned - you tend to become very frustrated and negative.
While I never totally fit this description, not always anyway, I definitely let my not-getting-laid-much issues spill over into my relationships, often feeding on the pointless drama that I had created.
How Things Would Have Been Different
My life today wouldn't be much different if I had been a better family member or friend, I would just feel a little better about the situation.
I wish I was there more for my Grandpa when he got sick in 2003 and died in 2005. He always cherished the time we spent together but I was too obsessed with the gym and frustrated with my sex life to spend much quality time with him. His decline made me sad, so I sometimes stayed away when I should have been there.
In terms of friends -
I feel the right people remained in my life and the wrong people were 'screened' out.
When I left for California in 2007, I basically just stopped talking to everyone I grew up with and ignored their phone calls and texts (except for the few friends I truly cared about). Some people took this as blatant disrespect, even though it wasn't. I could have told people that it wasn't personal and explained that I needed to go my own way - but I guess I didn't care enough.
For better or worse, I was becoming a selfish douchebag.
Ironically, I really had to "Get Laid" to improve my relationships with my friends and family.
I encourage you to be very selfish in your 20's.
Try to be there when your older loved ones or true friends need it.
At the same time -
Mainstream Self Improvement Tip "Family Is Everything!". Actually no. Most successful people go their own way and put up with very little BS
— Good Looking Loser (@GoodLookingLosr) October 27, 2015
I don't actually think 'family is everything', too many people put up with bullshit from their family and should absolutely cut them off.
#11 I Would Have Respectfully Cut Off Stale Relationships Instead of Waiting For Them To Expire
With all that said, the opposite is true too.
There are plenty of relationships and friendships that were long past their peak that I symbolically held onto.
I just wouldn't let some of them go because of previous good history - even though some of my friends were very negative and often tried to drag me down.
How Things Would Have Been Different
If I walked away from the stale relationships, I would have made more new friends when I moved college-to-college and city-to-city.
Their negativity dragging me down wasn't actually the biggest problem.
The bigger problem was that I often prevented myself from making new friends as I bounced from college-to-college and city-to-city.
I decided that I "already had my best friends" and I wouldn't let other people into my life. I rejected genuinely good people that tried to befriend me.
I often made myself an outsider and relished the "lone[ly] wolf" role.
Still, I believe that the "Red Pill" too often encourages people to cut off friendships when things aren't 100% perfect or on their terms. Don't do that.
I have my own friendship standard that I go by now and it's worked out pretty well.
Once you get into your late 20's, your past interpersonal relationships will start to expire anyway - like it or not.
Pull the plug early if it's the best thing to do.
#12 I Wish I Drank and Did More Drugs In My Early 20's
Not counting the hundred of thousands of milligrams of steroids that I did - I was pretty 'straight-edge' in my early 20's.
I looked down on people that drank, smoked weed or used any type of recreational drugs.
This judgmental attitude fit my no-life, no-party bodybuilder persona and ensured that I wouldn't be getting any same day/night action.
(I did sleep with some girls on the same night in college, but this was before I became a total 'no-life' bodybuilder)
When it comes down to it, especially in college, the sexually-active girls drink and do drugs.
You are an outsider to the party scene if you don't.
Plus, until you beat approach anxiety, drinking/drugs can be a big helper.
note: I DO NOT think college students should be drinking or using drugs everyday. That type of full-party lifestyle is "okay" when you can party all night and wake up at 3 pm everyday like I did for a couple of years in Hollywood.
How Things Would Have Been Different
If I partied more in college, I would have gotten laid more.
That's actually how most guys meet women or Get Laid - they go out a ton with their friends and get lucky once every 2-3 months.
It's as simple as that.
As you might expect, partying was a virtual non-option once I became totally obsessed with bodybuilding in 2004. Every time I transferred schools, it would take time to make friends and most of my 'gym friends' didn't go out drinking.
I'm one of the only 'self-improvement' gurus that admits to using all sorts of "drugs" for performance enhancement. Drugs are not "good" or "bad", they are simply compounds that can be used responsibly or abused recklessly.
If you are 'against' drinking or doing drugs, you will never totally fit in the 'party scene'.
The party scene, not the bookstore, is the place you need to be for a truly wild sex life.
If you aren't into it, that's okay, learn easy ways to ask girls out during the day.
