Swag Factor (Coolness) Defined; The Missing Piece For Hot Pussy v1.0
Swag Factor (Social Status/Skills Examined)
updated: December 2016 (Restored)
Why Some Guys with Good Looks, Style, Social Freedom are still Underachieving with Women...
This is one of the main reasons that a lot of guys are unsuccessful at getting a lot of top-shelf women. Even guys with pretty good Looks, Style and Social Freedom that REALLY play the numbers game. This is the lesser and more complex 4th (and final) factor.
This is an interesting topic.
A complex one, even though I try to simplify it while covering it from head-to-toe.
This one has taken me over 6 days to write and mull over.
(I even tripped out on ACID to gain further insight. I'm just kidding. Don't believe every word I say.)
This is some of the very best stuff on this entire site. You won't find stuff like this anywhere else. If you feel you've been underachieving, you might want to take 7-10 days to go through this discussion. I don't usually say that, I just think that this subject is really worth understanding 100%.
Unlike most topics where I just yell at you, "~Screen that pussy!@#!, NEXT!! Okay she's DTF, take her to a private place!@!" this one was a challenge even though the conclusion is obvious.
My Background
Despite the name "Good Looking Loser," Social Skills (and something I call 'Swag Factor') were not elements that I really lacked. I had above-average Social Skills in 2006 and now I have slighty-above-above-average Social Skills. I'm not that social butterfly guy and I never want to be.
If you are interested in my journey, this tucked-away discussion sheds light on it-
- "How Chris Went From Good Looking Loser to Good Looking Creeper"
(Sarasota Justin and Social Situations, 2012)
http://www.goodlookingloser.com/2012/01/08/beating-social-anxiety/
In my early/mid 20s- I was a pretty cool kid that was underachieving in my sex life because I was a total pussy, had a lot of nice guy issues and literally "didn't know" what I was doing in my early 20s. All fairly "fixable" things. I had body image issues as well (early 20s). So, the insights I've collected on this topic don't specifically come from direct experience but rather- HOURS and HOURS of evaluating and organizing personality types among students that succeed quickly, succeed slowly, fail slowly or fail quickly.
The most telling "subjects" were the students that were decent looking, had decent fashion sense and above-average social freedom but [AT BEST] could NEVER score anything above average girls on a consistent basis. Also telling were the guys that had a tremendous amount of social freedom but still could not get laid... ever. Unfortunately, countless numbers of guys in the PUA community had to fall on their face (and not get up) for me to gain insight on this.
I'm here to give an insightful, yet temporarily incomplete answer to "What's Wrong?"
Don't worry, despite the disclaimer, the concepts I talk about are going to be 1000x more relevant, productive and "insightful" than most any other PUA-monkey site where the guys are simply Internet marketers that don't get any hot, wet, oh my God Chris-she's-8.5-years-younger-than-you Venice Beach pussy.
If you are "stuck" and have made the legitimate effort to have above-average looks, style, social freedom AND play the numbers game- this post is for you.
This certainly won't be the last one on this topic either.
Off to theory land... and away we goooo....
Disclaimer
Despite the insane amount of information in this discussion, remember- You DON'T need to be much more than "above-average" with your SWAG FACTOR to succeed at a ridiculously high level. Do not get discouraged. I have devoted ~4 years of my life to sleeping with hot girls, of course- I know all this.
"Swag Factor: The Missing Piece to Getting Consistent Top-Shelf Pussy" (Video 1/3)
This is some of my very best stuff, I suggest you watch these videos.
Give yourself a whole week to read/watch this discussion.
The Plateau
Some guys, a minority of guys, achieve above-average Looks, Style and Social Freedom but it doesn't translate to an above-average sex life.
They are "stuck" getting average looking girls and only a slightly above-average quantity of them, at best.
I'm going to tell you what the problem is and which guys tend to encounter this.
Since the topic is extensive, in future articles we'll have a little discussion about how to fix it.
Fundamentals to Get Pussy
If you are familiar with our material (or just have a non-weirdo view) on how to Get Laid, you'll know that the majority of getting laid comes down to 3 things-
- Looks
- Style
- Social Freedom
Looks and Style can be combined and be called "Sex Appeal."
