How to Lose Your Virginity
For some of you, this will be the most important post you ever read.
Losing your virginity is literally your first step to having a sex life, ending a lifelong sexual 'slump', moving past years of frustration, underachievement and self-loathing that extends to several other areas of your life.
For some of you guys - this will be the start of a REALLY GOOD sex life.
For others - it will simply be validation that you can Get Laid and you can move on with your life.
I take this privilege to tell you how to do it - very seriously.
If you follow what I tell you - you will not be a virgin any longer.
There is a structured guide and program that expands on this guide that is available here -
- "How to Get Laid in 5 Weeks (Even If You Are a Virgin)"
(this is discussed in Part V)
Forward by Good Looking Loser
In this series, "How to Lose Your Virginity", I'm going to give you a step-by-step process to lose your V-Card that won't be too hard on your self-esteem.
In fact -
You will not be cold-approaching any girls.
If you are a virgin/inexperienced and think your odds are higher (or you are more of a "player") by wandering around by yourself, indiscriminately mass approaching women and somehow fearlessly pulling them back to your house within an hour to have sex - by all means, go do that.
That is not what I recommend.
The vast majority of guys who [try to] take that approach end up not getting any pussy, are totally deflated, and end up on an Internet forum talking about how they hate women/pick up artists, or are still searching for top secret methods to improve their "game".
I have a different way.
Listen to me.
Before get into the "how-to", we have some things we need to discuss.
I Know Why You Are Here
Unless you are super new to GoodLookingLoser.com, you probably saw (and voted) in last month's poll -
After looking at a detailed report of the statistics, the actual percentage is about 35% (some people voted multiple times), nonetheless - a significant part of our community is here to do ONE THING -
LOSE THEIR VIRGINITY.
I've known this for a long time (although I figured it was more like 15-20%) and that is why I push Online Dating and boring (but tremendously effective) approaches such as "Basic Guy Game" and "Nervous Guy Game" that nobody likes.
Most of you guys have no business trying to be aggressive with girls. Not yet.
The Main Problem Preventing Most Guys From Getting Laid
After working with guys in-person years ago, getting feedback from Brian's (Scotty) workshops, reading threads on our forum, and spending years around the pick up community - I figured out the BIGGEST PROBLEM that most virgins are facing.
It has nothing to do with 'Approach Anxiety'.
(you can have a decent sex life without ever cold-approaching girls)
It has nothing to do with "game".
(you don't need good "game" to Get Laid either; plenty of guys sleep with girls without much "game")
Believe it or not, it doesn't usually have anything to do with 'looks' (appearance) or even social skills (Swag Factor).
Even though virgins/inexperienced guys tend to have approach anxiety and are often overweight/underweight with below-average social skills -
None of those fixable factors are the main issue that is preventing them from Getting Laid.
The problem lies in the 'Sense of Entitlement' sphere.
(it's a specific element of 'Confidence')
Hear me out.
A lack of a 'Sense of Entitlement' is what separates the guys that hook up with above-average girls and the guys that hook up with the hottest girls.
But it also separates most virgins from the average guy who has already slept with a few women.
Virgins and inexperienced guys, consciously or subconsciously - do not feel like they deserve pussy.
This might not be obvious in safe day-to-day interactions but it really rears its effects whenever they see/like a girl that might actually like them back.
When they get a girl's phone number, hear that a girl likes them, consider starting a "more than friends" conversation or actually start getting busy with a girl - they find some excuse (pussy out) in order to avoid potential disappointment or rejection.
(It is displayed in many forms including: "I don't know what to say...", "She's not my type...", "What do I do next?" or "She's probably a prude/slut")
Self-sabotage/not trying almost always traces back to a lack of Sense of Entitlement.
Often combined with having higher standards than they can [currently] fulfill - it leads to a non-existent sex life.
(For good Looking guys - unreachable standards are the main problem)
Many quietly analyze their life and tell themselves a complicated story about how they are 'special', 'different' and often 'more intelligent' than normal humans, and decide that a vibrant sex life is just not something that is meant to be.
In order to make it less painful, most do not try to pursue women.
THIS CYCLE WILL REPEAT ITSELF - FOR YEARS.
That's what has been happening to a lot of you guys.
I've seen it more times than I can count.
We are going to try and break this silent self-loathing cycle as soon as possible.
What You Need to Remember To Beat This Problem
It is super important to break this defeatist cycle that repeats itself anytime you consider taking things further with girl.
I'm not one for 'affirmations' (mainly because I haven't seen them to be too effective when it comes to Getting Laid), so I'm just going to give you some UNDENIABLE TRUTHS for you to remember instead of thinking about the default "I'm a Virgin"/"Girls Just Don't Like Me" cycle that sabotages your chances with women and extends into everything you dream about doing.
What I'm about to tell you won't instantly give you a strong 'Sense of Entitlement' (you have to gain the experience) but it will help to remind yourself of these things on a daily basis when you meet girls, right up until you have sex -
A Guy Who is More Ugly Than You Are - Got Laid Last Night
(A Guy Who Sucks More Than You Do Got Laid Last Night, etc.)
A guy who is uglier/suckier than you are shared an orgasm with girl while you were "doing research" on the Internet to try and figure out what is wrong with you.
I have an entire post on this -
You can't deny it.
You know it's true.
Maybe it's common sense but you probably don't think about it this way.
You choose to beat yourself up and make ridiculous generalizations that "no girl" likes you.
Mr. Uglier-Than-You-Are-Guy might not have aggressively picked up a super hot girl at a bar or club. But some girl found him attractive/not-sucky enough to take off her clothes, expose her vulnerability/pussy and allow him to put his average dick inside of her. They cuddled and told secrets to each other afterwards.
