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How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale...

TOPIC: How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale...

How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 11 Nov 2019 04:35 #323484

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So I started talking to a chick from tinder a few weeks ago. Once I got the conversation to click, it went very well. She was sending lots of nudes and always hitting me up. A few days before we actually met up, the texting was getting kind of stale, which led me to think she was going to flake.

I ended up going straight to her place last Friday to hang out with her and her neighbor to drink/watch movies. After the cockblock friend finally went to sleep, she and I had sex twice. She finished the first time, not sure about the second. Woke up the next morning and left. Texted her an hour after I left, thanking her for having me over and I had a good time with her and left it at that.

She initiated conversation later that night and we had some small talk but it has basically gone back to being bland texts like right before our meetup.

I'd definitely like to see her at least a few more times. This is my first hookup in the past two years, not counting on again off again fwb... but feel this texting situation is going to end up costing me, that and her cock block friend. She definitely wants to keep things casual, as she just went through a divorce but felt from our talks she would be into seeing me more than once. Any ideas on how to liven things up or at least patch it up until I can meetup with her again next weekend?

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How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 11 Nov 2019 04:44 #323486

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It took me a long ass time to find this chick lmao. I am meeting another girl tomorrow which also fell into my lap, but she's super needy and tbh probably too big for me lol. We'll see.

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How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 11 Nov 2019 07:49 #323488

You don't have to "liven things up" or court her with your Awesome Text Game™. She'll either want to see you again, or she won't - you don't need to do anything exceptional, mate.

I'm assuming you've already sent her a text saying "I had a lot of fun last night". Just text her now, "Free Saturday night at 6pm?"
If she says she's not free, offer another time.
If she's not free then either, say "Ok, when are you free?"

That's it. Having long text conversations won't get you any closer to banging her again. Wasting several hours of your life texting her just shows her - and more importantly, shows yourself - you've got nothing better to do.

I know you're new to this ("this is my first hookup in the last 2 years") and anxious to see her again. Just take a deep breath, send her a text asking if she's free Friday/Sat, and meet her if she's free. Then distract yourself (by keeping busy) so you're not just sitting around anxiously waiting for her reply.

Read this:
killtheinnerloser.com/talking-with-girls-isnt-making-progress/
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Last edit: by KillYourInnerLoser.

How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 11 Nov 2019 11:27 #323492

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Not sure why you feel you it's necessary to send texts in the first place.

It sounds like you're going to fuck this up by sending needy text messages.

You ever think that maybe she just thinks you're attractive, doesn't want to send text messages, and just wants to meet up and have sex?

Sounds like to me you should be texting this girl for one reason and one reason only: setting up times to hang out and that's it.

The only time I send repeated messages to a girl is when she and I are just naturally vibing through text messages. If she seems disinterested or sends bland messages, I just pitch the meet-up and that's it.
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How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 11 Nov 2019 13:54 #323494

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I had meant that we were vibing a lot via text the first two weeks (didn't meet up with her for that long due to logistics on her end), then it died down before our meetup. I'm still learning how to walk the tightrope of not letting them get bored in between meetups, but not overdoing it. So it's Monday now, I figured trying to go for meetup thur/fri night via text this early may not pan out or seem needy. Should I just ask her tonight or wait a day or two? Really appreciate the input.

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How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 11 Nov 2019 16:12 #323498

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Just hit her up and she said she's not free to hang out at her place because of the kid, even though before she mentioned movie dates were all she could do when she had her kid. Oh well lol.

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How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 11 Nov 2019 17:27 #323500

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Sounds like you're messing around with the wrong type of woman to begin with. 1) she has terrible logistics, and 2) she has a kid.

I spend zero time convincing or persuading women to hang out with me, or "keeping them warm," as some guys might call it.

She should either be excited to chill with you or not at all. I'd say next this girl man.

Hit on 5 women today and do a Tinder boost tonight.

Tinder Boost is sick, I did one last night and got 21 matches while selectively swiping. Seems like Sunday night at 10:00pm is the best time to do it in my opinion.
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How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 11 Nov 2019 20:03 #323502

Let them get as bored as they want in between meetups.

Are you trying to be a dancing clown, or have sex?

Being entertaining doesn't increase your chances of getting laid.
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Last edit: by Bad Idea Bear.

How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 11 Nov 2019 21:50 #323506

"I'm still learning how to walk the tightrope of not letting them get bored in between meetups, but not overdoing it. "

Dude, you've been indocrinated with pickup artist bullshit. It's not your job to keep her entertained during the week - that's what her friends are for, mate. You're not her, as BadIdeaBear puts it, "dancing clown".

Keep texts to logistics only (until you've had sex with the girl a couple of times, then it's normal to start texting more and have a bit of a friendship & eventually a relationship if you want it - just don't force the texting because you think you have to)
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Last edit: by KillYourInnerLoser.

How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 13 Nov 2019 07:30 #323544

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Alright, attached pic of our last conversation on Monday - going to hit her up tonight (wednesday) and see what happens.

https://ibb.co/CBdXjNx

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How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 13 Nov 2019 07:35 #323545

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Rousseau wrote: Sounds like you're messing around with the wrong type of woman to begin with. 1) she has terrible logistics, and 2) she has a kid.

I spend zero time convincing or persuading women to hang out with me, or "keeping them warm," as some guys might call it.

She should either be excited to chill with you or not at all. I'd say next this girl man.

Hit on 5 women today and do a Tinder boost tonight.

Tinder Boost is sick, I did one last night and got 21 matches while selectively swiping. Seems like Sunday night at 10:00pm is the best time to do it in my opinion.


You're right, this type of girl I'd want to be with long term. But I enjoyed her company and the sex was pretty good. She lives relatively close and doesn't have kids every other week. So if I could hang out with her at least a few more times, I'd like to do so. If I next her, it will probably realistically be quite a while before I find another. Plus, this is good practice.

I used tinder boost last night, 2 matches lol. Used a tinder boost year back, 18 matches... nothing came of that though. I'm on FB dating right now, tons of matches but hard to make anything out of them. My text game probably just sucks, idk.

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How Can I Retain This Girl? Texting Getting Stale... 13 Nov 2019 09:09 #323549

Cool man, now just hit her up again before Thurs (maybe Wed night) and see if she's free thurs.
Andy / 32yo / Australia
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