Relax, Partna

Picking up girls can be nerve-wracking

Especially if you've never walked up to a girl that you want to bang, and especially if she is with other girls and guys.

It was really scary for me when I got started.

Keep in mind, most guys, don't approach girls on a daily basis.

At best, most guys walk into a bar, take lap around, stare at a few girls and get a few drinks. This continues a few more times as their approach anxiety builds up. About an hour or less before closing time, they make their move and throw some sloppy game at 1 or 2 chicks. Their night ends having talked to maybe 1 to 2 girls, if any at all. Even fewer guys approach girls during the day. That was pretty much how my night went before I stopped being a pussy.

And That's just some guys - the majority of guys don't approach women at all.

So if you're your approaching girls during the day or at night before you start drinking, you're showing more social courage than the vast majority of guys. That's a good start and something to build on.

A big problem I've seen is that guys take this stuff way too seriously and it definitely is not fun for them. They are super serious about improving their sex life and banging girls, that they can't relax when they are going out. For starters, they are trying to get every girl to like them rather than screening the girls that they are interested in.

When I was first starting out, I would take it way too seriously. I would sit in my room thinking about lines and different stuff to do in certain situations. I would then listen to music and have some long process of dressing up and getting ready. Basically, I would psych myself out before I even started. I didn't realize this until I seemed to be way better at picking up girls at the gym, when I looked like a sweaty mess. Once I lost the 'pre-game' rituals and just started talking to more girls during the day, at night, anytime - I stopped taking it too seriously.

Picking up girls can become way too serious because it's unnatural for most guys. It's something that "they do" not something that "they are". The 5 or 10 girls they talk to on any given Saturday night  are the only girls they are going to talk to all week. They will have a week to think about every interaction and what went good and bad with it. Each interaction is super important to them, even though it doesn't really matter.

I say- don't give yourself time to think about it, talk to more girls. Immediately.

Relax. You'll Eventually Get Pussy Audio

00:00 - Relax pep-talk
00:45 - Picking up chicks can be nerve-wracking
01:45 - If you need help killing your anxiety check out: Get Relaxed (Anti Anxiety) Supplements
02:30 - The majority of guys hardly approach girls
03:00 - Chris' stupid rituals before going out hurt his game
04:00 - Chris realized he was being an idiot when he was easily able to pick up girls at the gym when he was mess
06:15 - You only need 1 chick to get laid
06:55 - This is a numbers game: Talk to Chicks + Be Aggressive = Get Laid
08:00 - Girls want to meet an alpha male that fucks them silly, not a timid nice guy
08:45 - Want to increase your odds? Talk to more girls


Getting Laid is Like Selling a House (but way easier)

Rather than telling you generic useless bullshit like "Be confident," or "Don't care what other people think," I'm going to tell you to something else pretty cheesy, "Getting laid is like selling a house (but way easier) - you only need 1 buyer."

You're chances improve every time you talk to a new girl. Your chances also improve the more aggressive you are.

If you are approaching girls, screening them and filtering out the incompatible girls - you are getting closer and closer to finding a cool, sexually available chick.

Here's exactly what I'm talking about-

One night in April 2009 I was at the Standard Hotel in West Hollywood. I think I had gotten to the point where I was texting with too many girls and didn't exactly want to take anymore phone numbers. In about 60 minutes I had walked up to about 14 girls, screened them, got into a few meaningless conversations and had a couple boring girls get lost. Either way, the fish weren't biting. I knew that my screening process worked and I wasn't going to start getting down on myself or change my game just to stay in conversations with some girls. Eventually some new girls came in the bar. I went up to the hottest one. I grabbed her arm and told her that she needed to be my bodyguard since she looked like she could beat people up (remember I'm 6-2 225lbs). She laughed and just said "I like you." I immediately took her to a place to sit down and did small talk while I touched her arms, then legs, then neck. I danced her a few times (really threw her around and pulled her hair). Turns out this girl, Sydney, was on America's Next Top Model, she was with some friends but she walked to the Standard since her apartment was in walking distance. I saw she had cigarettes in her purse and told her that I'd give her a piggy-back ride if she gave me one. She laughed and I gave her a piggy-back ride right out of the bar. It was actually nice outside so I told her lets go for a walk and come back. I started walking to my place which was about 3 blocks away. As we were walking to the house I made sure to heat her up, I'd stop and pin her against a wall and kiss her, I'd touch her when we walked by a dark area. Once we got to the driveway I told her, "oh that's my place, lets have a drink so we don't have to pay at the bar." I took her in the house, threw her on my bed, took off my shirt and hers and pounded her. Afterward, I remember Sydney kept telling me how "spontaneous" it was and how awesome it was. Little did she know that I had the whole thing pretty much all planned. I was just one step ahead of her.

