How to Not Give a Fuck What People Think
(A Different Perspective from Good Looking Loser)
This is a long discussion, even by Good Looking Loser standards.
While 'not giving a fuck' isn't completely a choice, there are things you can do to adopt this mindset or render people's opinions useless.
There's not all that much quality insight about 'Not Giving a Fuck' out there.
Certainly you've heard the beyond useless, non-applicable mainstream advice -
Don't be insecure!
Don't let their words hurt you!
Don't care what people think!
Don't give them the power!
Lions don't care about the opinions of sheep!
The usual garbage with no steps.
But frankly, 2 weeks ago, I didn't have much to say about the matter either -
- In your 20's - just look better and Get Laid more than the average guy and you'll automatically stop caring what he thinks.
(acquire Swag Factor - Status)
- In your 30's - just have more money and Get Laid more than the average guy and you'll automatically stop caring what he thinks.
Both are true but both are long-term destinations that you can't just "do".
But I thought about it some more and realized there is more to it...
My insights are based on 32 years of living on planet earth.
For ~25 years, I dedicated my near total existence trying to impress others and very much 'giving a fuck'.
The past ~7 years, however, I've stopped caring about impressing others or what they thought of me.
Going from "always giving a fuck" to "usually not giving a fuck" is something I can proudly claim I accomplished.
But perhaps to your surprise -
I don't actually think trying to develop an "I don't give a fuck" (IDGAF) attitude is that big of a deal.
There are more important things and you need to look at it in a different way.
You'll see where I'm going with this in a second.
Remember, we are discussing 'not caring' in a personal and social context, not a business and public relations context.
If you own a business - you should definitely care what people think.
Does Chris Really Not Give a Fuck?
(A Reflection on Where I Stand)
Apparently you guys seem to think that I am a decent source of IDGAF insight.
You might be correct -
I am wired a different way.
After all, I have this creepy website under my real name 'Christopher Mitchell Deoudes', show my face and I even put up naked pictures (NSFW) of myself. I share stories of my past insecurity and loneliness, show you legitimately creepy (not smooth) interactions with girls and discuss some oddball turn-on's/sexual fetishes that I have.
7 years ago, I was a broke a Law School dropout who massively underachieved with women and had no real plan for his life. Today I own 3 successful businesses, slept with more chicks than I can count and literally don't have to do anything I don't want.
It's partly because I figured out to stop caring what people thought of me.
This attitude has allowed me to take "risks" and follow my instincts (no matter how crazy or creepy), even though there are people who are more talented AND harder working than I.
But it sure didn't used to be this way and I am by no means totally indifferent to people's opinions.
I just 'give a fuck' somewhat less than the average guy.
So what changed?
Why don't I 'give a fuck' as much anymore?
There's one major reason that I don't care as much what people think of me anymore -
I am more serious about my life now.
Plain and simple.
I ACTUALLY care more about myself than others.
I ACTUALLY desire success more than validation for my success.
This didn't used to be the case.
10 years ago, I swore I was serious about my goals (gym, school) but in reality - I just wanted approval.
In a 'dating' content, we always say -
When your desire to GET LAID is ACTUALLY greater than your desire to avoid rejection - you will have no more approach anxiety.
The mind is a powerful thing -
When you ACTUALLY want to do something, your thoughts and reactions fall into line.
But I'm Serious About My Goals!
I Just Get Easily Distracted!
And For Some Reason [I LET] People Get To Me!
No you aren't serious.
You just think you are.
But a lot of people swear that they care more about success than what other people think of them.
Yet the same people immediately get sidetracked when someone, either fairly or unjustly, says something they don't agree with or puts them down.
Some respond by becoming passive-aggressive toward friends and family.
Others take to social media to flip out and try to rally support for their fragile egos.
Others quietly stew about it for days.
They all swear that they don't give a fuck.
We've all seen this person.
In reality, most people almost immediately lose focus on their real priorities when they hear that someone thinks in opposition/lowly of them.
Obviously they aren't THAT serious about their mission.
Actions speak louder than words.