We take an in-depth look at Looks and Style here-
So if you have above-average "Sex Appeal" and "Social Freedom," and you are willing to play the numbers game (hit on 20+ girls a week), you will have the opportunity to have at least an above-average sex life in both quality and quantity. Generally if a guy with above-average Sex Appeal and Social Freedom hits on 20+ girls a week, he will be in the top 1 or 2% of all men on the face of the earth.
Remember- the average guy doesn't speak to humans he does not know. He just stares at his feet in silence.
SWAG FACTOR (Coolness)
With the fundamentals, there is a 4th factor at work-
"Coolness"
It is a very general word.
You know it when you see it but it's not easy to define. I'll give you a 2-critera definition in a second.
Above-average Looks, Style and Social Freedom only translates into an above-average sex life IF you have an above-average level of "Coolness." If people do not perceive you as a cool guy, you will only be able to score with average girls, at best.
Your "Coolness," plays a significant role the in QUALITY of the woman you get and your ability to retain HOT girls as fuckbuddies.
As of January 2013, we haven't totally focused on Coolness because the average guy just needs to get off his ass and work on his Looks, approach anxiety and put on some cooler clothes that communicates he isn't totally sexually-inactive to start getting results.
What is Swag Factor (Coolness)?
Swag Factor (Coolness) is
- the level that the general population perceives you to fall within the social hierarchy; and
- your ability to increase or reinforce your position.
The PUA Community calls this "Social Value".
While I actually I agree with the concept, it only tells half the story.
Social Freedom ≠ Swag Factor (Coolness)
This is an issue that I didn't have a complete understanding of... until a couple of days ago. I was a pretty cool kid. Once I got social freedom, the top girls could see it and I started to land them. I generally assumed that once a guy got Social Freedom then the HOT pussy would arrive on his doorstep. If it wasn't working, than he needed to put on some Cool clothes or get to the gym and that would finish the job. True for most, but not for some.
Swag Factor (Coolness) is related to Social Freedom, but it's not entirely the same thing.
A Cool guy has Social Freedom; but a Socially Free guy isn't always cool.
Since "Coolness" is vague, it's important to understand- we are talking about Social Coolness.
Elements to Swag Factor (Social Coolness)
There's two major elements to Swag Factor.
- Social Status (Social Presence or "Social Value")
- Social Skills (Ability to communicate or raise your position)
Element 1: Social Status (Social Presence)
Social Status is the perception of your relative position in the social hierarchy.
Like Looks, Style and Social Freedom, you will want to have at least above-average Social Status if you want to score top-shelf twat consistently.
- For non-celebrity girls, in general, their Social Status is determined by how hot they are.
- For non-celebrity guys, in general, our Social Status is determined by an extensive range of perspective criteria. (see below)
That perspective criteria, in addition to Looks and Style (Sex Appeal/Sexual Presence) will make a guy "stand out" and have positive Social Presence.
Social Status (Presence) is SUPER IMPORTANT if you want to fuck and retain the hottest girls. After all, most of them dedicate their young adult years to MAX'ing out their social status. They want to be with a MAN on their level or above them. Superficial or not, if you want to fuck the hottest girls- you NEED to understand this. Just as we profile girls via "screening," and just looking at them- women are going to profile you too. It isn't changing no matter how upset you get about it. Understand it and learn how to use it to your advantage.
Within seconds, based on your overall presentation (appearance, clothing, vibe, age, friends, etc.), women will have or guess the answers to numerous status questions and there will generally be a consensus among her peers.
Below is a very general list based on how HOT sexually-available high status girls think.
It is in no way a comprehensive list and level of importance among criteria will vary from girl to girl.
You certainly DO NOT have to get a definite "YES" to each question to fuck the girl.
But for elite women- you shouldn't get a definite "NO" on any more than about 3 or 4 of these questions, especially in socially competitive cities.
43 Social Status (Profile) Questions from Sexually-Available Hot Girls
^List complied by- Me and 2 Nothing-Short-of-Really-Hot girls (Blake & Adriana) in 21 minutes and 9 seconds
- Is this guy on my level: Is this guy's coolness on the level with my hotness?
- Is this guy cool?
- Is this guy cooler than I am? Or at least equal?
- Is this guy cooler than my friends?
- Is this guy cooler than the other guys here?
- Does this guy think he is cool?