#13 I Wish I Played Less Fantasy Sports and Went to More College Sports Games
Unlike most self-improvement magicians, I'm not against guys playing fantasy sports if they have fun with it and don't spend too much time on it. DraftKings is a blast.
The latter was my problem, I spent WAY TOO MUCH time on it and spent hundreds and hundreds of hours each season looking at statistics, the waiver wire or trying to make trades.
Like the gym, fantasy sports was a 'productive' escape.
I went to the University of Florida at a really special time (2005-2007). The football team and the basketball team won 2 national titles each - that is absolutely unheard of.
It is the greatest college sports run of any university in the history of Division I athletics.
Instead of going to the games or celebrations, I was either at the gym or sitting in my room watching it on TV and checking my fantasy team.
How Things Would Have Been Different
If I played less fantasy sports in my 20's, I probably wouldn't have used the time to do anything social or constructive.
My fantasy sports addiction was really deep.
It didn't help that I won - a lot.
When I moved to San Diego for Law School in 2007 and to Los Angeles in 2008 - I quit fantasy sports and stopped watching sports altogether. I made absolutely enormous strides over the next 4 years and I didn't miss sports whatsoever.
I've gotten back into fantasy sports, but I have a way healthier relationship with it.
If you are going to play fantasy sports, make sure you don't spend too much time on it.
#14 I Would Have Asked For Help With Women In My Early 20's
(From One of My Friends That Got Laid a lot)
Like most guys in their young 20's, I had anxiety that prevented me from talking to hot girls that I didn't know and I was hesitant to take things a step further with the girls that liked me.
Still, a lot of my underachievement with the opposite sex was because I literally 'didn't know what I was doing'.
Since I didn't know, I often didn't try.
I was always waiting for the perfect moment and thought I needed to be smooth.
The sad part is, I had plenty of real-time resources (friends) that probably could have helped me out a great deal.
In particular, I had a former best friend, Danny, who was incredible with women because he was decent looking, courageous and had older cousins that showed him how it was done.
We were only 17 years old and he hooked up with a hot Miami Dolphins' cheerleader that he approached one night. I saw the whole thing and it was absolutely unreal to me and all of our friends. I was lucky to have him as a friend.
The problem was, Danny and I had an on-going silent competition (I did steal some girls from him because I was better looking) and I was terribly jealous of him. Funny part was - he slowly began to get jealous of me because he thought I was Getting Laid a lot because I was somehow able to steal girls from him.
Unfortunately, going to him for help with my sex life would have been a serious blow to my pride and something that wasn't realistic at the time.
related -
How Things Would Have Been Different
Realistically, had Danny and I stayed friends and I asked him for help, he probably couldn't have explained to me how he got hot girls to like him so much.
Danny (like a lot of the guys that get a ton of pussy in their teens), have no idea what they are doing and will just tell you -
Be confident.
Make her laugh.
Just kiss her.
It probably wouldn't have helped me.
I needed a surefire 'system' to follow and a full understanding of female psychology.
Still, I probably would have absorbed a lot from Danny that may have really helped me with women.
I'll never know.
He was a good friend that I pushed away.
You might not know a "Danny" or have an experienced friend that can give you help.
Obviously, that is where I come in.
I know this website can move slowly and you need everything I can give you. I try my best.
If you do have a friend that can help you (in anything), approach him about teaching you.
A lot of successful people really relish the mentor role.
Here are some tips for that.
#15 I Wish I Used Hair-Friendly Anavar Instead of More Androgenic Steroids In My Early 20's
Although I'm naturally prone to male pattern baldness, I greatly accelerated the process by taking large amounts of not-so-hair-friendly anabolic steroids in my early 20's.
Anavar is often considered "the safe oral steroid" since it has a marginal effect on DHT (hair loss, prostate) and estrogen (gynocomastia).
Real Anavar is expensive and it's less effective than Dianabol, Trenbolone and high levels of testosterone for building lean mass.
To save money and to max out my gains, I used androgenic compounds and tried to use bullshit "DHT blockers" such as topical spironolactone and saw palmetto formulas to prevent hair loss. It never worked.
Unfortunately, RU58841 (which protects from both types of DHT) wasn't accessible at the time.
(RU58841 does protect from DHT, but I've not tried it while using large doses of androgenic steroids)
related -
How Things Would Have Been Different
If I had used Anavar instead of large doses of testosterone, Dianabol, Trenbolone, Equipose, Deca-Durabolin, 1-Testosterone, Methyl-1-Testosterone, etc. I wouldn't have needed 2 hair transplants before my 28th birthday.
