TOPIC: Nearly 2 years porn free but...

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T Wolf wrote: I guess it depends on how you look at it.

I often feel more productive by getting it out of the way quickly rather than going into my phone, texting some girls and having them come over, entertaining them for some time, wasting time on foreplay/post-sex emotional support, getting them home, etc.

^lol that is so much truth in a few sentences

but i think i can agree that when fapping one has to do it for healthy/normal/loving reasons. i'm a compulsive fapper and when i have down times (such as now) i tend to forget all my obligations and stay in bed fapping like 3-4 times in a row. and to dark shit too. femdom/cuckold/submissive shit, and it's really fucking me up

No lie. I have still been fapping regardless of my long and rather eloborate response.

Only once a day on most days of the week. I guess even with porn, I still couldn't quit cold turkey. Kinda like slowly easin off of it. I get a strong urge to "use" in the morning and just say well, it's only gonna be once. Then I seriously have to abstain myself from going on with another session.

Behaviors like this strongly resemble to people who have druga addictions. The fact that even though we are not physically consuming anything, our brain still delivers massive amounts to dopamine, and once we develop a tolerance, we have to up our dosage or use something much stronger.

Even though I'm a hypocrite, somethin to think about.

UnrelentingAlpha wrote: Behaviors like this strongly resemble to people who have druga addictions. The fact that even though we are not physically consuming anything, our brain still delivers massive amounts to dopamine, and once we develop a tolerance, we have to up our dosage or use something much stronger.

That's because it's not the drugs that are the problem, but the disease of addiction, which is the same whether it manifests into smoking crack or playing video games. Trust me I've been addicted to alcohol, drugs and a lot of seemingly benign things too and the compulsive thought process is the same. It's kind of scary actually. However, as long as you don't take drugs you can make a change. For me fapping kinda decreases my sex drive so it's self-limiting to an extent. If I fap a lot, I won't wanna watch much porn for a couple of days. Sometimes I still do it and fap with a limp dick desperately trying to cum which is kinda pathetic.

Terminator wrote: Sometimes I still do it and fap with a limp dick desperately trying to cum which is kinda pathetic.

We have too much in common

I have been NoFap for 1,5 months. Recently I caved in a bit and watched some porn and masturbated for a short period but did not finish. What I noticed is that porn is not as powerful for me as it used to be. It has more of a neutral effect, it's very mildly arousing.

What I noticed is that there is 2 types of arousal, physical and mental. Physical is when you get an urge to fap, porn or no porn and mental is when you think, damn I want to fuck that girl. People with ED can get mental but not physically aroused. What I noticed is that porn deprivation makes me more susceptible to normal triggers, short skirts, cleavages, etc. whereas with porn, normal stuff don't do it for me.

Right now my arousal is kicking in, but it's weird, because I see the girls on the sidebar and my heart is rushing, whereas before they did nothing for me, but mentally I have no desire to fap.

Porn is a hard thing to balance. I noticed my body has both needs. The physical needs are easily served since I do PE, but the mental ones are harder. Without a girl, there is no release for those desires and it creates a weird sensation of having no emtional release. It is more about touching and stuff.

What I know is that porn does not make it better. The reason I can go 1,5 months with NoFap is because I know that cumming won't solve my problems, it only makes them worse. It's like healing the pain of a wound by injecting heroin, you make things worse in the long run. The physical needs might be served, but the mental ones are worse. The feeling of loneliness is 10 times worse after cumming to porn, which is why I don't feel the desire to do so.

There is no escape from this but having sex with a real girl. My only advice is concentrate on your goals with abandon. That is the only thing that eases it for me. By knowing I have no release but a real girl, I am working 150% times harder to bring the day it happens quicker.

So the rush you feel from seeing arousing images is not bad, just don't cave an watch porn, don't take the easy way out, it's not worth it. As soon as you feel the need for porn or fapping, hit the gym, do pushups or take cold showers, or do something else useful but hard. Instead of porn, hit on girls. That is the only thing that really helps.

Good luck and stay strong.

Bad news, I went a few months without porn or masturbation before my last lay and still couldn't orgasm. I couldn't stop making out with her but then when I actually fucked her it was just ~2 hours of frustration (and half time I was thinking "maybe I should grunt more," probably a bad sign.) All these "my sex drive would be out of control without porn" posts are making me think I have a bigger problem.

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I dunno, I got my dick out without really thinking about it both times but then when I put it in I started to get worried.

Think you have a lack of experience in getting sex intercourse that is why it seems you are really excited and get you fall with the porn video you're watching.