- Does this guy have good genetics?
- Can I bring this guy around my friends?
- Is this guy part of the "in-crowd" or is he an outsider?
- Does he roll with cool guys or are his friends total losers?
- Can I be seen with this guy?
- Is this guy comfortable with his body?
- Would this guy be comfortable seeing me naked?
- Is this guy comfortable around girls like me?
- Does this guy have Hot Girls as friends?
- Is it cool to fuck this guy?
- If I fucked this guy what would my friends say?
- Does other hot girls find this guy attractive?
- Is he tall?
- Is this guy healthy?
- Does this guy smell good?
- Does this take guy care of his body?
- Is this guy sexually active?
- Is this guy physically active?
- Is this guy good in bed?
- Does this guy have sex with hot women? Or just he just jerk off to them?
- Is this guy hung or have at least a above-average sized penis?
- Is this guy connected? Does he have access to stuff that I don't have access to?
- Is this guy wealthy? Or he can this guy at least support himself?
- Is this guy fun to be around?
- Is this guy a leader? Or a follower?
- Does this guy have a cool lifestyle or is he a loser?
- What kind of "job" does this have?
- Does this guy have something cool going on in his life?
- Is this guy comfortable with standing out?
- Can this guy defend himself in a fight?
- Do other guys look up to this guy?
- Is this guy "stingy" in bed?
- Do people take advantage of this guy?
- Is sex "no big deal" to this guy?
- Is this guy non-judgmental? Or does this guy refer to sexually active girls as 'sluts'?
- Is this guy a good guy/scumbag and not a nice guy?
- Is this guy physically active?
Again, you don't have to have a definite "YES" to all of these questions. You just shouldn't get a definite "NO" to a lot of them.
Chances are, if you if think the answer is "NO," then it's almost certain that the everyone thinks the same.
"Swag Factor: The Missing Piece to Getting Consistent Top-Shelf Pussy" (Video 2/3)
This is some of my very best stuff, I suggest you watch these videos.
Give yourself a whole week to read/watch this discussion.
When they are sexually available and not looking for a boyfriend-
Adriana's (22/f, Model, Super Cute, Sweetheart) 3 most important questions are-
- 1) Is this guy on my level: Is this guy's coolness on the level with my hotness?
- 2) Is this guy cool?
- 14) Is this guy comfortable around girls like me?
Adriana says: I literally took 40 minutes to decide on these. But questions 1 and 2 shed light on the whole picture. If he's cool, I hope he likes me too.
Blake's (25/f, Singer/Model, Super Hot, Bitchy/Annoying) 3 most important questions are-
- 1) Is this guy on my level: Is this guy's coolness on the level with my hotness?
- 32) Does this guy have a cool lifestyle or is he a loser?
- 38) Is this guy "stingy" in bed?
Blake says: A guy is either cool or he isn't. You can tell in the first 30 seconds. I don't get it wrong too often.
In future discussion, we'll talk about how to "be cooler," it is an extensive lifestyle topic.
As you know, techniques and routines (DHVs) do not have a significant effect on your social status/social presence.
Element 2: Social Skills
(Swag Factor/Social Coolness)
Social Skills are your ability to increase or establish your position with the social hierarchy.
While you certainly don't need "elite" social skills, you should be above-average and be able to have and lead a normal conversation with a girl and her friends.
There are two major aspects of Social Skills (Swag Factor/Coolness)-
- Relating to Hot Women on Relative Socially High-Value Subjects
- Small Talk (General Social Skills, Cool Vibe, Comfort Level)
I. Relating to Hot Girls on Relative Socially High-Value Subjects
The measuring stick for "Social Skills," especially how the socially-awkward "authorities" in the PUA community present it, once again- only tells half the story.
The part they focus on is what I call "general small talk," it goes something like this-
after you "create attraction," ask this-
- What is your name? (give your name when she asks you)
- Where are you from? (give your place of birth when she asks you)
- What do you do? (give your occupation when she asks you)
- etc.
If you can ask those questions and give answers back - then you have Social Skills!
Not exactly.
At best, you have the ability to make the "very general small talk," not bad... but no normal human being is going to confuse that with having great Social Skills.
More importantly- only making very general small talk usually won't suggest that you are a cool guy.
