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"That Guy"
We're going to talk about what "type" of guy (lifestyle) is most appealing to the hottest, coolest and usually - most popular girls.
Hot women meet a lot of guys.
Most are nice guy pushovers that might provide for a nice husband or loyal boyfriend but lack excitement, edge and sexual experience.
Other guys are "bad boy" types.
These guys are certainly the type that hot chicks tend to sleep with - but often they lack the necessary characteristics to be a long-term boyfriend (or fuckbuddy).
Though polar opposites - both these "types" are often one-dimensional and generic.
The hottest sexually active girls usually experience several guys of both types before they are 21.
After a while, these girls become somewhat disinterested in both types and aren't as apt to sign on for an uncommitted 'Fuckbuddy' relationship unless the guy has serious Boyfriend Potential. Many of these girls even stop getting excited about meeting "random guys" and leave the club/bar scene - often turning back to their social circles to find an attractive, cool guy to get serious with.* Not surprisingly, around this age (22-25), girls are starting to watch their friends get married and feel additional pressure to get serious.
*this is a trend among hot, popular girls (22+) that think "bad boys" only want to fuck and "nice guys" are only boyfriend material.
AS YOU SHOULD KNOW-
Your lifestyle/achievements/resume, plays a factor in "retention" (fuckbuddies aka uncommitted relationships), and committed relationships but not as much in how much you Get Laid.
(Logistics and Killer Instinct play a MUCH greater factor)
Your lifestyle, among other factors, is a significant factor in determining whether you are seen as Boyfriend Material (Nice Guy), Boyfriend Potential (Well-Rounded Player) or a Scumbag (Someone to use for sex).
It is somewhat of a misconception that you will Get Laid simply by "improving your lifestyle".
In fact, Krauser argues that "improving your value/lifestyle" has become the #1 excuse to procrastinate and not talk to women, and therefore a significant reason why a lot of guys aren't Getting Laid. With only a few exceptions, I concur.
It may help, but you will Get Laid more by improving your sex appeal (looks, style) and talking to more girls.
A lot of guys take up girl-friendly hobbies, such as yoga and salsa, dancing thinking it will help them Get Laid.
It might, but ultimately that is because he is talking/has access to more warm girls (numbers game) and not because "he is hotter because he does yoga".
With that said, after dissing "Self-Improvement Strictly For Pussy", I feel it's good for you to know what "type" (lifestyle) of guy gets the hottest girls most excited.
The type of guy who hot girls brag to her friends about.
The type of guy who can keep a hot girl staring at her phone for 16 hours at a time.
The type of guy who hot girls will ditch her friends for - even when she knows there will be social consequences.
The type of guy who has hot girls stalking his Facebook profile and comparing herself to his ex-girlfriends.
The type of guy who causes a hot girl to drunk text/call him on the weekends because she doesn't know what he's doing and it's driving her CRAZY.
The type of guy who has 4+ hot girls wanting to sleep with him.
The type of guy who hot girls masturbate to - even after she's slept with him.
The type of guy who hot girls get ABSOLUTELY OBSESSED WITH.
The type of guy who can keep hot girls in an uncommitted relationship for 6+ months - with no freakouts or DTR (determine the relationship) tantrums.
The type of guy whom hot girls consider to have the ultimate "Boyfriend Potential", even when he is sleeping with other girls and there is a good chance she'll never be his girlfriend.
(remember, having Boyfriend Potential is a GOOD thing; it's what keep girls around, Boyfriend Material - is not)
Remember - we are talking about the period of time when the guy-girl are getting to know each other.
Not first impressions.
Not when guy-girl just meet.
Sex appeal is BY FAR the MOST ATTRACTIVE criteria when you first meet a girl.
Not a lifestyle or resume.
(the only exception is 'status', a form of Swag Factor)
Let me tell you about "that guy" that is THAT GUY.
I call him - "Mr. Juxtaposition"
He's a walking paradox, even considered to be a hypocrite to normal guys that don't get much action and to less attractive women that consider elite guys to be unattainable "douchebags".
Though multi-dimensional, Mr. Juxtaposition is not necessarily well-rounded or super interesting.