If you indulge "haters" or have the repetitive urge to engage someone (who may even have a reasonable argument against you) in a time-wasting debate - it's just evidence that you are unfocused, insecure and you don't have a real purpose in life.
It took me about 30 years to realize this.
I have plenty of advice below, but perhaps you just need to GET SERIOUS about your life.
Find something in your life that is worth living and dying for.
You might have to try a bunch of different things but when you are actually serious about your life -
"Not giving a fuck" will take care of itself.
How Important Is 'Not Giving a Fuck' for Getting Laid?
Glad you asked.
'Not Giving a Fuck' is obviously important so you can talk to the chicks you want and develop/go hard with your Killer Instinct to get them in your bed.
But it's somewhat exaggerated (at least around dating/pick up communities) how much IDGAF attitude you really need to have to Get Laid consistently.
You need some IDGAF in social environments but you do not need to be some sort of hardened indifferent delusional emotionless sociopath to bag a new girl every week.
It's a misconception that the guys that fuck 1-2 new girls a week are stone cold killers with immovable, unbreakable "frame control" and self confidence.
They are just cool guys, better looking than average and have just enough "IDGAF" to not be afraid to look bad a couple times a night in front of groups of girls.
They also almost always have the Killer Instinct to close the deal when they get a "live one".
That's their real edge.
Remember, when a sexually available girl (DTF) likes you, she'll simply just follow your lead all the way to your bedroom.
You don't need any crazy 'IDGAF' moves, you just need enough 'IDGAF' attitude to -
- make yourself look good and cool (sex appeal/swag factor)
- start conversations with women (social freedom)
- repeat and not care if it doesn't go smoothly (social freedom)
- lead with "follow me" and take them to a predetermined destination (killer instinct)
With all that said, 'not giving a fuck' is definitely important and something that will benefit your entire life.
IDGAF Fun Fact
100% of the people that announce that they "Don't Give a Fuck!", always give a fuck.
How to Not Care What People Think
(How to Not Give a Fuck)
I don't know how to organize it, so here's a list.
#1 GET SERIOUS ABOUT YOUR LIFE
It bears repeating - people who are ACTUALLY SERIOUS about what they are trying to accomplish don't easily get sidetracked or worry what others think of them.
They literally don't have the time to get sidetracked.
Nothing except really serious issues can rip their focus away from their ONE very specific goal.
Ask yourself -
If you were ACTUALLY serious about Getting Laid, would you let some undersexed shmuck who's watching you at the bar distract you from talking to girls?
Would you let some emotionally unhealthy girl stop you from hooking up with other girls?
Would you even let your own "Approach Anxiety" stop you?
If you were ACTUALLY serious about building a business, would you get in fights with irrelevant haters on Youtube, social media or the comments section of some blog?
If you were ACTUALLY serious about getting a 6-pack, would you actually care if your skinny-fat friends thought of your diet?
Get serious about your own life.
That's how you stop caring about what other people think of you.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck' but in reality you are just serious about your life.
#2a FOCUS ON DOING WHAT YOU WANT INSTEAD OF 'NOT GIVING A FUCK'
Focusing on 'How to Not Care What Other People Think' is focusing on the wrong thing -
The better thing is to prioritize YOU.
Instead of focusing on others (or trying to not focus on others), focus on trying to DO WHAT YOU WANT - something you have control over.
Regardless - DOING WHAT YOU WANT is what you are trying to do in the first place.
It was never about 'what other people think'.
You don't actually care.
You care about how the social pressure can affect YOU and prevent you from DOING WHAT YOU WANT.
So skip the middle man - just try to DO WHAT YOU WANT.
Somedays, you will literally not care what anyone thinks.
Somedays, you will feel like everyone is watching your every move and judging you.
It won't matter if you DO WHAT YOU WANT.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you just make the choice to DO WHAT YOU WANT and the world has to adjust.
IDGAF Fun Fact
People that don't give a fuck also have a sense of humor.
#2b TO DO WHAT YOU WANT DESPITE OF WHAT OTHERS THINK IS REAL POWER
This DO WHAT YOU WANT concept runs deep and I have an entire discussion on it.