True Social Skills run MUCH deeper. But don't think that you have to have great Social Skills. Like Looks, Style, Social Freedom- above-average will suffice.
What is more important is that you can relate to THE GIRLS YOU WANT TO BANG on socially-valuable subjects.
Example 1: Aspiring Actresses/Models
I have a thing for actresses and models... or actually- just HOT girls. Turns out, so many HOT girls in Los Angeles consider themselves actresses or models. Many of them are FAR from it but their backgrounds/goals/lifestyle are almost always similar.
The story is usually the same-
scroll past this if you don't care, it's entertaining though :)
- They aren't usually from Los Angeles.
- They were the HOTTEST girls in their small town, high school, college.
- They were basically "local celebrities" because of it.
- They were told they do could anything they wanted to do in life.
- They moved to Los Angeles and they are scared to death of "not making it."
- They will question if moving to Los Angeles was the right decision.
- Even though they put on a front, they aren't where they want to be in their career.
- They agree that almost everyone in Los Angeles is nice, but they don't have many/any real friends.
- They have a "best friend" in Los Angeles but they don't actually like her that much.
- They miss their real friends.
- Their friends at home are super jealous and living vicariously through them.
- If they had a good relationship with their mother and father- they miss them so much.
- The pressures of looking good gets to them.
- They are living paycheck to paycheck, usually getting financial support of no more than $1500 from their parents.
- Their parents are stressed out because of this.
- They are stressed out because of it.
- They work a job as a waitress, bartender, mall girl, hostess so they can act/model/sing/party.
- They feel guilty for their lifestyle. (this is about 50/50)
- Like me, they don't have a schedule.
- They shop when they get depressed.
- They shop when they are super happy.
- They shop if they have nothing to do.
- They saw another girl earlier that day and thought, "She's so beautiful... She's probably an actress/model... I don't look like her."
- They are starting to consider plastic surgery because they no longer feel hot enough.
- They check to see if there is SPF in their mineral makeup.
- They order the "fat-free" version of everything, which has a ton of sugar in it which is worse for them.
- They don't lift weights at the gym because they think it will turn them into a muscle-bound freak.
- They aren't able to afford the prescription medicines that they need.
- They love to party (first 2.5 years in Los Angeles).
- They call partying "networking," but they know that they are partying and not taking their career as seriously as they should.
- They generally live in a cheap apartment/house room in North Hollywood/Gendale/Studio City aka "The Valley."
- They see the beautiful mansions in Beverly Hills, Bel Air and Agoura Hills and wonder if they'll live there one day or go back home.
- If they go home, they think that everyone will know that they failed.
- They think the guys in Los Angeles are too short.
- They think the guys in Los Angeles (especially the wanna-be actors) have small penises.
- They think "name dropping" is stupid, yet they do it and explain that "it's different" when they do it.
- They actually think social competition is stupid, but they are OBSESSED with it.
- They only smoke when they drink, or at least what they tell guys.
- They smoke light cigarettes because they think they are "better for you."
- They are seeing that Hollywood is a small town.
- They hate drama.
- They live for drama.
- They compare their relationship/hook ups with their friends.
- They have at least 2 gay friends.
- They know that cool people shop at Trader Joe's and not cool people shop at Ralph's/etc.
- They have considered medication for their psychological problems (even if they don't have one).
- They feel like a Hollywood actress in a movie at the club, the finale of being slammed with an endowed dick is storybook for them.
- The majority of the day is spent texting and editing pictures to put up on Facebook or Instagram.
- They love reality TV, E! and Bravo.
- They love Pop Culture.
- They eat Sushi and don't eat 1/2 the rice.
- They carry Splenda in their purse.
- Every 4-5 months they will go to Las Vegas to get away from the "stress" and drama in Los Angeles.
- Every 4-5 months they will go Palm Springs to get away from the "stress" and drama in Los Angeles.
- They just want a cool guy to keep it real with them.
- They are hot and they know it.
I made that list in about 30 minutes. There's a ton more specifics I could give you. That's not really the point though.
The point is- I KNOW THESE GIRLS, I KNOW THEM BETTER THAN THEY KNOW THEMSELVES.
It extends so far beyond "general small talk."
Do you see what I mean?
They are my "target audience."
