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I've been a in a rut the last few weeks because I keep seeking comfort. Nothing good comes from seeking comfort. Every worthwhile change begins with a moment of pain, or anxiety, or something else unpleasant. If living a kickass life felt good all the time, "average" wouldn't be the mediocrity that it is. Comfort zones are graveyards for the forgettable. I've been letting my "Inner Toddler" boss me around (his favorite five words are, "I don't feel like it!" Fuck that little asshole).
The best and most memorable times of my life are when I get into this mindset where as soon as I realize something scares me, I run straight at it. And especially when I start doing things because they're uncomfortable (even little things, like cold showers), if only to prove that I can (a couple months ago I made myself puke on a treadmill because I said I was gonna do an hour of cardio, and I wasn't going to break my word). I could whine about what I need to do to get back into that mindset, or I could just fucking do it and quit being a little bitch.
Alright I'm doing this now. Every match I get I'm using this line, and will be serious about making it happen.
I'm ruined. I can never have regular sex again. I'm not exaggerating when I say that was the MOST profound experience of my life... and bare in mind I've tripped on LSD several times.
Just like an LSD trip, I'm struggling to find the words to describe what happened last night... It was 12 hours of the best sex of my entire fucking life. We started at 10pm and it's 10.30am right now and I've cum like 10 times, I haven't slept for a single second. My dick doesn't even work anymore, it's dead.
I knew a 3some would be erotic, but I had no idea it would be like this. These two girls were best friends and they've wanted to fuck each other for ages. All it took was for me to say "Go into the bedroom and start making out" and holy fucking shit, they went crazy on each other. It was the most erotic thing I've ever seen in my entire life, I'm not doing it justice and I don't even care to explain why it was so good. It's burned into my memory forever.
The virgin girl was HOT as fuck, way hotter than her pics. She was thin, with big tits, the cutest, most innocent face ever and a hot little pussy. And she was so much fun to fuck, and she loved being dominated (she loved being slapped in the face most of all). On top of that, she loved when I told her to dominate Woody Allen, and she ended up slapping woody allen in the face several times LOL. I taught her a few things, like how to pull woody allen's hair, how to spank her, etc.
They're also both SUPER wet and super tight, they're both 18 and holy fucking shit they looked so good together. There's something so hot about their innocence mixed with their horniness and lack of experience. Jesus.
Fuck, I know I'm ranting.
It was also a weird experience because I spent several hours with each of them just one-on-one. For a few hours, Woody Allen slept, and I fucked the virgin girl, just her and I. I ended up walking her to the train station, still just her and I, holding hands, kissing and talking. Doing the typical "girlfriend" stuff.
Then I spent several hours alone with Woody Allen, fucked her several times, walked her to the train station and held her hand too.
It felt like I had 2 girlfriends, like I barged into the middle of their friendship and "took" both of them and made them mine. Like they both belong to me now.
God fucking dammit I need this again. I need it so bad. Part of me is fucking terrified the virgin girl won't want to do it again... like she was just "using" me so that she could fuck Woody Allen, and also so she could lose her virginity. I was just "the guy with the dick", basically. Hell, I think even Woody Allen is a little worried about that because she mentioned "I really hope [virgin girl] wants to fuck you again".
I know the only reason I have that fear is because my emotions are running high right now, and I haven't slept, and I'm still riding the high of the best sexual experience of my life, and my emotions are screaming "Oh please let me experience this again".
All good though - Woody allen already said if virgin girl doesn't want another 3some, we'll grab other girls from tinder. It's really obvious to both of us that this "unlocked" something in us - we both NEED to do this again.
This has been something I've dreamt about since I was like 14. I never in a billion years thought I would EVER have two cute girls in my bed at the same time. It doesn't even feel real, I'm still processing it. I don't have much of a sense of entitlement; I know it doesn't seem like it from my logs, but I still don't believe I "deserve" to get laid. But I feel like this 3some was a huge step to becoming "a guy who gets laid".
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I didn't think the "Get Hung" guide would have girls eyeing my bulge. It did.
I didn't think that your exercise and diet advice would have girls checking me out. It did.
I DEFINITELY didn't think that your hair-loss prevention would fix my hairline. Not in a billion years. It mother fucking did. You saved me a crazy amount of time, a ton of money, unnecessary pain, and destroyed my #1 source of anxiety. DESTROYED IT.
Kratom is next!
To anyone reading this, follow through, read this material, APPLY this material, and enjoy life.