Since I have the money these days, hair restoration isn't a big deal, but I spent so much money on worthless hair loss prevention products and I didn't actually save money by not using Anavar.
That goes for dietary supplements too. I wasted thousands of dollars on worthless supplements that made a '1% difference', at best.
If you value your hair, Anavar is all you should use.
You don't need to trade hair for looks.
It's worth the extra money.
(careful - many underground labs sell low-dosed Dianabol as Anavar)
#16 I Wish I Had Tried to More Fun in My Early and Mid 20's
I've always been goal-oriented.
Partially out of insecurity, but partially out of simply wanting to get the most out of this short life.
I have always had the ambition and hard work part down.
The "have fun with your life"?
Not so much.
Sometime in my mid-20's I reflected on this and realized that I spent far too many hours of my life "preparing to have fun" while my uneventful life was slipping away.
I have lived by this since -
How Things Would Have Been Different
Just like not partying, I wouldn't let myself consistently have fun when I wanted. "Fun" was only a reward for success.
But I rarely rewarded myself and took life way too seriously.
Close friends could get me out of my shell but I was generally a really stiff person.
If I had a lot of fun in my 20's, I wouldn't have dropped out of Law School to have fun and become the helpful creeper you know as 'Good Looking Loser'. That's for sure.
Your 20's is about having fun and sleeping with girls.
I suggest you do both and before taking your life seriously.
#17 I Wish I Had Studied Finance or Accounting Instead of "Criminal Justice"
I call it "Criminal Justice", in reality I majored in "Criminology", the easiest and pretty much most worthless major you can have. My classes were full of dumb athletes and unintelligent girls.
(I had a minor in Business-administration, if that matters; it doesn't btw)
I picked 'Criminology' solely to inflate my GPA (3.73, I think) once I decided I was going to Law School.
Obviously, as you know from the 'Red Pill', the college academic experience is incredibly overrated and you won't use 99% of what you "learned".
At the same time, accounting or finance (the most respected of all University of Florida business majors), would have been semi-useful for running my businesses today.
How Things Would Have Been Different
Interestingly enough, had I majored in finance, my GPA would have been lower and I might not have been able to sneak my way into Law School.
(the reason I got a scholarship to the University of San Diego Law School was because I claimed I was a Native American - I even wrote a bullshit essay about it)
If this happened, I probably wouldn't have gone to San Diego (which allowed me an easy move to Los Angeles).
By the time Law School started, I was so obsessed with "pick up" that I couldn't even think straight.
I left Law School after 10 days and thus began my adventure.
I don't know how much finance or accounting would have actually benefited me - academia teaches you how to be a manager/worker and not an owner.
But I will admit it has been a struggle to understand personal finance, financial markets and other 'money' issues that EVERY MAN should know. I read Financial Samurai but a lot of it is hard for me to understand, but that's why I have 2 financial advisers and an accountant.
If you want to get rich, I suggest that you study something related to business. It might help.
If you are going to Law School, inflate your GPA and say that you are an oppressed minority. Serious.
Plan B
#18 I Wish I Took Better Care of My Skin in My 20's
Over the past 18 months, you've seen me make a significant effort to look younger.
It's gone pretty well I think.
Still, the key to looking younger is to take care of your skin before you have to fix it.
I'm very happy with the results of our "How to Look Younger (Skin Care Guide)" and the treatments cost less than $1/day.
I would have used these if I knew about them in my 20's.
How Things Would Have Been Different
Instead of looking 33 (sometimes I look younger/older in my videos), I would probably look 30 or 31.
Most chicks estimate that I'm 30 when I don't have facial hair.
If you want to look younger when you are in your 30's, take care of your skin NOW.
#19 I Wish I Retired After My Inline Hockey Team Won a Championship in 2005, Instead of Trying to Play College Football
For the record -
I went to the University of Florida, but I was never on the Florida Gators football team.
I sort of tried though.
After my inline hockey team won national tournament in 2005, I got particularly ambitious and thought I could juice up, train hard and walk on the Florida Gators football team.
Although I never played any sort of competitive football since 3rd grade, the idea wasn't completely crazy.
I was 6-2, 235lbs and I still had pretty good speed (or so I thought). I might have made the scout team, I wasn't thinking I would actually play.