Unfortunately, it's not super easy to implement.
Especially if you've spent a quarter of a century seeking approval, validation and non-confrontation - like I had.
Just being aware that you always have the choice to DO WHAT YOU WANT or cave to social pressure can be empowering.
The best way to adopt the DO WHAT YOU WANT mindset is -
To admit that DOING WHAT YOU WANT is ALWAYS a choice you can make.
To choose to DO WHAT YOU WANT in the face of social pressure.
That's how you really start training your brain to start living on your terms.
Although you may never be totally indifferent to others, having the power to DO WHAT YOU WANT in moments of social tension is REAL EMPOWERMENT.
If you can make a habit of 'DOING WHAT YOU WANT', "giving a fuck" or "not going giving a fuck" doesn't really matter.
"Not giving a fuck" is simply an ideal.
DO WHAT YOU WANT is an actionable step and a choice.
People that DON'T GIVE A FUCK, DO WHAT THEY WANT.
People that DO WHAT THEY WANT, DON'T GIVE A FUCK.
Do you see how this works?
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you just DO WHAT YOU WANT even when you care what people think.
#3a SEE AVERAGE PEOPLE FOR WHAT THEY ARE
Although your focus should be on trying to DOING WHAT YOU WANT, without being malicious - it doesn't hurt to consider where the average person is in their life since it's their disapproval that we so fear.
Who is the Average Guy? -
- He doesn't Get Laid.
- He can't Get Laid without having a girlfriend.
- He has no money or is in debt.
- He doesn't know what he wants in life.
- If he figures it out - he doesn't know how to get what he wants.
- He is skinny-fat or fat.
- He can't lift his own body weight.
- He has a job he doesn't like or hates.
and plenty more average things.
When you look at it that way, it's rather silly to care what the average guy thinks.
If you owned a business, and someone applied with that resume, you would toss it in the trash.
Unless you are running for public office, you shouldn't care what the average person thinks.
His approval or disapproval literally has no bearing on your success whatsoever.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you just don't take average people seriously.
IDGAF Fun Fact
I once hooked up with a girl that does those 'mixed wrestling videos', she was actually pretty hot in 2009 - but now she's way too butch.
#3b CONSIDER THE SOURCE
(No Emotionally Healthy Person Hates on People or Fightson the Internet)
This one piggybacks off #3a.
I encourage you to CONSIDER THE SOURCE if you are worried about what people think or hear something that upsets you.
From what I've seen from my 32 years of walking around on this planet -
I don't know a single emotionally healthy person that hates on people in real life or uses the Internet to "talk shit" or flame people.
That's just not how successful people invest their time.
That is how losers spend their time.
There's so much better stuff they could be doing (having sex, making money, playing outside, going to the gym, washing potatoes, doing hardcore drugs in moderation) but instead they are "trolling" or "hating" online.
Believe me -
Your life is better than their life.
Here's the example I used in "Mentors > Role Models" discussion -
Travis Kalanick created Uber in 2009.
It's valued at $42 billion right now.
Do you think he spent 2000-2008 constantly stirring up drama, talking shit about his friends, posting pictures of "douchebags" online, trolling on Internet or fighting people on forums or in YouTube comments?
Correct answer -
He invested the vast majority of his time, energy, labor and emotions into building [what later became] Uber.
The fact of the matter is -
You are probably overly concerned about the opinions of people that have little to no influence or social and financial status.
I know I was.
You should have a little "arrogance" (or common sense) and not take most people seriously.
Especially not faceless people online.
The average person doesn't even take his own life seriously, why the fuck should you?
The only opinions that might matter are of those who are 'above' you in status or people that you respect.
Feedback or thoughts from accomplished people can be valuable because in almost all cases - it's not coming from a negative 'hate-driven' place.
But you already know this.
So stop taking the average person seriously when they think negatively of you.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you just don't argue with losers.
IDGAF Fun Fact
Girls who smoke like to have sex.
#4 WANTING TO BE LIKED IS OKAY
(It's OKAY if You Sometimes Care What People Think)
This might be my most radical belief of ALL TIME.
Wanting To Be Liked Is...
