What Exactly is Kratom?
(Good Looking Loser's Guide to Kratom 2.0 - Part I)

December 2016 update:

I have modified and reposted our legendary Guide to Kratom.

The original version was written by Rooster and myself.

The Good Looking Loser community has done a tremendous amount to keep the world's greatest, little-known herb legal.

At least temporarily, for the first time in American drug policy history, we got the DEA to reconsider their ban.

Thank you for you have been part of this effort. 

If you've never heard of Kratom, you might be in for a life-changer. 


Why I Recommend Kratom
(A Message From Chris)

Kratom is my #1 recommendation on all of Good Looking Loser.

I have used Kratom 5 or 6 times everyday for the past 6+ years.

I credit Kratom for helping me to accomplish just about everything I've achieved in the past 6 years.

Kratom has BY FAR made the biggest impact on my life out of ANY SINGLE COMPOUND. That includes anabolic steroids, for which I have over a decade of experience with.

There are tens of thousands of people that feel the same way, for a variety of reasons.

Unlike many natural dietary supplements that do nothing, Kratom can seriously help anxiety, depression, addiction, motivation, sleep, etc.

The versatility of this magical plant is truly incredible.

While it won't work equally as well for everyone, but a lot of people are going to be really impressed by this magical powder.

In full transparency, Happy Hippo (recommended vendor) is my store.

It is the EXACT same product I have used everyday for the past 6 years and is much better than the low-quality Kratom available in local smokeshops and elsewhere.

I fully believe in our Happy Hippo Kratom product and think everyone should try it.

There will be a period of trial and error to figure what types and amounts work best for you.

Most people will like it.

Many people will ABSOLUTELY LOVE it.

Some will be non-responders or not like it.

I'm hoping you will LOVE it as much as I do.

- Chris (Good Loooking Loser)


Table of Contents

You can view the index here -

Kratom Leaf

What is Kratom?

What you should know about God's plant.

Kratom or "Mitragyna Speciosa" is a plant native to Indonesia, Malaysia and Thailand.

Kratom has been used safely for centuries in Southeast Asia.

It is often consumed as tea or beverage. 

Currently, in the USA, Kratom has no official status, we are hoping it receives 'dietary supplement' status, just as it is in Canada. 

Since Kratom is so effective against many ailments, big pharmaceutical companies want it banned or the exclusive rights to patent and sell it.  

Kratom powder

What Does Kratom Do?

Kratom is the most versatile herb ever, even moreso than Cannabis.

There's several different "strains" or types of Kratom.

They are all a little different, but in general -

Kratom helps reduce pain, anxiety, depression.

It increases motivation, focus and energy.

It is even effective against restless leg syndrome, insomnia and addiction. 

Today, I personally use Kratom for sense of well-being, motivation and focus.

Back in my "let's meet a lot of girls" days, I used Kratom for it's mood, pro-social effects and hardcore gym workouts.


How Does Kratom Work?
(Is it Safe?)

Kratom works by stimulating your opiate receptors. 

It has 'opiate-like' effects. 

However - Kratom is NOT an opiate.

A little science lesson -

Traditional "opiates", like Percocet and Vicodin, are derived from morphine and work on μ-opioid [mu] receptors. The mu receptors cause considerable amounts of euphoria, pain relief and are very prone to addiction and dependency. 

Kratom, by contrast, is ''7-hydroxymitragynine" (not morphine) and works largely on the secondary "Delta" and "Kappa" opiate receptors.

The Delta and Kappa opiate receptors are considerably less prone to addiction, dependency and respiratory side effects.

Compared to pharmaceutical opiates and illicit drugs like heroin, which all work on the mu opiate receptors, Kratom (Kappa/Opiate receptor agonist) is far more mild.

Kratom can produce a 'sense of well-being' but doesn't give any long lasting intense euphoria. 

This is what makes Kratom far safer than all other "opiates" that are addicting and subject to overdose.

That is why Kratom can be a lifesaving compound for opiate addicts, allowing them to wean off hardcore drugs and still feel a sense of well-being without a vicious withdrawal.

Kratom can also be is a life-changing compound for people with depression that don't like or didn't respond favorably to SSRIs.

There have NEVER been any deaths solely attributed to Kratom.