In a recreational tackle football game on Memorial Day 2005, I planted my leg the wrong way and fully ruptured my left patellar tendon. It was the same injury that Victor Cruz had last year. The tendons supporting the knee completely shred and the knee cap detaches from the bone and goes up into the quad muscle. It's hideous to see. It's worse than an ACL tear and very few athletes ever return from it.
How Things Would Have Been Different
Had I not tried my chemistry-football experiment I would still be able to do heavy squats and I would have graduated Florida in 2005 instead of at the end of 2006.
I don't really know what else would have happened.
The injury (particularly the 8 months after the surgery) set my life on a very different direction.
Much of the 'off-time' was used to surf around the Internet and eventually found the pick up community. I was hooked and the direction of my entire life was changed.
Speaking of hooked - the knee injury also began my 2 year love-hate affair with Percocet. Which eventually led me to Kratom.
That would be completely life-changing too - in a good way.
"When one door closes, another opens" is so cliche, but in this case it was true.
You still have to trust your instincts and follow your dreams - I don't regret this even though I got seriously injured.
#20 I Wish I Took Better Care of My Teeth
(Keep Them White!)
Although I have never had a cavity (I have some good genetic thing where my teeth are virtually immune to rotting) and have very straight teeth - I didn't go to the dentist a single time between 2001 and 2013.
A big white smile is super valuable for first impressions.
Going to the dentist and getting your teeth professionally cleaned and whitened doesn't cost an arm and leg anymore.
In fact, you may be able get both for less than $100 on Groupon.
(check your local Groupon dentists)
How Things Would Have Been Different
I would have had whiter teeth in my 20's.
Since I don't hit on girls full-time now, I don't care as much.
I use some of this stuff which helps (not as much as professional whitening though).
Take care of your teeth and smile.
It's kind of a big deal and will separate you from the vast majority of guys.
#21 I Wish I Tried to Go Out Alone At Night More Often in My Early and Mid 20's
(Even When I Couldn't or Didn't Want to)
When I first found the 'pick up stuff' in 2006, I went out alone 2 times in Gainesville FL. (University of Florida).
Only then did I realize how hard it was and immediately started texting friends to meet up with me.
The same scenario repeated itself when I moved to San Diego and I came home highly discouraged that I didn't have the balls to talk to any girls. Then I quit trying for about 12 months.
Going out alone with the mission of talking to a girl, getting her to leave with you and getting her naked is a tall order if you can't even open your mouth and talk.
That is specifically why I made our baby-step-by-baby-step "How to Go Out Alone Program".
I only wish I tried to go out alone at night a bit more. Even if you go out and don't talk to anyone, it's exposure therapy and helps lower your anxiety.
The key is to not get discouraged or have some crazy expectation that you NEED to sleep with a girl for it to be a successful night.
How Things Would Have Been Different
If I kept going out alone, I would eventually be able to talk to girls in a somewhat comfortable manner.
If I talked to girls in a somewhat comfortable manner, I would eventually have at least 1 girl that was interested in me.
If I had at least 1 girl interested in me, I would eventually have sex with 1 of them.
If I had sex with at least 1 girl that I met by myself at night, I would know I could do it.
If I knew I could do it, I would do it again.
That is how confidence (experience) is built. It works if you don't quit or take long layoffs.
The key to going out alone is going out alone.
Do the program if you want to be able to go out alone 3 months from now.
#22 I Wish I Lived in a 'Party House' For At Least 1 Year in My Early 20's
(Living At the "White Castle" For Over 4 Months)
Aside from a few semesters, throughout college and my early 20's, I lived alone in my own apartment and accepted the lonesome times.
I never liked living with other people and most people don't love living with me.
I would keep weird hours, do drugs, I'm messy, and once girls came into the picture - I'm not someone that is great roommate material.
The thought of trading my privacy for roommates wasn't something I would ever consider.
However, in 2010, things took an unexpected turn.
Time for a little story -
My lease was up on my place in West Hollywood and I was having a rough time finding an apartment in the right price range.
8 months prior, I met a guy at Equinox Fitness who was a popular Hollywood club promoter.
We became friends and began trading our services -
- He would get me in free to most of the places/parties he promoted. The invite often included a table that came with free drinks, several other girls and a pre/post-party house usually with plenty of free drugs. .
- I would give him advice on his training and diet, as well as access to anabolic steroids, growth hormone and just about any other 'performance enhancing' compound that he wanted.