Does that take any pressure off?
Red Pillers always feel that "wanting to be liked" is always a bad thing.
Constantly seeking approval is a bad thing.
Wanting to be liked by people is perfectly fine.
In fact, if you want to get hot pussy, you better care what hot girls think of you and the first impression you make.
You just shouldn't put much stock into what any 1 individual girl thinks of you.
It's the collective group of vaginas that matters.
DO WHAT YOU WANT obviously takes priority to wanting to be liked, but I'm just reassuring you it's okay to desire some love, status, praise, affection and respect from people.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you want to be liked and respected like everyone else. You prioritize your happiness however.
IDGAF Fun Fact
Red Pill philosophy is meant to leave you without friends so you have to visit websites such as Good Looking Loser. It's a conspiracy!
#5 MR. IDGAF IS ACTUALLY A HAPPY GUY
Perhaps obvious, Mr. IDGAF is a happy guy.
After all -
He doesn't give a fuck, DOES WHAT HE WANTS.
Some people have the wrong idea of how Mr. IDGAF thinks though.
Mr. IDGAF isn't an angry drunk who hasn't gotten laid in 6 month and yells "I don't give a fuck!" and pees in a public parking lot while looking around trying to see who believes him and who doesn't.
Mr. IDGAF is a happy, emotionally healthy, empowered guy that doesn't care what people think because he's happy and his focus is on more important things.
Mr. IDGAF is rarely in conflict with other people because he has other priorities.
Mr. IDGAF isn't constantly telling people (or himself) that "he doesn't give a fuck" and aggressively/passive-aggressively responding to haters or disloyal friends.
So how can you become Mr. Happy IDGAF guy?
That is another subject entirely.
But here is some help in the meantime -
- "Take Good Looking Loser's Life or Death Test"
- "21 Things That You Can Start Doing TODAY to Stop Being Negative"
- "Thoughts and Reflections From Following a Kratom Lifestyle for 5+ Years"
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you are just too happy and busy to care about what other people think.
IDGAF Fun Fact
Part of being happy is appreciating success.
#6 TRY TO EMBRACE YOUR COUNTER-CULTURE
(You Are Different, Stop Trying to Be Otherwise)
I'm doing my best to explain these concepts and offer applicable steps, but some of this "feel this way" "think this way" or "embrace this idea" mindset advice doesn't always immediately translate to a set of directions.
If you are still with me (we are ~2500 words in), it is fair to assume that you are DIFFERENT than the average person.
You and I know that.
Average people don't read this blog.
But sometimes being different makes you feel like a disconnected outsider.
This is especially true of our younger guys who are simply not as sure of themselves yet and still desire a sense of belonging in being seen as the "regular guy".
The difference between me at age 32 vs. age 22 is that I've ACTUALLY come to embrace that I'M DIFFERENT.
I always knew I was different.
I always liked myself for it.
And I always did my own thing.
But I never TRULY EMBRACED it.
I was only semi-proud.
These days, it's different.
I'm actually nearly 100% proud of myself and thus free to DO WHAT I WANT.
I'm proud of the stuff I don't conform to.
I'm proud of the stuff that I do conform to.
Most people think they are different and unique.
Maybe some are.
But since they never fully embrace their 'counter culture', they are never really able to DO WHAT THEY WANT.
But you're different.
It's time that you stop hanging on to thoughts that you are a "regular guy" or have anything in common with him.
This will make more sense as you get into your mid and late 20's.
You'll wonder why you ever held on to being a regular guy.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you are just comfortable in your own skin.
IDGAF Fun Fact
Very few people actually don't give a fuck.
#7 NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOUR OPINION EITHER
(Indifference is a Two Way Street)
Hear me out.
As far back as AOL Instant Messenger, I used to love to put up my 'opinions' about life, sports, politics, just about everything.
I had an opinion.
In fact, I had the right opinion and I needed to tell people ASAP.
I loved having people agree with me, it meant the world to me.
I also took pride in attacking/debating those who didn't.
I never lost. I was undefeated.
These days, for the most part, I rarely share my opinions with random people.
