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This is going to be my log for my self-improvement to becoming an alpha male. I'm going to write here every day or every other day about my penis enhancement routine and my weight lifting and diet goals. Today I woke up, burned some kratom, went to the kitchen and started cooking some steel-cut oats to start my day off. I've finished them and now I'm gonna let it settle for a while so I can go lift weights.
The last time I lifted weights I did so with such intensity that I could barely walk. I'm talking I was in very bad pain. I'm gonna try to keep it a little lighter so I don't fuck myself up so bad. I figure I'd start off with full body work outs at first 3 times a week because I'm an ectomorph and I need to stick to compound movements. I weighed myself on an empty stomach and I weighed 138 pounds. I'm a little fucker hahaha. I need carbs and more carbs. Last night I fixed a shit load of pinto beans, organic brown rice, baked chicken and some pasta. I'm gonna take 4 meals to work and eat them at my breaks and lunch. I'm not really counting calories exactly. I'm just trying to eat as much as I can and as healthily as I can. I'm also gonna drink a gallon of water per day. It's pretty easy to do actually. For me all it takes is having a big ass cup.
After my work-out I'm gonna hop in the shower and use the Bathmate X30 for around 8 to 10 minutes with no boner to a semi. I was using it with a full erection, but I took a good 2 months off and I need to get it used to the pressure again. I'm on week 3 and I might start using a full boner again here very soon. I have a valve replacement pack for my Xtreme that's on the way and I'll fix it when it gets here.
I'm on the look out for a place that I can rent. I need one so I can go out and talk to girls and have a place to bring them back to. I'll have to get all of that figured out. The last girl I fucked I took to a hotel and I don't want to do that shit again. It's worth it, but it's ridiculous.
I'd say I'm gonna be pretty fucking successful with my goals in a years time. That's a whole year of lifting weights regularly, eating a good clean diet, using the Bathmate and jelqing and stretching, and I hope to have brought home and fucked at the very least 7 girls. I'll keep it to a bare minimum of 7 for a starting point. My goal is to bring home at least one girl per month, but I do need my own place to start doing that. I figure 7 girls in a year is a good bare minimum. Here's to becoming an Alpha.
Today was a good day. In fact, today was one of the best days I've had in a very long time. I just felt so alive and so fucking good. It's because I simply started doing something with my life. I'm actually trying to improve myself and I know that I'll achieve everything I want. I've already got it mentally. Now I need to make it a reality. I ate all 4 meals that I took to work, drank at least a gallon of water, used the Bathmate for 10 minutes with no erection to a semi-erection, did my kegels and read up on some self-improvement material. I fucking got shit done today son. Tomorrow is a rest day, but I might do some jelqing and stretching. I'm not sure yet. I might just sit on my ass and read. Anyway, one day down.
Glad you had an awesome day and feel full of motivation - use that to start building habits you can easily keep up every day. You'll be successful by consistent daily effort - rather than motivation/willpower/excitement.
At some point, self-improvement loses its initial excitement and starts getting actually hard - which is when most guys quit. That's when the habits you've build will see you through the "pain period". It's when you DON'T feel motivated to go to the gym that you need to go the most.
That makes a lot of sense. Willpower can only get you so far and it's always easiest to do something when you've first started because it's fresh and exciting. I understand that eventually I'm gonna have a day where I just don't want to do anything, but I will. I'm gonna make this shit a habit like you said. When I wake up the absolute first thing I do (after fixing my kratom of course) is I get my little oatmeal pot ready and start boiling some water for my first meal. I think it really will help me stay productive. No matter how I feel I should get up and start fixing my oatmeal so I can get to doing something and that should keep me productive.
I think coming here and writing in my log will keep me motivated as well. I also journal outside of here and that helps. I know I have a long road ahead of me and this shit isn't gonna happen overnight. I'm looking at a good year before I really start seeing great results from lifting weights and probably 6 months or more to see permanent results from penis enhancement. As far as bagging some girls I already know I'm capable of getting laid, but I don't have the confidence to know that I can get laid whenever I want because I'm still inexperienced. I'm still working on getting my own place and even then I might have to deal with approach anxiety, but I'll get through it because I want it that bad. Thanks for the advice Andy.
Today is day 2. I'm still feeling motivated, but I know that shit isn't gonna last forever. I'm gonna enjoy the excitement while it lasts. I weighed myself as soon as I woke up and I weighed 136. That's two pounds less than yesterday. I know it can fluctuate, but I'm not sure what to think of it. The only difference between weighing myself yesterday and today was that yesterday I weighed myself after drinking my kratom. Today I weighed myself on a completely empty stomach. Regardless, I'm gonna try to step up the calories a bit. I still need to do a little more research on gaining weight. I really don't care to be this huge muscle guy, but I want to be in great shape. If I had to pick a physique that I'd like to have I'd say I wouldn't mind looking like Shane from the Walking Dead. He's not huge, but he looks strong and he's in great shape. I'm mainly focused on looking good honestly. I want to have a great looking body for girls, but also for myself. I want to look in the mirror and really admire what I've got going on.
I might do some jelqing and stretching today. I have to be honest, it's so boring compared to using the Bathmate, but I'm still gonna do it. I'll probably go to the bathroom, warm up for 15 minutes and do 10 minutes of jelqing and 10 minutes of stretching while I listen to Chris's new pod cast with Derek from more plates more dates. It's crazy hearing that he's married, but I'm truly happy for him. Dude is probably my main role model. He's a legend.