Needless to say, he was an excellent guy to be friends with. I met more hot girls because of this guy than EVERY SINGLE ONE of my friends/acquaintances combined. EVER.
He felt the same about me though.
For the first time in his life he looked fantastic, had a good sex drive and had some healthy alternatives to alcohol - Kratom and Phenibut. I even told him how to make his dick bigger and gave him advice on how to Get Laid a lot more.
(most promos Get Laid, but considering how much time and effort they put into their social lives - their sex life is quite modest)
Our personalities clicked too and we became very close friends.
He just kept giving-and-giving. He gave me more social opportunities than I could even handle.
(although I was good with women by 2010, he really opened a lot of doors [literally] that I never would have)
Much to the dismay of some of his other friends (many of whom he grew up with in Orange Country), he tried to introduce me to every single girl from their multiple party circles.
His friends eventually got used to the fact that I was part of their circles and that they might as well be cool with me because I wasn't going away.
For several months, he had been twisting my arm to move into the 'Castle', sometimes called the "Queen's Castle" (that was our corny name for the house).
The Castle wasn't that far from.
It was a real party house.
Every.single.night and most days too.
It had 6 bedrooms (+ guest house "cottage"), 5.5 bathrooms, flat screen TVs in most rooms, a pool, indoor spa/mini-pool, multiple courtyards, sauna, balconies, indoor 1/2 basketball court, incredible views of the Hollywood Hills, big basement and a huge driveway for parking.
(many Hollywood promoters rent and live in these big houses, it's where they throw their parties)
Not a ridiculously huge Oprah Winfrey mansion, but it passed the test.
Anyway, after declining his offer about 3 times (I could come over anytime I wanted to, I didn't have to live there), he told me to not worry about the money and just move in.
I decided to accept the offer but told him that I'd only be staying a couple weeks.
I couldn't be living in a place where there was non-stop cocaine and pool parties. I couldn't live at a place where I'd party until 4 am and wake up at 11:30 am with a pool party, protein shake and drugs waiting for me.
I had basically been doing that for the past 2 years (on a budget) and not everyday.
I stayed rent-free for 4 of 5 months and indulged in every excess, just about every single day and probably should have gone to rehab when I moved out.
All the memories aren't super clear and although I had to move out for my own health and sanity, I had 50x more fun in that 4+ month period than my entire 6+ years at college. It was non-stop Spring Break with hardcore drugs and girls who wanted to party.
I realized that I should have lived in a fraternity house or some other party house for just 1 year when I was younger - instead of always living in comfortable isolation.
I realized I more-than-accomplished absolutely every social/sex goal that I ever had and it was time to go a different direction with my life.
Moving out of "The Castle" was tough (I was probably in withdrawal too), those 4 months made up for such a mundane extended college experience.
To say we "partied like rockstars" would be accurate. It was only about 4 months (for me) but we partied like kids that had an unlimited supply of money, drugs, girls and never had to be semi-sober or leave the house for a concert. The time flew by.
On a more serious note -
For 2 months after I moved out, I had a hard time doing basic math (4 + 11 = 411) and my short-term memory was virtually shot. I had a "stupid feeling" all the time. I was worried that I had brain damage but everything cleared up.
It was the most wild experience of my entire life.
How Things Would Have Been Different
In my early 20's living at a party house wasn't even an option - I won't even speculate how my life would have been different.
I couldn't stand living with anyone other than my stuffed animals.
Even if you are a 'privacy person' or an introvert, I still encourage you to consider living in a party house for a year in your 20's.
It will take some getting used to but you'll create memories that last forever.
If it doesn't work out - just move out.
#23 I Wish I Spent 6+ Months Living in Europe in My Early 20's
I've lived full-time in several different cities (Maryland/DC, Atlanta, New York City, Greenville (South Carolina), Gainesville and Naples (Florida), San Diego, Los Angeles and Boise) and taken 2.5 cross-country road trips through the majority of states. I've also taken short trips to Canada, the Bahamas, Bermuda and a couple of other places in the Western Hemisphere.
Outside of a single trip (with a former fuckbuddy and her family) to London, I haven't been outside of North America.
One of the reasons I was so giddy about learning "pick up" was the prospect of traveling to foreign lands to sample the local pussy.
But that never happened unfortunately.
When I was finally able to go out and Get Laid consistently (age 28), after White Castle, I had no money whatsoever and my priorities began to shift strictly on building my personal training business.