The desire is just not there anymore.
Why do I no longer want to share my opinions with people?
I simply don't care if people disagree OR AGREE with me.
It doesn't matter.
Nothing is better or worse in my world if they disagree OR AGREE with me.
It doesn't get me laid, doesn't make me more money, doesn't make me more successful and frankly - I'm too busy for another distraction.
If I have something worthwhile to discuss, I'll talk to my friends or family. Maybe.
Guys that ACTUALLY DON'T GIVE A FUCK, understand that indifference is a two-way street -
- Other people's opinions don't matter
- Their own opinions don't really matter either
That's solid indifference right there.
I'm not saying that "not caring about anything" or 'total indifference' is what you should be aiming for.
It's just an obvious difference between the me of today (empowered/successful, 32) and me of 10 years ago (approval seeking/underachieving, 22).
- I care way less about your opinion.
- But I care equally less about telling you my own.
-- Frankly, I care way less about my own opinion too.
I'm still concerned about the world.
Not sharing their opinion will be really hard for some people because they very much DO GIVE A FUCK and absolutely love the drama.
For some, there's no easy fix other than to realize that constantly sharing your opinion and reading/reacting to the feedback is a colossal waste of time.
The next time that you feel like going on a rant to your friends about some political issue or blowing up on Facebook/Twitter about some social issue, slow down for a minute.
Think to yourself -
WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS?
WHY DO I CARE SO MUCH?
WHAT CAN I DO INSTEAD?
Again, if you are an opinionated guy and love discussing controversial subjects at length (knowing full well no one is changing their mind) for entertainment purposes - that's fine, I'm not telling you to live differently.
It's more important to DO WHAT YOU WANT.
However, if you are really looking to NOT GIVE A FUCK about other people, try stepping away from your own opinion.
Opinions of any sort have no effect on your world.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you just care more about your success than your opinion.
Virtually anytime I share my opinion today, in person or on the Internet, it's as a complete joke.
It's better that way -
#8 BE THAT DOUCHEBAG
(Get Used to It - Normal Guys Fucking Hate You)
I've been considered a "douchebag" ever since the word was unofficially added to the English dictionary in early ~2004.
That's 11 years now.
The ironic thing is -
Way back in 2004, I was hardly a selfish "douchebag" who didn't give a fuck what people thought of me.
I was actually a nice, fairly-wholesome, sensitive kid who was obsessed with his physical appearance and social feedback.
People just considered me to be a douchebag because I was in shape and I didn't dress in normal, lifeless, outdated clothing.
You've probably experienced the same thing.
If you are above-average (or just appear that way), the average guy will resent you.
It just comes with the territory.
These days, even in Los Angeles, when I walk around with a bandana, guys stare at me and think negative thoughts to themselves.
I'm used to the stares.
I wasn't always though.
I wanted to expose people who didn't like me as haters and losers.
I just don't care anymore.
The faster you can get used to being seen as a "douchebag" by guys and less desirable girls - the better.
'Douchebag' is a word that low status guys use to describe other guys with higher social and financial status.
Get used to the people staring at you and looking down when you make eye contact.
Get used to guys standing next to you while you talk to girls, desperately hoping the girl disses you.
Get used to less desirable girls perceiving you to be an asshole simply based on your appearance.
(just be nice to them if you are trying to fuck)
That is the reality you are signing up for.
The best way to get used to being a Douchebag is to simply look at as good as you can, put yourself out there and see that the vast majority of people that you come across are totally forgettable and their opinions, favorable or otherwise, are completely insignificant to your life.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you are just comfortable with your Douchebag persona.
IDGAF Fun Fact
Getting a tattoo or piercing will increase your IDGAF by 33%
#9 SOCIAL CONSEQUENCES DON'T ACTUALLY EXIST
(Be That Creeper)
One of the most important things is to experience that there are NO SUCH THING AS SOCIAL CONSEQUENCES from strangers.
What I mean is -
Though it may feel like otherwise in the moment, if you creep some random girl out - it literally has no repercussions whatsoever on your life or any other random girl you speak to.
In fact -
You are 1 girl closer to Getting Laid.
