I shouldn't have waited 7-8 months to hit you with this post.
btw- I don't know any of the girls in this photos.
If you are familiar with GLL, you'll know that we are about "screening" girls with physical advances simply to determine if they are sexually available. Girls that reject you/get lost, are generally rejecting your invite for sex because they aren't sexually available, girls will also get lost a lot if they know their logistics won't work. It's not necessarily you, they are just rejecting sex. If you looks and style are tight, it's pretty much always a rejection of the approach and not you.
That's not a fucking "reframe," it's the truth.
Some of my friends out here are on magazine covers on underwear commercials (kinda gay) and they get "rejected" by lesser girls. It's not because of their looks. I'll put on my life on that.
Remember, she's probably fucked a guy uglier and less cool than you anyway.
Okay cool. You knew that.
What to Say to Girls That Are Mean To You
Please listen now.
I want you to turn off the analytic voice in your head right now.
I don't ever ask you to accept the shit I say without comparing it to your experience or the other stuff you might have heard.
For this, however, I'm going to ask you to accept what I say.
It comes from experience, a lot of it.
You won't find this type of insight from a "PUA" guy that doesn't have experience with actually fucking a lot of really hot girls, hanging out with them, having them as fuck buddies on and off, being part of the same social circles, pool parties, concerts, going on road trips with them to Las Vegas, watching me pee on road trips, watching them pee on road tips then having to find a bathroom anyway, having them meet some of my friends, going to the gym with them, going to the beach with them, partying with them, getting ice cream with them at 1am, having me talk with their little brothers about working out, etc.
I understand what makes hot girls tick. Some are my friends, some are my fuckbuddies, some I just have a "professional" relationship with.
- I understand how excited they are when they meet a guy they like.
- I understand how devastating it is when their haircut turns out average.
- I understand what goes through their head when they post a hot picture on Facebook and less than 20 people "like it".
- I understand how upset some of hot girls get when they see another hot girl flaunting her perfect fake boobs.
- I understand how they panic when they turn 27, out of their prime, with no top 10% boyfriend or husband.
- I understand how a lot them are living week-to-week and doubting if they'll ever be famous.
- I understand how some of do adult film gigs (even the nice girls, not necessarily porno), just to pay rent and how bad they feel after.
I understand this stuff, I don't just "know" it. If that makes sense... It's not from an eBook.
(a complete list is in "Swag Factor")
I've actually always had hot girls in my life, but prior to 2007ish- I rarely scored with them.
I've since been with a whole host of pretty girls, some bitchy girls, some nice girls, some shy girls, some goofy girls, etc. etc.
I have really learned a lot because I've able to keep a lot of them around for months and months, usually because I'm thought to have good boyfriend potential (not boyfriend material). Girls would spend months trying to convert me [from a player] into a boyfriend, some made a good case actually.
I really got to see what every girl was about when they became regulars.
Some of them were huge disappointments, carrying so much emotional baggage it was fucking sad.
Others was absolutely great and would probably come over right now if I texted them, if they were available.
With nearly every fuck buddy, we'd have 1 or 2 day a months when we'd, drink/do drugs, go to a club, and come back and have sex.
I got to see how they treated other people, particularly other guys that tried to talk to them.
I began seeing a pattern after I started seeing this girl, Jamie.
The pattern holds nearly perfectly consistent to this very day. I've also seen it with girls that are just my friends. Honestly, I have not seen an exception to this rule.
The girls that are rude/mean to guys (within 5-10 seconds) of meeting them- HAVE PROBLEMS.
The girls that are ALWAYS polite to guys- DON'T HAVE PROBLEMS.
Keep in mind that most guys aren't touching or being crude to women when they approach, girls have no reason to be mean to them. We are aggressive and crude, so it's a bit different.
Again, this is something I figured out and not something I was ever told.
Girls That Are Mean vs. Girls That Are Nice To You
Lets compare 5 obvious girls that stand out-
K- Super hot. My best buddy for most of my life, until about 2011, we are still close though. Nice to me, on and off. Comes to LA to visit me, we'll always have huge incident that reminds me/us why we never got in a relationship again. We agree. Bi-Polar on guys. Sometimes very flirty, sometimes completely rude. She once put out a cigarette on some guy's neck, as the story goes. I'm guessing she'll see this and laugh.