He just has at least TWO significant things about him that seem to contradict themselves.
Usually, he is both EDGY and NOT EDGY.
This makes him unique.
The edgy side of him - makes him a player.
(usually style and behavior)
The not edgy side of him - makes him a keeper.
Lets give some very basic examples of Mr. Juxtaposition-
Even if Mr. Juxtaposition isn't great or super experienced at his hobby - the simple fact that he has a "paradox passion" makes him unique, cool and ultimately- SEXY.
Or at the very least - Above Average in comparison to the usual generic nice guy or bad boy.
It doesn't even matter if the hobby or passion isn't "chick friendly" or particularly appealing to women.
Mr. Juxtaposition is often among "Top 1%" that attractive girls consider "a catch" and relish the opportunity/challenge to lock down as a boyfriend.
Hot girls are willing to fuck him for months at a time - hoping one day that he'll call her his girlfriend, oftentimes knowing - that will never happen.
From what I've learned from my own experience, my friends that are/aren't successful with having multiple fuckbuddies and living on-and-off with hot girls as my roommates - it's more intriguing, unique and sexy to have a JUXTAPOSITION than to simply be accomplished or "well-rounded".
Ask Mark (admin on the forum).
He is the best-looking, highest-achieving, scholar athlete and well-rounded Renaissance Man I know and he couldn't get good looking girls to consider him anything but "Boyfriend Material" until we fixed him. (yeah, we FIXED HIM)
My Own Experience
Despite my approach anxiety, obsession with the gym/body image and very average social intelligence in my mid-20's, I always had a bit of Juxtaposition that served me well.
I've always had some nerdy (or non-meathead) interests.
Given the meathead persona/appearance, girls have always considered these characteristics pretty attractive. These things didn't "get me laid" but they helped keep girls around for longer than if I was one-dimensional and it probably helped me slowly get some girls into bed who were looking for a boyfriend.
(not a bad thing if you aren't getting much pussy anyway)
Once I started rocking a more edgy, less-preppy, style things started coming together.
These days, I'm a walking Juxtaposition or hypocrite - whatever you choose.
Are You Really Mr. Juxtaposition?
A lot of guys will find this discussion to be insightful.
A lot of those same guys have already convinced themselves that they are already Mr. Juxtaposition.
Maybe you are.
But maybe you aren't.
Or even more likely - maybe nobody even knows if you aren't presenting yourself as such (whether by appearance or conversation).
Make a point at telling chicks who you are and what your're about. Sometimes you can do so when you meet them, sometimes not.
(If you read this article - you'll remember that I particularly suggest that Black Guys do so)
Either way, self-improvement begins with taking a critical, non-bias look at yourself. Make sure you do so.
Remember - Mr. Juxtaposition isn't just well-rounded, good at stuff or "interesting".
He has 2 obvious characteristics that [nearly] directly oppose each other.
Once you get to know him - it's clear that he's not a "nice guy", "bad boy" or some easily understood predictable stereotype with nothing but a surface layer.
He's someone that can't be labelled or made sense of per normal standards and expectations.
Being "smart" and "lifting weights" is certainly a start - but it's not quite the specific, developed Juxtaposition that I'm encouraging you to shoot for.
Juxtaposition, though related, isn't quite "Swag Factor". Swag Factor is more about social status and first impressions - but still - Juxtaposition is a very significant part of being an elite guy and reaching your potential in life and with women.
Again, by NO MEANS do you have to be Mr. Juxtaposition to get hot girls into bed. It will be a HUGE help in keeping them around though. Trust me.
If you have a Juxtaposition or are working at it, tell us what it is-
This is your best article YET. I've always had this idea of being "Mr. Juxtaposition" as a guy that could easily be seen as someone who's fake or a weird outcast because of his two or more interests that seemed to oppose each other, such as being...