It is impossible overdose on Kratom, in a traditional "take too much and die" sense. Kratom cannot not suppress your breathing (respiratory function) because it largely avoid the mu opiate receptors.

If you take too much Kratom, you will feel woozy, sleepy and at worst - feel like throwing up. 

That is the extent of a "Kratom overdose".

Less "lethal" than alcohol and even Tylenol - which kills almost 1000 people a year.

There are different types (strains) of Kratom and each produces it's own unique blend of effects. We will discuss this later.


What is "The Kratom Lifestyle"?

Throughout this guide we will use the term "Kratom Lifestyle".

Rooster and I coined this term. 

Simply put -

Kratom Lifestyle refers to those who use Kratom everyday. 

Using Kratom daily is certainly a "lifestyle". 

There is productive and correct way to do it (use a different type of Kratom everyday) and a not-as-productive way to do it.

You definitely don't have to use Kratom on a daily basis. But unlike other compounds, if you use it correctly, you can avoid side effects, dependency and general tolerance.


What Are the Different Types of Kratom?

There are numerous different Kratom strains. 

While many are similar, they are slightly different and you should eventually learn the differences so you can maximize the potential.

Let's talk about the different varieties and an easy way to figure out what works best for you.

Before we begin, please listen -



Kratom "Speed" Effects?

For simplicity, we separate the different varieties of Kratom into 3 categories.

Fast – Moderate – Slow

This is the best way understand and classify the different varieties - 

Fast Kratom (usually from Thailand or Maeng Da strains) is largely for energy, physical labor and pro-social behavior. It is ideal for going to the gym or going to social events. 

Slow Kratom (usually Kratom from Bali/Horned strains) is largely used for achieving a sense of well-being, anti-anxiety or pain relief. 

Moderate Kratom (usually Kratom from Indonesia/Malaysia/Vietnam) is somewhere in the middle with all these effects.

Kratom "Location" Effects?

Certain locations tend to produce leaves that have similar effects.

Thailand – Indonesia – Malaysia – Borneo

There are exceptions to these rules, it will vary from person-to-person. 

Kratom "Color" Effects?

Some people prefer to distinguish Kratom and the likely effects by color.

Red - White - Green - Yellow

I don't prefer this classification because there's too many exceptions in my personal experience.

I will mention it anyway -

Red and Yellow vein Kratom is generally thought of as "slow" (sense of well-being, anti-anxiety, pain relief).

Green vein Kratom is generally thought of as "fast" or "moderate" (productivity, motivation, pro-social).

White vein Kratom is generally thought of as "moderate" with balanced effects.

Again, I prefer my "Kratom speed" classification simply because I feel it's more accurate for myself and the 10,000+ of people I've introduced to Kratom.

I concede, however, that the "Kratom color" classification seems to hold true for some people. 

The "fast, moderate, slow" and "red/green/yellow/white" breakdown doesn't always apply in real-time.

For example -

Some people who are naturally prone to anxiety often find that certain "slow" strains give them energy.

Some very extroverted people find "fast" strains are best for anxiety, instead of physical or social activity.


Now I'm Totally Confused! Help!

If you are a newbie, the most important thing to remember is -


The speed, location and color classification mainly applies if you are follow a "Kratom Lifestyle" and need rotate different types of Kratom based on your agenda for the day.


Here is how you figure out what will work best for you -

The only way to learn and improve your Kratom IQ is to try the different types, in different amounts, in different situations. 

While that seems like a pain -

Kratom trial and error is blast. 

Start with smaller amounts (3-5 grams), wait 30 minutes and only take more if you don't feel anything.

Sometimes it will be good.

Sometimes it will be great.

You'll figure it out!


Good Kratom vs. Bad Kratom

The last thing I want to mention is -

There is a HUGE DIFFERENCE in the quality between different Kratom vendors.

Your experience will almost reflect the quality of leaf you have.

A lot of people try Kratom from a random inexpensive headshop, end up disappointed and completely dismiss the leaf.


Get quality Kratom or no Kratom at all.

Again, Happy Hippo is my store, but there's a reason that we have made well over 50,000 sales and 50% of the sales are Happy returning customers. 

If you have further questions, please post your questions in our Kratom forum .
(we are happy to answer whatever questions you may have)