I can relate to them and understand them on a high level that other guys (and even girls) can't.
Just by understanding their reality it communicates I'm part of the "IN CROWD" and I'm probably cooler than 99% of guys because most guys are outsiders. I can easily talk about the stuff they dig, if I want. I'm not clueless if they say "Alexander McQueen," "Coachella," "Spencer Pratt from the Hills," "Retail Therapy," "Showing my Britney," I know exactly what they are talking about.
Some of these girls CLING ON to guys like me for stability and emotional support. They'll spend 6+ months as a fuckbuddy when they know it's not going anywhere (starting mid 2010- I would actually tell them "this isn't going anyway babe" at 2 months) but they would still come over to my place at regular times every week. I'm able to give them a tremendous amount of emotional support. I'm like a big brother... or even a father... who fucks them.
One super hot Greek actress girl, Alexa, literally had me pick the times that I wanted her to come over and fuck/blow me. She enjoyed it obviously, but she "cherished" the post-orgasm talks that we had. She was really cool. Lexy went back to Connecticut just before 2011.
Like actresses/models, I can relate really well with hot fitness girls and high-status rich girls (who wear those stupid sunglasses, aka ALL OF THEM). I've fucked a lot of those girls too.
In the Los Angeles club scene- You are either part of the In-Crowd (Cool guys, Hot girls) or you are NOT. If you aren't but still hit on lots of women, we call you a "pick up artist."
On the flip-side, I don't like hippie/granola girls. I just don't find them attractive, nor do they like obnoxious-looking clearly-unintelligent steroid-head douchebags like myself. I make absolutely no effort to learn about them or get to know them. I can't relate to them. The average hippie guy has a 1000x better chance at scoring with Miss No-Makeup-Out-Of-Shape-High-Sugar-Conspiracy-Theory-I-Don't-Play-The-Social-Competition-Game-Cause-I-Cant-Win-Granola Girl than I do. Sorry, just keeping it real.
Scotty digs Black and Latina girls. He has an excellent read on them and can get them even better than Black or Latino guys.
Even though they may have good Social Freedom, a lot of guys are stuck because they don't have any idea what HOT girls are all about in this stage of their life. For a lot of guys, their "target audience" (in general: HOT girls) are like an "alien" to them. They might as well be from another planet. Even with canned lines and staged routines, it's like they are speaking to an alien life form.
The point is- know your target audience. Know what makes them tick. Know them so well that you are literally a part of their crowd.
"What are you doing... Shopping for shoes or something?" (my line)
They get it. In 20 seconds they know that I'm one of them.
In the video below, I'm talking to this ex-model girl.
There are several points in the video where it's clear that I "understand" her life and communicate that I can relate. It's not so much of a "DHV" thing, it just shows that I'm part of the "in crowd" among her type-
6:15 - I comment that NYU is a prestigious school.
7:10 - I talk about how the NYU (urban, NYC) non-campus college experience is totally different any most universities.
7:26 - I ask her if she was overwhelmed by New York City. (most new NYC girls call their parents every day and cry)
7:35 - I tell her about my experience in the dorms and most girls have no place to put all their clothing. (girls in NYC constantly complain about this)
7:45 - I ask her if some rich guy paid for her condo. (this happens a lot in LA/NY/Miami, rich guys give hot girls rent so they can fuck them)
8:00 - She says that I'm an "LA Guy," which I am. So she has caught my vibe and digs it, "...that's not a bad thing."
8:15 - I go back to the Jersey Shore pop-culture reference and call myself out on begin a douchebag.
10:50 - I tell her to cancel her ride and we'll buy her friend "appetizers." (In LA especially, girls meet up with their friends and only order appetizers because they are cheap and have less calories"
II. Small Talk (General Social Skills, Cool Vibe, Comfort Level)
While "relating to" your target audience on their favorite 'high-value' subjects runs pretty deep, the "small talk" (the part that PUA community calls "Social Skills") is pretty basic.
You basically need to be able to lead an average conversation with a cool, confident vibe.
That shows that you are at least- not weird.
Cool guys can make (and lead) basic conversations with other guys on masculine subjects such as sports, money, girls, cars, etc.
Cool guys can make (and lead) basic conversations with hot girls on subjects that relate to the girls lives.