So your chances actually just improved.
I always "knew" this but I recall the first time when I actually started believing it.
One September evening at Skybar in West Hollywood a girl in her mid 20's told me I was "too old" to talk to her. Rude.
I looked around the pool area for a better option.
The next girl I talked to was literally sitting 15 feet away.
She ended up in my bed about an hour later.
She had just turned 19, was completely sober and cute as a button.
She thought I was in my early 20's.
(I was 27)
It was on that beautiful night that I realized 'social consequences' among complete strangers - literally DO NOT EXIST.
If you follow Good Looking Loser, you already know that 'social consequences' are imaginary, but you need to get out there and prove it to yourself.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you simply know that 'social consequences' don't exist so you aren't afraid to look like a creep sometimes.
IDGAF Fun Fact
At least 1000 girls think I'm the biggest creep on the face of the earth. I have slept with some of them too.
#10 TRY TO SLOW THE USUAL REACTIVE EMOTIONAL TRAINWRECK
In the early stages of trying to 'not give a fuck', it's going to be difficult to simply "not care" about things or people that traditionally upset you.
That's fine, you can't really control that, you've been programmed to 'give a fuck'.
What you can control (to some extent) is how bent out of shape you get and how much TIME YOU WASTE thinking about it.
The next time someone or something pisses you off and you start the usual trainwreck of negative emotions and reactions, do your best to stop it and break the cycle - something that you have probably never even tried in the past.
For men, it's easier to get mad than to control our emotions.
The next time you want to do something and you feel social tension trying to discourage you -
Stop thinking about it and do it anyway.
Look at it as practice.
* again, this refers to your personal and social life, if someone tries to harm your family or business - ABSOLUTELY RETALIATE
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you simply have better control over your emotions.
IDGAF Fun Fact
Once you truly don't care what people think, you are free to DO WHAT YOU WANT.
#11 STOP PUTTING YOURSELF IN THE SAME FUCKING POSITIONS OVER AND OVER
Overly "giving a fuck" is largely just a lack of focus, determination and self-confidence.
Just as you can somewhat control having trainwreck reactions that extend for days, you can also do yourself a favor and not put yourself in SAME positions where you always get all bent out of shape.
That means -
- Stop sharing your opinions with people.
- Stop reading/listening to everyone else's opinions.
- Stop concerning yourself with social or political issues.
- After 1 warning - cut ties with friends/family/fuckbuddies/girlfriends that annoy you.
- Immediately stop talking to a girl who "shit tests" you in a way that you do not approve.
(Girls/people that are mean to strangers have emotional problems)
- Stand your ground but don't speak to people who annoy you in public.
- Ignore instead of engaging "haters" and other low status agitators.
- Get serious with your life.
A lot of people that claim that they 'don't want to give a fuck' actually seek out drama and conflict.
Hopefully you aren't one of those types - that is hard to change.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you simply avoid drama and drama queens.
* again, this discussion pertains to your personal and social life, not your professional or business life.
IDGAF doesn't go over well with business partners and customers.
#12 HAVING A BIG DICK CAN REALLY BE A SPECIAL THING
A Good Looking Loser Loser post wouldn't be complete without mentioning the 'big cock factor'.
Although some guys insist "size doesn't matter", it sure mattered to me and I increased my dick size from ~5.25" to over 7" (NSFW) in length and from ~4.8" to over 6" in girth (post Bathmate session).
The physical and psychological impact it had in the bedroom was greater than I thought.
While having a fat piece of meat hanging between your legs may not directly encourage social IDGAF changes, some of the things that girls tell you in the bedroom will really feed your ego and stick with you for a lifetime.
Superficial or not, your "Sense of Entitlement" tends to go up when girls request your pictures to show their friends (and in one case - ex-boyfriend).
Your confidence goes through the roof when guys in your party circles ask which girls you've fucked because they are seemingly concerned about not measuring up or being able to fill the pussy that you enjoyed.
You feel like you are something special and that every chick will be a returning customer so long as you get your meat inserted.
Maybe it's stupid - but this kind of shit gave me such confidence after years of being somewhat sheepish about my size.
