TOPIC: How do I tell a girl I'm seeing other girls?

Some of you may have read my last post, but I'm dating a great girl right now. It's more of an open situation.

I've been on okcupid lately and started texting three different girls (one that I'm meeting tomorrow).

One of these girls made a joke that went along the lines of:
"Maybe that's why you're single"
"Who says I'm single? "
"Well, I would hope so."

I know that she was probably referring to me not having a girlfriend and cheating on her (which would be shitty.)

I forsee this conversation coming up though - she's a bit older than me at 33, and maybe old fashioned.

If it comes up, what would you guys suggest saying? Something like Chris recommended a long time ago like "I like the way things are going right now and I don't want to mess it up with labels" or something?

How long, and how serious with the current girl?

What about just being straight and saying, "I've been dating another girl but we both date other people, (and maybe a real key addition)...and it's been working really well."

That last part could spark some curiosity instead of instant rejection.

Ultimately you have to decide, do you downplay other women as casual dating? Be totally honest? Or just keep secrets and juggle a few women?

About a month. And it's decently serious - good connection, sex, feelings, etc etc.

Yeah what you said is actually a good way to put it. I suck at lying or keeping secrets like that.

I don't think I'd bring it up on my own, and maybe wouldn't talk about it until pressed.

I just got out of a relationship where things were good....However we recently broke up and while I had my aggressive tendencies we ultimately we ended things because she found a text from another woman. It's a long story for another time(in my upcoming book) but in the mean time I will give you some advice that my OG pimp/player friend told me a couple of weeks ago.

his words: "I'm going to give you the game, because I am getting older....The best thing you can do with these girls is be honest with them....If you want to talk to other girls and hook up with other girls thats fine...but you need to tell her that in so many words" Don't get in a relationship or lead her on that you want a relationship and then you fuck around and talk to other girls"

When he told me this it sunk in like a ton of bricks. Yes granted when me and this girl hooked up we decided to be exclusive and honestly after my EX before her I wanted a happy, loving and stable relationship...and I had that for a little bit....but aside from our silly fights, her jealousy and other things on my part....ultimately "searching" for other women as she put...was her "official" reason

Just tell her straight up.... I really enjoy talking with you and spending time with you...but I am not ready to settle down...but I am open to it if the right women....if thats what you feel....just using that as an example....

IT doesn't sound like you are ready to be exclusive with this girl so tell her that in so many words.

My experience is just that man...over the last 9 months I've been with a fair number of woman but the last 6 months I have been in "mini relationship" of exclusivity....but with this last break up it has made me realize that deeper desire in my heart at this time is not to be in a relationship but to continue to travel, get rich(job, online income, videos, book, blog etc) and live a truly MAXED out player lifestyle.

While still enjoying the nectar of sweet, loving, feminine, sexy woman but absolutely no more relationships....No more serious long term relationships until I am truly ready to settle down, have kids and start a family.....At best I will maintain a few lovers who move beyond just a ONS

Relationships are good for experience don't get me wrong...I learned a lot about myself but it also gave me invaluable clarity of the direction I seek to take my life in

TLDR: BE honest with yourself first then be honest with her....IF you lose her at least you were honest.

Wow that was a fantastic reply!

Yeah I’m at the stage where I love having connections with beautiful caring women but I don’t want to just see one because I love people! Also not so sure anymore I want kids - or to be married.

It’s funny, it’s almost a double standard with me. I wanna see other people but if she mentions someone she sees off and on I don’t love to know. Maybe that can just be private information. Or maybe I need to realize that no one can be someone’s 100%. Like really realize (cause that is basically how I feel about it).

Personally when I like a girl and decide to make her my girlfriend, I lay everything out on the table and tell her exactly what's up - I'll be hitting on other girls and having sex with other people. Mind you, I've only made 1 girl my girlfriend in the last 2 years, the rest have all been fuckbuddies, so I'm new to the girlfriend/boyfriend side of things.

As for the NEW girls, I don't tell them anything. If they directly ask me (which NONE ever do, girls usually rather just not know that stuff) I tell them "Yeah of course I see other people".

I literally walk up to girls on the street during the day and directly hit on them. They'd be fucking idiots to think I don't do that with other girls; if I did it to them, of course I'm doing it to other girls.

That almost never happens though, like I said they never bring it up.

Don't overthink it. Just deal with the situation when (if) it happens.

That's some good advice. I guess that most girls will assume you're seeing other girls unless they lock you down.

At some point, I'd like to get good at cold approaching but in due time.

Also, side note, if that picture if of you-you're styling big time!

Re: cold approach, have you checked out the approach anxiety program on here?

Cheers man, that pic is me. Still got a hell of a long way to go, most guys on here are buff as hell and I can't even bench my bodyweight :\ Gotta pack on a lot more muscle.

I like the "I see other people" because it's quite vague. It doesn't explicitly mean sex. She can justify in her head whatever she wants. One true axiom in many areas of life is "the less words the better".

Say the truth in a way that's simple and vague.

"I want to be with you but I want my freedom too."

There's a million ways to let her know.