Are You Too Smart and Sophisticated to Get Laid A Lot?
(Does Being Sophisticated Repels Pussy?)
Original: August 13, 2012
Updated: January 30, 2016
I recently got an email from a guy that I've been working with since January. There's not many guys under age 24 that can that can pick up and bang the very hottest girls. This guy is one of them. I feel he has the potential to be where I was 28, before he turns 24. Despite logistical issues with his conservative small town, he's been able to meet and date lot top-shelf pussy. This is usually a sign that, with some more experience, his results would skyrocket in a big city. The expectation is that he will be one of the few guys that bangs 100+, hot girls. Among the top 10% of the top 1% of all non-celebrity guys. Elite.
Compared to guys his age he is very "sophisticated."
In his own words-
"[I] appreciate the 'finer things in life' as gay as that might sound and [I'm] doing pretty good in general. You know, knowing stuff about music, art, food or whatever the fuck it is that others don't. I think I'm more that type of guy."
He's beginning to think that his sophistication is actually getting in the way. He seems to be attracting/(screening in) similar girls, who, in his country- aren't DTF as much as the less "sophisticated" girls.
He made this observation after his less sophisticated/intelligent roommate banged his 8th girl of the year.
(I don't know the quality of pussy (in terms of looks) that his roommate pulls)
He's a good looking kid. 6 Foot 3. In good shape. He's no fucking bookworm nerd either. His style is tight. Non-verbally he's doing all the right stuff- touching girls, early and often.
So what's the deal? Is sophistication actually working against him [in terms of GETTING LAID]?
Here's is my response -
As far as getting laid, it doesn't matter how sophisticated you are or aren't.
Your ability to look sexy and use physical dialogue to locate horny girls is what getting laid about.
What I can say is -
If you are presenting yourself as super sophisticated, you are going to trigger girl thoughts such as -
- long-term project
- boyfriend material
- boyfriend potential (not a bad thing)
- financial provider and dream guy
- SAFE guy from a nice family
... and turn off or water down the "player" persona that is so helpful in getting laid.
Remember, if you want to get laid a lot, you are looking for girls that are also "players," at the same point in their lives - not girls that you have to spend weeks/months/money convincing to trade sex for a relationship.
Girls, experienced or not, generally don't want to fuck their dream guy ASAP because they see him as a "catch" and they absolutely don't want to get judged for sleeping with him. They try to get their dream guy emotionally invested, that is the only way that the dream guy will stay around since he seemingly has a ton of other relationship options. Withholding the pussy from Mr. Dream Guy and making him work for it is the way girl's do that.
I know, I used to be every girl's dream guy and "perfect boyfriend" (really, I was...).
Now look at me.
That's not to say being sophisticated isn't "sexy" though. It is.
But let me give it some context -
Being sophisticated can be sexy just the same as being "romantic" is sexy.
In fact they go hand-in-hand actually.
Think fine a date with fine wine, h'orderves and deep intellectual decision about the sociological trends of the United Kingdom vs. Britannia.
It's the girls looking for boyfriends that most like this kind of night.
This will do nothing but get in the way your effort getting laid because of the stuff I mentioned above.
The guys that rely on romance to get laid, it's usually part of a courting process.
If the girl is into that type of thing, you aren't on a date with the right girl - if you are trying to get laid.
You know me pretty well, so this might not be a surprise to you - but I'm actually pretty "sophisticated" myself.
(no really - I am)
I didn't go to Oxford or Princeton, but I'm actually told that I'm "sophisticated" by girls other than my Mom.
GoodLookingLoser.com doesn't look that way, obviously. And I'm only going to get into that as the lifestyle section develops.
With my top girls, I'd often go to dinner in Beverly Hills, wander around some nice hotels late night, art museums during the day, talk about political science, drink wine and eat low-fat expensive cheese (at my apartment).
Some of the girls I go out with are sophisticated too or they dig me so much that a lesson about the Eastern Front in World War II is sexy to them.
Smarts is sexy - but only to girls you've ALREADY fucked or are looking for a relationship.
But I don't really show my sophisticated side if I'm out and I want to Get Laid however. At least not a lot of it.
This is why-
Getting laid is nearly all ANIMALISTIC.
YOU LOOK HOT, I LOOK HOT, so I'm take you home with me.
That's vibe I maintain - subtly when I meet a girl, but hardcore when I get her alone.
So aside from mentioning, "I live in Bel Air," or "My friend is having a dinner party at this mansion in Malibu on Saturday, French cuisine." I don't get into much of a discussion about it. Maybe a little as I'm touching her. I don't want to turn off the animal in me or her.