M- Hot. Nice girl. Another long-term fuckbuddy, friend. Southern Belle, sorta. Always sucks up her mood for everyone, even when she should cry. She happy most of the time though. Takes work very seriously. Never had an argument with her in 5.5 years. Super polite to guys, even the rude guys. *Stable*
K2- Above Average. Drug addict. Family problems. Sweet girl when she tries super hard. Drama 50% of every phone call. Serious issues. Is only polite to guys when the drugs are right. Even when I took her home she was somewhat rude to me.
T- Very hot. Fitness freak. Body dysmophia, not necessarily a health freak though. Constantly goes back to her ex. Always brought meaningless drama to my apartment (her workout partner flaked out, people can't drive, the 24 hour gym closes at 10pm on weekends... shut up.). She is absolutely disgustingly rude to guys that aren't in shape.
S- Very hot. Sexy girl. Another long-term fuckbuddy, friend. She's down to hook up with no strings attached when she's single. In fact, I count on it and get excited because she body is ridiculous. Unlike 'M', the nice girl, S has a 'sexy' side.. but she's a not bitch. She's absolutely nice to every guy and is appreciative of all the attention. *Stable*
So there's five girls.
How each treated random guys who approached them was always a predictor/indicator of their personally and things to come.
I haven't seen differently. Honest to God. Every fucking time, eventually.
Every single girl (friend or fuckbuddy) that I saw being a bitch to a random guy-- HAD BAGGAGE that eventually showed up on my doorstep (or voicemail).
After I saw this pattern, I'd fucking cringe when one of my girls was rude to another person.
Oh no, another fucking psycho. And I'd be right.
Once I realized this I tried to preemptively thwart a potential attack on 1 or 2 occasions, "I don't know what that was about, but we aren't going to treat each other that way." They'd agree, only to later prove to a be psycho seemingly in need of heavy medication. I'm less than half-joking.
Sometimes a polite girl would later turn out to be crazy headcase, but this was way less common.
So, if you run into some girl that acts like an unemotionally unhealthy bitch, it's because she.
Or will be. Even the ones that have big public blow ups and apologize later, they're nuts too.
Don't blame yourself for one Goddamn second.
It took me like 20+ fuckbuddies to figure this out.
Early on, I'd get upset with myself if someone was mean to me. In 2006, I actually went home and cried one time.
Later on, I'd get into verbal sparing matches and call the crazy girls with big boobs "fat" and the girls with small boobs "flat." haha
I still was bummed out though.
I remember PUAs/dating gurus saying "oh that's her fault," "it's her loss," etc. etc. I knew what they were saying, but I didn't really believe it because I didn't know from personal experience.
I'm here to tell you- girls that are boring, weird or rude.
and the last two tend to have major have baggage.
Seriously, trust me on this one, I'm friends with some of these girls. It a shame. But don't play Dr. Phil and try to fix them.
If you encounter this type of stuff- my advice is get super physical with them, you have nothing to lose.
You don't actually want to get emotionally attached to them (or vice-versa), they make HORRIBLE fuckbuddies (for the most part) and they are nobody that you would want to be in a relationship with.
If you are able to spark something up, treat them like you'll never see them again.
The good news is- there's TONS of healthy, happy, super hot girls out there (and others that bring only a minimal amount of drama) into your life.
I want you to keep this in mind when you are screening.
You'll have more of a "Mr. Pussy Inspector" mentality, which is good.
Is she a weirdo? You really don't know. Honestly, after 3.5+ years of this stuff, I can't really predict it.
You don't know anything... Neither do I.
If I were to approach 10 girls, and have you and I predict the outcome of every approach, I guarantee- you and I would get over 50% wrong, most of the time.
I used to think that the girls that smiled with their mouth open after I touched them weren't psychos, there's no correlation whatsoever.
The psycho girls will let you know that they are damaged. It's not your issue.
Sure, you're screening to see who's DTF.
But frankly, you're gonna figure a lot more in the process-
- Some girls DTF and will be polite.
- Some girls aren't DTF and will be polite.
- Some girls aren't DTF and will have emotional problems.
- In rare cases, some girls are DTF and will have emotional problems, and you'll run into them later in the night and they'll be drunk apologize. Fuck them (literally) if you won't and don't call them. This is pretty rare though.
The emotionally unhealthy girls aren't worth adding to your life.
You may or may not believe this yet, you will though.
This might not be overly insightful, you've probably heard it before too. I'm confirming that it's true and it's one of the reasons that "rejections," "get lost," completely stopped bothering me. If you can grasp this, you'll be able to do unlimited approaches without much of shift in your own state.
Try screening (with touching) by saying- Are you are a psycho?
Emotional healthy girls get kick out of it because they know that other girls are lunatics.