(obviously I can travel now, but it's just not a major priority)
But it is something that I wish I had done in my 20's.
How Things Would Have Been Different
Traveling when you can Get Laid and traveling when you can't is two very different experiences.
Even though I wasn't good with women in my early 20's, I still should have traveled abroad with a group of students. It would have been a good thing.
(you will hook up with girls in your travel groups)
I was way too uptight with spending time in the gym and would have been an emotional wreck if I couldn't workout 5+ days a week and eat my usual 4000 calories and 300 grams of protein. Traveling was out of the question.
Also, I made the hasteful decision to get on hormone replacement therapy at age 23, which would have presented a huge hassle if I left the United States for any extended period of time.
Bummer.
If you have the opportunity to travel abroad in your early 20's, I encourage you to do it.
Even if you aren't good with women yet, it will still be a good experience and put you outside of your comfort zone.
Just trying to talk to people in their country is good practice if you have social anxiety.
#24 I Wish I Had Seen Something Like This Over-and-Over
"Hollywood Loves Your Inferiority Complex - The Truth About Hot Girls"
Although I was friends with plenty of hot girls in my teens and early 20's and even slept with a few of them, I was still really intimidated by hot girls that I didn't know.
Like most guys, hot girls that I didn't know seemed like alien lifeforms to me.
From another planet.
Spoke another language.
It was a 'Social Freedom', 'Tolerance to Beauty', 'Sense of Entitlement' thing, but it was also that I literally didn't ACTUALLY realize the impact of makeup, hair extensions, eye shadow (that's a big one!), etc. really had.
I didn't realize that the 'unattainable' girl that I was scared to talk to was only slightly above-average, at best.
The whole thing, with the exception of certain 'popular scenes' in select cities, is a total mindfuck that is meant to make you feel inferior so you buy drinks for yourself and girls to feel better. In fact, you are probably equal or better looking than the vast majority of girls.
I knew this by age 25, but it wasn't until I was 29 when I actually believed it.
How Things Would Have Been Different
Had I not been intimidated by the majority of hot girls I didn't know, I would have most certainly gotten more pussy.
The main reason that most [above-average] guys don't sleep with hot girls is because they don't try.
The main reason that most [below-average] guys don't sleep with hot girls is because they don't make the effort to make their appearance above-average.
Even if you inexperienced, you probably know how at least 1 hot girl looks without makeup.
That's how they all look.
#25 I Wish I Made More Effort To Dress Well in My Early 20's
In 2005, I was still in college and the majority of my friends had already graduated.
I remember visiting some of them in New York City that summer and going out to a club.
For the first time in my life, it struck me that everyone looked cooler than I did.
I was still wearing the same Abercrombie & Fitch cargo pants from high school, a short-sleeve faded polo shirt, a wimpy thin belt and I had to borrow dress shoes from Danny.
Everyone else was wearing newer clothing and I really felt out of place. I looked and felt like a college frat boy. Even my previously cool Von Dutch trucker hat made me feel like a girl.
That was a low point. It's not like I dressed poorly in my early 20's, but for a period of time I had outdated clothing that didn't fit me like so many no-life bodybuilders do.
Related -
How Things Would Have Been Different
I lived in Florida (it's hot) and rarely went out to any clubs so there was never a need to be prepared.
Wearing more current clothing wouldn't have changed much in my case because I simply didn't interact with many girls during this period.
An average looking guy can easily hit 'above-average' status by dressing well and taking care of himself.
Very few guys, especially in college and their early 20's, make the effort to dress well or layer their clothes.
Use this to your advantage and don't worry if they call you a "faggot".
#26 I Wish I Pursued Acting and Modeling In My Early 20's
Before I got gross and bloated from large amounts of testosterone and overfeeding, I definitely had 'the look' (bi-racial people were the new trend) and did a little bit of modeling in my early 20's. I was even with an agency called 'Millie Lewis' for about 10 months.
There weren't a tremendous amount of an opportunity in Greenville, SC. but there were definitely quite a few of auditions or talent gigs that I passed up on because it was outside of my comfort zone or not the roles I wanted.
Also, I hated the whole 'pretty boy' persona and eventually juiced myself into oblivion.
When I walked into New York agencies, I was 180 lbs. and was told I was "too commercial" for high fashion and probably to big for fitness modeling too.
(this was ridiculous, fitness modeling is totally about whoever looks good)
Nonetheless, it discouraged me and I decided that it wasn't for me.