I was at the same point you are, with the SAME sort of thoughts, maybe even moreso -
Sometimes I'd get mad at the girls, "These girls are so stupid!!! UGHH.. They all like this shitty music/reality TV!!!"
Sometimes I'd get mad at myself "I'm just a fuckin nerd, I can't get this hot pussy in Hollywood!"
Neither were true though.
I've learned something though-
(what did you learn Chris?)
Being sophisticated is only one part of being a well-rounded person.
A lot of people think, because they are sophisticated, they are well-rounded and the ultimate man.
I actually [would] get a lot of sophisticated girls, they are very "proper" when I meet them. On dates, they are uptight at first but when I start talking about naughty shit they get all into it - they don't often get the chance to go out with a sophisticated/perverted guy.
So I encourage you to develop all aspects of your personality.
Be that guy.
- Laid Back
The first one is the most important for getting laid, quickly.
At the same time though, if finding a highly sophisticated/non-Jersey Shore bimbo girl is important to you - you should absolutely show that side of yourself, weed out the idiots and bring in the right ones.
But you'll have to accept that it may will slow stuff down and screen out girls that are more sexually active.
If not, just dress sophisticated-ly and act like a fucking dog. You might find female sophisticated dog that's just like you.
In Los Angeles (2008-2011), there's a few types of girls that I always seem to sleep with -
- Hairstylists - Hot, pretty happy, dumb as shit (not sophisticated)
- Models/Actresses/Club Girls - See above (not always happy), many do drugs, ambitious (not usually sophisticated)
- Fitness/Beach girl s- Not as "Hollywood"-ish, usually abstain from drugs and large amounts of alcohol (not usually sophisticated)
- Nurses - Intelligent women, the opposite of the others, generally in decent shape (generally sophisticated)
- Rich girls - This one completely varies (generally very sophisticated)
These profiles were quite than the girls I used to mainly attract - "Girl next door", Friendly Girl, Slightly-Above Average Girl, Extroverted Girls.
A big part of it, however, was that I didn't have the balls to talk to the girls I wanted to. Once I got over most of my approach anxiety, I was able to "attract" the girls I wanted, since most of them liked me all along.
I have the "sophisticated animal" thing down pretty well though, it's appealing to all sorts of girls. But I definitely wasn't always this way.
Before I got good at meeting chicks, the only girls I could get were the sophisticated hot girls. (this might seem desirable but they were usually more into the 'dating' thing). I was scared of the wild "slutty" girl... and want to lick their pussies so bad after they got done dancing and teasing undersexed guys in a nightclub.
But again, I wanted what I couldn't have - the wild sexy girls that get the MOST attention, that turn down 20 guys a night, that have 5 guys texting them an hour.
I didn't have the animal in me when I was yonger.
"Maybe I should also focus on different type of girls (more slutty) but I don't think I'm their type, as self-defeating that might sound."
This would be the first thing I suggest too. But "focusing" isn't necessary. Just screen a bunch of girls. Some you'll like, some you won't.
If your looks, style and social freedom are tight - the ONLY issue is if the girl is sexually available. That's it. It's on her.
As far as being a girl's "type," if you are good-looking... you are her type.
End of discussion.
More girls like you that you know. They are just wanting and expecting you to take the lead. the better looking you are- the more leadership you have to take because a lot of girls will think you are unattainable. If you get above 220lbs (muscle) you'll REALLY have to run the show.
Embrace that though.
That's what you want in the long run.
No shit tests, no bullshit, just a girl that says to herself, "I'm down for whatever this guy has in store for me. And No one is messing it up for him or me."
Girls categorize guys, you should too.
My suggestion is to start doing what nearly all guys that are really good at this (as part of a lifestyle) do.
Separate the girls -
1) Sophisticated/your type that you can date/bang (relationship prospects)
2) All the others that you can bang (sex prospects)
When you meet a girl and feel that is isn't sophisticated or smart, immediately get aggressive with her. You can literally tell her "SHUT UP" and start kissing her and move fast. There's nothing on the line. Naturally you'll stop caring about "losing" these girls anyway.
I really recommend this.
So in conclusion, actually being sophisticated isn't really the problem.
It's the lack of a "non-sophisticated" (player) side.
But if you are trying to get laid - presenting yourself as sophisticated can be a problem if you are dropping your ANIMAL persona. It will trigger the wrong things, even and especially if the girl likes you.
If you are trying to get laid, turn down the sophistication a little bit. Not completely, but at least show that you are an ANIMAL first. You can show that you are sophisticated animal a little later.
I'm a fan of getting to know girls after you bang them. Like Aaron Sleezy says, "that's when the barriers drop and you really get to know each other." I've found that to be true.
I hope this makes sense.
Related reading -
- "The Curse of the High IQ" by Aaron Clarey
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