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It's funny, some guys (not the guys in the Good Looking Loser community) tell me stories that go something like this, "...then she fucked my brains out," "...she pinned me down on the bed," and "...she ripped me clothes off," and obviously- I know they are lying.
Girls are not naturally dominant.
They don't like to be because they no longer feel feminine and sexy.
Plus most girls (especially the hottest chicks) would have no idea how to do it if they wanted to.
Girls like to be submissive because they feel feminine and sexy.
Girls like to get fucked by a dominant, alpha male.
Sometimes there are random cougars that like to be the aggressor, but that's not the majority (maybe 1%) and even still- those women might still probably prefer a nice alpha bang with a sexy dominant male.
So you get it- its up to YOU to dominate her. You're the dominate male. She's the submissive female.
For most guys (I don't have a percentage) they understand this, even if their actions in bed don't totally reflect it. For the most part, however, guys don't have any issues with being the dominant one in the bedroom. Most guys stick their dick in and bang away. That's usually a good time for the guy and girl.
Some guys, myself included, sometimes like to be submissive to female in the bedroom. I think a lot of guys would embrace this role (sometimes) if they knew how to do it.
The key to understand is- in order for this to work, you are actually being dominant (telling the girl what to do for your pleasure) and not actually being totally submissive. You still take the lead but you sit back and let things unfold.
This is what we call- Role Play.
It's not that hard, but the average guy usually can't pull it off that well without fully understanding how to make it happen and their role in this process.
Another key to understand is- in order to do this frequently, for this to work well and and not fuck up the sexual dynamic in the bedroom, the girl MUST already view you as a dominant alpha male. She won't enjoy being dominant if you are a submissive male in real life. She'll enjoy it if she knows she's pleasuring an alpha male.
If you screen and are are aggressive (sexually-charged dialogue + physical advances) on approach, she'll know if are an alpha male. If you are aggressive in the bedroom, this will be reinforced. So long as you establish this, you shouldn't have any trouble if you tell the girl, for example, "sit on my face, tell me to eat your asshole," "I'm going to get on my knees and eat your pussy while you look at your sexy body in the mirror, comb your thick beautiful hair, smoke a cigarette and blow your stinky smoke down at me."
In those two examples (yeah, I've done those obviously), you dominantly tell the girl what to do. Since she wants to pleasure you, she'll be happy to do it and she'll probably like it.
If you are a submissive male (in real life) those scenarios will reinforce that you are a total pussy. Not good. Your girl will eventually leave (or withhold sex and desire) a real man.
It doesn't take much to establish a dominant sexual dynamic in the bedroom that can allow you to incorporate some submissive role play scenarios. Simply banging the girl really hard works great. Telling the girl "on your knees" and stuffing your cock in her mouth establishes your dominance. If you have a big dick, comparing the girl's arms, wrist and hands to your large penis sets up a powerful "endowed and proud" frame. Even just saying, "I'm going to put on some music, dance for me," is a good start. So long as your are embracing your role in the bedroom as the dominant male- you should be fine.
If you are new to this and have some wild/really submissive role play scenario in mind, you can take baby steps toward it. This works good because both you and her will seemingly "naturally" ease into it.
For example, if you are sleeping with a girl with a nice FIT bubble butt and want her to sit and wiggle her tushy on your face while you submissively lick it, you can lead up to it (either that night, or over multiple nights).
Step 1 could be- simply massaging her ass, compliment her ass.
Step 2 could be- lightly kissing her ass and telling her it has amazing power over you.
Step 3 could be- TELLING HER to get in the 69-position and her blow you.
Step 4 could be- you licking her pussy from the 69 position.
Step 5 could be- licking her asshole from the 69-position.
Step 6 could be- TELLING HER to ignore your cock for a minute, put her ass in the air, shake it proudly, and slowly lower her asshole over your face. From there just enjoy her bubble butt and command her to "GRIND YOUR ASS ON MY FACE" or "Wiggle your beautiful ass."
Baby Steps or "Sit on my face."
This is all dominant stuff, even though this specific role play is submissive.
This discussion is aimed at creating 'submissive' role play scenarios but it can be applied to certain fetish stuff too (I'll probably talk about this in another post). This is basically "Femdom" fetish/role play anyway.