Coming here and logging is very beneficial for me. Not just because it's me being productive, not just because it allows me to type out what I'm doing to improve myself, but I've noticed a big motivator is coming here and seeing random pictures of hot ass girls. It really inspires me to keep going and work even harder so I can get out there and get some hot ass pussy. It's so inspiring to come here and see a picture of a gorgeous girl with a perfect ass. It reminds me of why I'm wanting to do this and it strives me to push myself further so I can pull some girls like that and have lots of fun.
Don't worry too much about daily fluctuations in your weight. Just look at weekly or biweekly trends and see if you need to adjust your calories. But do weigh yourself before eating or drinking anything, and ideally after you take a shit. You'd be surprised how much the water from your kratom drink can weigh. I'm attaching my weight gain/loss chart from the last year+. You can see the fluctuations. And some of them were pretty wild, even week over week. If I worried about making changes based on day-to-day differences in weight I never would've gotten anywhere.
Everybody wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to die.
I think I did even better today. I ate more calories today than I did yesterday. I added in another meal of oatmeal with milk and peanut powder. Fucking delicious honestly. Another gallon of water, kegels, and I jelqed and stretched for 10 minutes each earlier. I warmed up for 15 minutes before hand. I don't play when it comes to jelqing or stretching. With the Bathmate I'll warm up even though I'm not sure if it's entirely necessary, but with jelqing and stretching I give my dick and balls plenty of time to warm up. I just don't want to risk an injury. I'm still talking to my first fuck buddy and I'm gonna try to fuck her brains out this weekend. I could definitely use some pussy. Anyway, another day down. Tomorrow is my next workout. I was a little sore today, but it wasn't too bad. I'll use the Bathmate again tomorrow and I might take Thursday and Friday off. I haven't decided yet.
It's really fucking insane how much different I feel. Before I started lifting and doing penis enhancement again I was getting stoned every single day. I felt like I had to. Weed is an amazing drug, but for me personally it is terrible. It makes me so fucking lazy and unproductive and it even gives me bad paranoia and anxiety, but I would still enjoy smoking it and just sitting on my ass. I knew I needed to get rid of it, but I just couldn't seem to. Now I can't imagine smoking pot. I truly don't want to. I know it would interfere with my goals. I still feel so alive. I know it's not gonna last forever, but I'm gonna enjoy it while I'm feeling it. Time to go to sleep and make another day my bitch.
I just had a pretty intense workout. Today I woke up and I just wanted to keep sleeping, but I got my ass up, went and weighed myself (I was 138 today), I took my kratom and started cooking my oatmeal. After I lifted weights I drank a protein shake and I went to use the Bathmate, but I was having trouble with it. I'm still using no erection to a semi erection, but I noticed that my dick would keep sticking to the side of the Bathmate. Is this safe? It just doesn't seem like a good thing. No matter what the fuck I did, the head of my dick would stick to the side when I'd pump it and it wouldn't let go. Maybe I should clean it? I got my replacement valve for my Xtreme, so I'm gonna fix that probably tomorrow. It's just so weird though. I can't get it to not stick to the side. Goddamn it pissed me off because I was afraid to use it. Anyway, I'll figure it out. Now I'm off to work and all I have to do now is eat my calories. I can't see my fuck buddy this weekend because I'm not free Sunday and she's not free Saturday. We've agreed to next week or next weekend. All I know is I'm gonna fuck the shit out of her next time I see her.
There is no "alpha", there's only guys who do what they want. I know what you mean by your title (you want to be more confident, more masculine, more aggressive, more successful, etc). But putting a label on it doesn't help, because it makes it binary - you're saying "You're either an alpha winner, or a beta loser. As you progress through this self-development journey, you're going to find life is a lot more grey and rarely black or white.
Essentially by saying" I want to be an alpha", you're saying "I'm a beta loser right now". Which isn't the case. You're just a guy who's at the start of his self-improvement journey. And when you get further down the track, you'll be "a guy who's further along with his self-improvement journey".
There's a tonne more I can write on this. I'll write an article on this today/tomorrow and post it here.
Damn that makes sense man. I guess by "alpha" I just meant a better version of what I have been. I really am the same guy I've always been. I'm just making more of an effort to fix my self and my life. I'll definitely give that article a read if you post it. I noticed Derek mentioned you in his podcast with Chris. I heard your name and thought that was pretty cool. It's good to be a part of this community. I'm definitely gonna stick around here for a long time. I'm always open to taking advice if you're willing to give it. I have a lot to learn and a lot to accomplish.
I had a good workout today. I ate all my meals and drank my water. Work kinda sucked, but it's a job. I was a little stressed out today if I'm being honest. I felt a little rushed before I left the house. When I got home I got my valve replacement kit for my Xtreme and I still didn't fix the fucking thing. That really bummed me out and put me in a bad mood, but I know I'll fix it. It's all good. I'm still doing pretty good with my self-improvement. I'd like to have some more time to read though. I'd really like to sit on my ass and read something to improve myself or even just read period. Maybe this weekend.
Tomorrow I'm gonna cook some more food and that's about it. I'm gonna try to use the Bathmate, but I'm gonna clean it first. It's so weird how my dick will stick to the side of it. I'm not sure if it's a bad thing, but it just seems odd. I know once I start using a boner it won't matter at all. Anyway, another day down.
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