It's that warm and fuzzy, I'm the man feeling.
Egotistical or not, in my opinion, there's no better "cure" for sexual anxiety than a thick floppy impressive dick. Seeing girls eyes light up like they won the lottery is priceless.
Check out our stuff on penis enhancement, you don't even have to spend a dime to gain both length and girth.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you have a penis that rests warmly and confidently on the inside of your right thigh.
IDGAF Fun Fact
Being in a room where over 50% of the people know you are hung will increase your IDGAF by 36%
#13 WIN AT LIFE
(and Then Shut Up About It)
Simply 'being better' than the average guy won't automatically launch you into IDGAF mode.
I know a lot of successful people that very deeply care what others think of them.
Still, there is an unmistakable confidence that comes from knowing you are cooler, better looking, stronger, wealthier, better hung and can Get Laid more than the average guy.
It's not that you consider him to be inferior.
Nor do you feel the need to put him down.
It's that deep-down, you ACTUALLY consider yourself to be superior to the average guy.
But not in an arrogant way.
Although you might be working on yourself at first out of sheer insecurity, once you start getting ahead of the average guy - you will naturally not care as much about what he thinks.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you simply know you have more going for you.
IDGAF Fun Fact
Confidence is knowing you are better than your competition and not having to tell people.
#14 GET REAL EXPERIENCE & THICK SKIN
I can give you all the mindset/techniques in the world, but ultimately developing IDGAF is going to be because you have built a legit tolerance to social tension and live a happy life.
The reason I don't want to insult girls who are rude to me is because I legitimately don't care anymore.
The reason I don't want to fight guys who stare at me or give me dirty looks is because I legitimately don't care anymore.
The reason I don't get into Internet fights is because I legitimately don't care anymore.
The reason I don't care anymore is because I've dealt with virtually every type of negative response or "hate" that imaginable.
When someone calls me a "douchebag", it's only the 259,520,149 time I've heard it.
After hearing something 259,520,149 times - it seems to lose its effect.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you simply have seen the exact same scenario 259,520,149 times.
IDGAF Fun Fact
I don't know any non-celebrity that is called a 'douchebag' more than myself.
#15 OPTIONS ARE THE REAL GAME-CHANGER
Everything I said above is part of adapting an IDGAF reality, but like #15 (Experience/Thick Skin) NOTHING can substitute for knowing you ACTUALLY have plenty of options.
Eventually - you will HAVE TO get to this point if you want legit IDGAF.
A man with options is a man that doesn't give a fuck.
A man with options is a man who can DO WHAT HE WANTS.
Once you truly believe you can go out 2 or 3 nights a week and Get Laid at least 1 time - you won't give a fuck about getting sex ever again.
You won't get pushed around in any of your relationships with women either.
In the meantime...
Just try to bring that first girl in.
Get in good shape, use online dating, go on dates and do some basic guy approaching (compliment, small talk, ask for number).
You'll eventually land your first fuckbuddy.
Keep her around with our Retention Guide.
Try to do EVERYTHING with her and get as much sexual experience as you can.
Fuck her upside down, make her squirt, lick her butthole. Do everything.
But while you are doing that - continue to hit on other girls.
You'll find yourself more at ease because you have been Getting Laid and already have at least one option for sex.
Once you are fucking 2 girls, even if they aren't super hotties, you'll feel what it's like to be a man with options.
You'll feel what it's like to NOT GIVE A FUCK.
To other people, it will look like 'you don't give a fuck', but in reality you simply know you have options.
So there you have it.
You don't need to become an emotionless sociopath who is totally indifferent and immune to human suffering and the status quo to Get Laid on the regular.
Still, not giving much of a fuck will certainly help and extend to other areas of your life.
ACTUALLY GETTING SERIOUS about your life is the first and main step to not giving a fuck.
Things fall into place when you ACTUALLY care more about yourself than other people's sideshows or manufactured drama.
DOING WHAT YOU WANT in every situation is the key to empowerment.
IDGAF status might seem far away, if you DO WHAT YOU WANT - it won't really matter if you care what people think.