How did he do this?
At some point in time, usually slowly and awkwardly - he expressed interest in the girl and she expressed that she felt the same way. Usually in a similar shy fashion.
After weeks of hanging out and going a little further each time - they had sex.
And they have been doing it ever since.
Good Looking Losers (Guys on This Site)
Compared to the "pick up community" at-large, a lot of our members are quite good looking.
For 99% of you guys (overweight guys excluded) - being "not good looking enough" or "not cool enough" is simply a convenient excuse to stay a virgin and avoid potential disappointment.
True - you have to be above-average looking/cool (have above-average sex appeal) to be a cold approach "all-star" and bat high percentages (7-15%) with the hottest, most popular girls.
But by no means do you have to be good looking to get action.
At the very least, you stand a chance with every 'single-and-looking' girl that is equal or less attractive than you are - regardless of how much 'anxiety' you have.
You might not get them in bed the first night (you won't), but don't think that they wouldn't want to fuck you and tell their friends.
The good news is - you are a guy.
So you won't be entirely judged on solely your 'looks'.
(which you can improve)
While we singled out "looks" (sex appeal) the topic could have also been -
- A Guy Who is Shorter Than You Are - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy With Less Social Status Than You Have - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy Who has Less Hair Than You Have - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy Who has a Smaller Dick Than You Have - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy Who is Not as Cool As You Are - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy Who is Older/Younger Than You Are - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy Who is a Minority, Just Like You Are/Aren't - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy With More Anxiety Than You Have - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy Who has Less Money Than You/Your Family Has - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy Who is More/Less Intelligent Than You Are - Got Laid Last Night
- A Guy With Less "Game" Than You Have - Got Laid Last Night
Get my point?
It's time to stop solely blaming your appearance (or whatever other perceived weakness) for your lack of experience.
Your lack of effort is mainly to blame.
You aren't trying to meet girls or you are using low-odds, often deflating methods (such as cold approach) on only a select group of girls that meet your standards.
After you beat yourself up enough (you already have), it's time to move on.
Let's fix shit.
The good news is -
You will also be the one to credit when you do Get Laid.
The Average Guy Gets Laid 3 to 5 Times in 76 Years
You know what separates your sex life from a "regular" guy?
3 or 4 girls.
Maybe 5 partners?
Nothing that most of you can't exceed in a single year after you tag your first.
The first one seems the most daunting.
It is - until it happens.
It might even be special (the experience/relief, not the girl).
After that - it's pretty much all the same.
You Don't Have to Be An "Alpha" Male to Lose Your Virginity
One of my criticisms of the "seduction community" (and self-improvement, in general) is how grossly exaggerated it is suggested that you "have to be alpha" to find success.
Instead of trying to achieve the goal (Getting Laid), guys stay busy "improving" themselves in hopes of one day beginning their pursuit.
YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE THE PERFECT BULLETPROOF "ALPHA" MALE TO GET ACTION.
By all means - work on yourself and get better each day.
But don't think for a second that you have to be superman or anyone special to Get Laid.
You can be a TOTAL LOSER and Get Laid.
You just have to try.
If, one day, you want to nail the super hotties or have a consistent sex life - you'll need to have solid confidence.
If They Show Up, They Like You and Consider You Attractive Enough
The last thing I want you to remember is -
You just need to start going out with some girls.
If a girl agrees to meet up with you and shows up -
SHE LIKES YOU.
(or is interested to some degree)
SHE CONSIDERS YOU PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE ENOUGH TO BE SEEN WITH AND POTENTIALLY TO SLEEP WITH.
When a girl likes you and considers you physically attractive enough:
- She will answer your texts.
- She will answer your calls.
- She will meet up with you.
- She will kiss you back.
- She will want to see you again.
- She will eventually share her pussy with you.
Very little "game" required.
Girls that like you will let you 'take the lead' and get emotionally attached simply by hanging out with you.
There is very little chance of "messing up" unless you are more weird or clingy than she is.
(if this is a problem read this article)
After a girl likes you - don't need a ton of "skill" to get her into your bed either.
("skill" is required to get them into bed quickly but most girls will make it super easy for you after 4-5 dates)
She'll basically jump in your bed after a while because she's emotionally attached and wants to have sex with you.
Unless you are seeing a girl that is waiting for marriage or has significant emotional problems/unhealthy views on sex, this is usually at about 5 or 6 dates or 6 to 8 weeks. Whichever comes first.
(Some girls have an absolute criteria so they don't feel like whores)
Obviously, there are some girls you will lose along the way, that's normal.
With my advice, you will be talking with enough girls so it won't really matter if one of them goes MIA.
So, remember these things when the "I'm-a-Virgin-Therefore-I-Will-Always-Be" Cycle kicks in -
- A guy that is uglier/suckier than you are - got laid last night.
- The average guy has sex with 3 to 5 partners in his entire lifetime.
(you aren't that far behind)
- You don't need to be an alpha male to lose your virginity.
- If a girl agrees to meet up with you (therefore she finds you physically attractive enough), unless you act like a total nutjob - you will probably be able to sleep with her, at her pace.
Again, these aren't meant to mindfuck you into believing that you deserve the world's most, best pussy.
Just to remind you that you can and will lose your V-Card if you really try.
Good Looking Loser's Guide to "How to Lose Your Virginity" continues here -
If you have comments, questions or anything else, please drop the comments on PART V (or on the Forum).
You will get direct feedback from one of us - we want you to lose your V-Card and getting moving.