Submissive CEOs Routine
When I'm on meetups "dates" with girls I like to talk about sex. With physical escalation, it sets the table for what we'll be doing later. If I want to be submissive in the bedroom that night (I don't usually want to with a new girl) I also like to screen/introduce the matter. Here is the routine that I use:
I tell the girl, "Did you know that 90% of CEOs of big Fortune 500 companies say that they actually like to be submissive in bed? I thought it was kinda weird at first. But It kinda makes sense, these guys are powerful men with tons of authority and money. They push people around all day long and are so used to that. So it makes sense if they get turned from dominant female role play. It's just role play, they are probably dominant men in real life. I used to think it was weird, but I totally understand it now. What do you think about it?"
Usually I won't discuss it too much further, unless the girl is big time into it. Later, I'll just tell her what to do in the bedroom if I want to be submissive. It's a nice way to open the door to role play.
1) Establish an alpha male frame in and out of the bedroom.
2) Tell (DO NOT ASK) the girl EXACTLY what to do or use baby steps. Remember- It's dominant role play.
You've thought about it long enough.
Appreciate it man! For some guys it's 'too much' haha
Now this is LEGIT! NEVER ASK(unless shes in an emotionally heated State.....DEMAND IT !!!!--- if ur not used to it at first.. which for most guys it will be tha case.. yull probably feel anxious/nervous/uncomfortable etc.....just continue to...
Now this is LEGIT! NEVER ASK(unless shes in an emotionally heated State.....DEMAND IT !!!!--- if ur not used to it at first.. which for most guys it will be tha case.. yull probably feel anxious/nervous/uncomfortable etc.....just continue to apply it over & over (Exposure Therapy).....Cause this stuff Chris is writing about isnt STRICTLY used for Sex/Fetishes......this stuff will Help your OVERALL game in all Aspects of life.....Becoming a Dominant Alpha Man(project strength to Avoid Conflict)co-workers,associates,partners,fuck buddies, girl friends, wives, screening girls!!! Goddammint!!!
This is spot on!! I was just searching around for stuff about how to be more of a dominatrix for my bf who's into being dominated sometimes...but realise - thanks to you - I don't need to. My bf is pure sexy alpha male and always tells me (in...
This is spot on!! I was just searching around for stuff about how to be more of a dominatrix for my bf who's into being dominated sometimes...but realise - thanks to you - I don't need to. My bf is pure sexy alpha male and always tells me (in exactly the way you describe) how we're gonna play things. And it's true - even though I like to be a feminine sub in the bedroom - the times we 'switch roles' at his command, it's always hot and sexy because he is still being dominant. The other sites I found on my search aren't wasted as it's given me some useful tips (and it means I can surprise him with a few kinky ideas and moves of my own) but your article has really taken the pressure off, and makes me realise that what we currently do, and how he gets me to do it, is all good....which I guess is obvious from the fact that we always enjoy ourselves so much. Thanks!!
Hey thanks Lindsey! I don't view the other sites, but their articles are generally written by guys that aren't sexually active (they just like to write or something) so the advice they give should be dismissed. It's actually dangerous if you...
Hey thanks Lindsey! I don't view the other sites, but their articles are generally written by guys that aren't sexually active (they just like to write or something) so the advice they give should be dismissed. It's actually dangerous if you think about it, giving relationship/sex advice to couples is actually a big deal... bad advice could screw stuff up. Thank you again for your thoughts
[...] to embrace role play and sexual fetishism, here’s a discussion on Femdom related role play “How To Get Your Chick to Be Dominant In Bed,” the mindset and techniques in this discussion can be applied universally to all types of role...
[...] to embrace role play and sexual fetishism, here’s a discussion on Femdom related role play “How To Get Your Chick to Be Dominant In Bed,” the mindset and techniques in this discussion can be applied universally to all types of role [...]
I didn't think the "Get Hung" guide would have girls eyeing my bulge. It did.
I didn't think that your exercise and diet advice would have girls checking me out. It did.
I DEFINITELY didn't think that your hair-loss prevention would fix my hairline. Not in a billion years. It mother fucking did. You saved me a crazy amount of time, a ton of money, unnecessary pain, and destroyed my #1 source of anxiety. DESTROYED IT.
Kratom is next!
To anyone reading this, follow through, read this material, APPLY this material, and enjoy life.
Thanks again Chris, life would suck without you.
comment 26220 - "How to Pickup Girls if You Are Nervous... (Nervous Guy Game)"