This all happened in about an hour, I never forgot it and I think of this any time "the fish aren't biting." It's just a matter of time and staying positive. This was a sexy, somewhat shy, high fashion girl, nothing about this girl said "slut."


Eventually you'll run into a similar result. If 14 girls are boring or unresponsive to you, its likely that you'll have a live one in the next few girls to hit on. If anything, your odds are improving. Don't change your game - keep being aggressive. You are trying to get laid, not have go-nowhere conversations or make friends.

Remember- it's harder to get laid than to have meaningless conversations or to just give up. See if you can hang in there and stick to your guns. You just have to get 1 girl to get laid. You don't and shouldn't be trying to get every girl.

It will help you internalize the "Get Laid or Get Lost" mentality that will make you tougher psychologically and you get more chicks than you can handle.

Numbers Game

Getting laid is a numbers game. Do not let ANYONE tell you otherwise. If someone tells you that getting laid/dating isn't a numbers game - they are either lying or they don't get laid.

The more chicks you hit on, the more chicks you'll get.

It's a numbers game and that's a good thing.

The issue is not up for discussion.

Getting laid is simply about finding a ready and willing girls among the crowd. Getting laid is a number's game and you only need 1 girl to be sexually available and sexually interested in you. Chances are - you'll have to talk to and screen a bunch of girls to find a buyer. This is one of the things that elite players know (and act on) that the average guy doesn't.

While getting laid involves skill, it also involves 2 elements that are out of your control: you need a girl that is sexually available and is able to leave with you (more about the 2rd element here: _________).

As mentioned earlier, you can't control if a girl is happily married, loyally engaged or loves her boyfriend. Although some people like the idea of being girlfriend stealers, I say - don't waste your time - find a girl that is sexually available that doesn't require you to work on her for hours. If they are in a relationship and give you obvious hints that they are sexually available, then that is a different story.

You also can't control if a girl doesn't have favorable 'logistics' or has prior social commitments and isn't able to leave the place with you. She may be the designated driver of a group, she may be leaving early because she has to wake up in the morning or she may live far away. It is important to figure out a girl's 'logistics,' how she got there, who she's with and how she's getting home (for techniques see: logistics). Not every girl stays until close or is able to bounce with you. In those cases, there are some alternative places to try and get busy with her - if you want.

Increase your odds

It may seem obvious - to increase your odds, you simply need to aggressively hit on more girls. If you want to get laid and usually talk to 2 girls a night - if you talk to 4 girls a night instead, you've just increased your chances 100%. If you talk to 10 girls, you've increased your chances by 500%. Every girl you screen out, you're closer to finding a buyer. Remember that. Don't stop when you've screened out 10 or 15 girls, if anything - you should aggressively continue.

A lot of people try other things to increase their odds - buying a new shirt, different cologne, learning new lines, etc.

While those things can help, they are generally unproductive if you don't hit on a lot of girls to begin with.

Hitting on more girls is the best way to increase your odds.

Who had the better night?

Guy #1) Talked to 10 hot girls with "nice guy" material, didn't get rejected once, got 3 phone numbers, left with his friends.

Guy #2) Talked to 10 hot girls with "aggressive" material, got rejected 9 times, got no phone numbers, left with the 10th girl he approached and plowed her.

Guy #2 had the better night - by far.

So just relax - it's a numbers game out there. Even when you get good with this stuff. The more chicks you talk to, the better your chances are of getting laid. The more aggressive you are, the better your chances are of getting laid. That's the deal. And Once you really believe this, the game is actually in your favor if you think about it - you are not getting laid, in a slump or just broke up with your girlfriend and want to get laid - just talk to more girls. Once you know what you're doing, you won't ever feel like your just "getting lucky" again.

If you have any questions or comments, definitely don't hesitate to post below.