This is your best article YET. I've always had this idea of being "Mr. Juxtaposition" as a guy that could easily be seen as someone who's fake or a weird outcast because of his two or more interests that seemed to oppose each other, such as being a smart premed student who is intelligent and being a ripped/muscled guy who has style. The funny thing is I knew in the back of my mind this person would be more MUCH more interesting than the average guy, but your right; most guys are stereotypically average and generally aren't juxtapositioned. It would seem as if its weird to have two opposing traits, but in fact I now realize it makes you 100x more interesting/mysterious than the next average dude. Now I can go and pursue a life of being an opposing motherFer without any worries, Thanks man!
I don't know if I still have "it" (havent been sleeping around much lately, currently on the path for a relationship, in that stage of my life where I want one) BUT
Based on my appearance (well kept beard, nice teeth, chill laid back guy...
I don't know if I still have "it" (havent been sleeping around much lately, currently on the path for a relationship, in that stage of my life where I want one) BUT
Based on my appearance (well kept beard, nice teeth, chill laid back guy attitude) most girls would not know I'm a huge nerd - star wars, lord of the rings, etc.
In a place like LA or another big city, maybe that's not a big deal.
But in a place like Portland - the ladies think its so damn cute. Haha
Interesting post.
I feel like I fall into this category!
I consider myself an athlete. I played hockey and football back in the day, and now I'm a weight lifter. (Nowhere near the level I'm shooting for but still working on it) But, I also...
Interesting post.
I feel like I fall into this category!
I consider myself an athlete. I played hockey and football back in the day, and now I'm a weight lifter. (Nowhere near the level I'm shooting for but still working on it) But, I also play guitar, and I'm in a band and I rock a tattoo sleeve and a rib piece.
Not only that but I keep a 4.0 GPA in CC.
With my tattoos and what not I also run my own business and online website, so people seem a bit thrown off. It's great.
Bro, I know exactly what you mean, I'm exactly this guy you are describing, I am a multi-dimensional person. I'm a business guy I have good ethics, I try and do what's right and I'm all about improving myself, but at the same time I don't really...
Bro, I know exactly what you mean, I'm exactly this guy you are describing, I am a multi-dimensional person. I'm a business guy I have good ethics, I try and do what's right and I'm all about improving myself, but at the same time I don't really give a fuck, I say what I feel, and I do what I want. If I wanna go get a tattoo I will, if I wanna go smoke a blunt I will, if I wanna smash a chick I will. But as you see I'm not too much of either one in fact I am a hybrid is how I've always viewed myself. I fall right in the middle and I have the attitude and personality to go with it. I'm a bad boy but at the same time I'm not piece of trash , I'm a good dude but at the same end of that I ain't no push over bitch I'm a true boss and I live life how I wanna live it, and I never feel bad for doing me.
Bodybuilder, but one of the only white kids in the business faculty at my university thus making me stand out like crazy because lots of people can't believe I am actually intelligent too, also very cocky, but a perfect gentleman (except in bed).
Where would music production and guitar ability fit in this juxtaposition. I make legit professional sounding EDM tracks as a hobby. Dance music producer, if you will. I also teach guitar lessons and have been playing for 13 years. I'm a web...
Where would music production and guitar ability fit in this juxtaposition. I make legit professional sounding EDM tracks as a hobby. Dance music producer, if you will. I also teach guitar lessons and have been playing for 13 years. I'm a web j3gllloper for my job. My gut is that these are not all that edgy.. Not sure though?
From a looks standpoint, I do not look naturally Edgy. I do dress Edgy now, but I am naturally a pretty boy. Half Asian like Chris. In case this matters.
Would these be considered Edgy or Non-Edgy?
I wouldn't worry about that - Music is a sexy identity all to its own (given that it is a major part of your life). Just stay/get in really good shape - musicians are stereotypically skinny-fat
I didn't think the "Get Hung" guide would have girls eyeing my bulge. It did.
I didn't think that your exercise and diet advice would have girls checking me out. It did.
I DEFINITELY didn't think that your hair-loss prevention would fix my hairline. Not in a billion years. It mother fucking did. You saved me a crazy amount of time, a ton of money, unnecessary pain, and destroyed my #1 source of anxiety. DESTROYED IT.
Kratom is next!
To anyone reading this, follow through, read this material, APPLY this material, and enjoy life.
Thanks again Chris, life would suck without you.
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