How Things Would Have Been Different
I was never going to be a high fashion model (male fashion models are almost always required to fit into a children XL shirt, never bigger than an adult medium), but I EASILY could have gotten into entertainment or fitness modeling.
In my first ~6 months of actually trying, I got on a dating show, did a CarMax commercial and got a non-film role as Tarzan at a shopping mall promo.
The dating show was fun but I felt I was 'too good' for the other roles and somehow pictured myself on huge billboards without any effort.
But honestly, I never totally was into it. I was only in it for the validation and I had a fragile ego that was at risk when auditions didn't work out.
My friend Luke Guldan is a well-known working model and he has to work and diet so hard. I never had his passion for it. Luke is REALLY strong unlike most guys in the industry.
If you have 'the look', just try it for a year.
If nothing else, you can meet a ton of young hot superficial girls who want to date a model so they can showoff to their friends.
That is the main thing I missed out on.
#27 I Wish I Had Become a Bartender in My Mid 20's
As suggested in our series on college, becoming a bartender is a great way to get a social life and make a few bucks in the process.
But as with the 'no-party' lifestyle, it wasn't something that I wanted to do at the time.
I wish I had though. It's a job that helps you develop your social skills and you can use in any city.
How Things Would Have Been Different
This would have been very good for me, I would have met a lot more girls and made a lot of friends.
Although you'll most make 'acquaintances', it's a great way to meet people and get used to the bar/club scene.
I suggest that most guys seriously consider bartending in their early or mid 20's.
It's a pretty 'safe' way to significantly transform your social skills if you are introverted.
#28 I Wish I Was Simply More Honest With Myself in My Early and Mid 20's
This is the biggest one.
If you get nothing else out of this discussion - hear this.
The reason I was such an underachiever in my 20's was simply because I was not honest with myself.
I was not honest with myself about how socially and sexually inexperienced I was.
(I wasn't a virgin, but I felt uncomfortable in most social situations)
I was not honest with myself that doing nothing but lift weights and eating food wasn't getting me laid.
I was not honest with myself that my life truly revolved around what other people thought of me.
I was not honest with myself that I needed far more emotional improvement than physical improvement.
I was not honest with myself that I was the problem, not everyone else.
So what was the truth?
In my early and mid 20's, I was a good looking kid that was highly insecure and turned to steroids to try to accelerate my sex life and self esteem. It didn't really work, I looked far better at 180lbs and I progressively looked worse-and-worse once I got over 210 lbs.
But the gym offered an escape from my undersexed reality and gave me a sense of purpose and strength.
The root cause of all my problems was that I was addicted to validation because I got so little when I was growing up.
Validation from guys was great, but validation from girls was what I lived for.
Getting validation from women isn't necessarily harmful and can even be a healthy thing (see #5), but those with the 'validation mindset' are terrified of rejection.
Validation is acceptance, rejection is the opposite.
I was terrified of rejection and rarely took the "risk" of trying to get girls unless I knew for certain that they would like me back, and even then I often looked for a way out.
That was the reason I underachieved with women in my early and mid 20's.
I was scared and simply didn't try.
How Things Would Have Been Different
It took me about 26 years, everything started to change when I began to be honest with myself and where I was really at.
I confronted my reality, my anxieties and stepped away from the comfortable gym-eat denial life that I had created.
Some people say -
Getting Laid won't fix all your problems...
That might be true for some people.
But honestly, it fixed most of mine. Pussy was all I wanted in the first place.
It was the reason I went to the gym.
It was the reason I thought I wanted to be some big shot Lawyer.
It is the reason that I was able to create Good Looking Loser.
You're only going to do big things in your life if you start being totally honest with yourself as soon as possible.
What's your current emotional, sexual and financial situation?
It is better than it was 6 months ago? How about 12 months ago?
Are you ACTUALLY trying to work on it or are you still in "research" mode?
I got out of research mode 6 years ago and never looked back.
Pour Conclure
I don't have all the answers, my early and mid 20's left a lot to be desired, but I've really figured a lot of things out.
I never pictured that I'd be doing what I am today, but much of it is because I was eventually willing to be honest with myself and try to do things that other people think were crazy.
One thing I have learned is -
Once things start moving in the right direction, they start to change quickly. It doesn't matter if you are 20, 25 or 30 years old and feel like you are making up for lost time, things can get better in a hurry.
You'll see.
Thank you for reading!