Remember-
Cool Is A Vibe, Not A Resume
Cool is a demeanor, often meaning laid-back but in control. Sometimes called "Chill."
This is communicated through your body language and your ability to BE YOURSELF, just as if you were in the comfort of your own home.
Some guys have heard that being "cool" means you're well-rounded, such as- you've traveled to different cities, you can speak different languages or your have neat hobbies.
It doesn't. Not exactly.
Mr. Above-Average Gets Mad Pussy
If you have above-average Looks, Style, Social Freedom, Swag Factor and can play the numbers game aggressively- you aren't just "above-average" you are probably top 1-2%. Very few guys can.
Remember- the average guy is overweight (USA), wears nice guy boring clothes, doesn't speak to women and has a 5.5" penis. It doesn't take much to beat him.
I saw something the other day that misrepresented/mistook our stuff, it read-
GLL Says-
"To get the hottest girls, you have to be an elite guy across the board! Makes sense!"
This is false.
You have to have above-average-
- Looks
- Style
- Social Freedom
- Swag
... and play the numbers game (hit on 20-30 hot girls a week).
That's the complete formula to get a consistent supply of hot, yummy, happy pussy.
You don't have be to the "total package," you don't have to be the "dream guy" or some sort of "super hero."
You'll have to have certain lifestyle factors together if you want to retain these girls for extended periods of time, but you definitely don't have to be much better than above-average.
With that said- you should strive to be elite. But try to do it for yourself, not for pussy.
Help! I Realize I Have No Swag! What Do I Do?
Just like you've developed your Looks, Style and Social-Freedom- Swag Factor can be developed.
Homie- Unfortunately, that will be a topic for another time. This article is already 4600+ words deep.
This one slightly gets into it from my experience-
"Swag Factor: The Missing Piece to Getting Consistent Top-Shelf Pussy" (Video 3/3)
This is some of my very best stuff, I suggest you watch these videos.
Give yourself a whole week to read/watch this discussion.
--- RELATED TOPICS ---
"That Girl": Night Game for Socially-Competitive Hot Club Girls (Related Topic)
At ALL nightclubs and almost all bars, the social competition game is in full-effect. The game is most often played by women. It's their "night game."
You know how people say, "She's just out for attention."? It's true. The vast majority of women go to clubs strictly for attention. Regardless if we think that is completely superficial, people have egos and they like to feel good about themselves.
The competition is individual but it can certainly be a team sport too.
Especially at night clubs, girls love being the "hottest girls" in the club. They want the most glances. They want the most free drinks. They want to be the best dressed. If a competing group is getting more attention than their team, they will call the other girls "sluts" and talk about how they are "wearing too much makeup," and make fun of the guys that approach their rivals. They want to take hot pictures to post on Facebook, where they are just a "lil' bit" hotter than their friends. While they seemingly dislike it when undesirable guys approach them, they actually like it. They want stories to tell about "that creepy" guy that tried to dance with them. They love to get asked for their number. They cockblock for each other, until guys with equal or higher status join their group. They want to be invited to the VIP section. They want to drink alcohol from the various tables and leave the guys nothing but the bill. They go to the bathroom to look at themselves and get compliments from other girls on their hair, dress, shoes, etc. Even the least superficial girls get wrapped up in the competition; no girl likes it when another girl is getting all the guys.
The goal is to command the most attention with their sexual presence. The girl(s) that gets the most- wins.
What a brutal awful sport.
It is what it is though. Be glad you are a guy; they are ultimately playing their little game for you... if you have Social Status.
If you want to fuck them- it's important that you understand the behavior of hot club girls. I understand these girls inside-out. I'll even tell them that I use my Social Status to get the same shit that they're after (free drinks, attention, free cigarettes, VIP/table, guys trying to talk to me, etc.). On some nights it's true, on other nights I'm just fucking with them. While that seem likes a "DHV" technique, either way- they believe me and I look the part (douchebag) and they assume that I'm super high status... which ironically- I am if I'm having a good night.
As always, you are free to comment and ask questions.
Since I'm mad busy these days, I sometimes won't be able to answer your questions right away. I'll try my best.
If you have an elaborate or several questions, I suggest you ask in the forum, you'll get a much quicker response in there.
 Defined; The Missing Piece For Hot Pussy v1.0)
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