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Ever feel like something's just not right? You know what you have to get done, but you just can't because there's this transparent feeling of unease that holds you back from doing what you need to do.
Is it fear? Is it my environment? Am I depressed? I'm honestly 99% positive I'm not depressed anymore because I know exactly how that feels. This is a different feeling. I constantly feel like I'm doing something wrong or that I'm taking the wrong path in life. I don't feel like I can be productive until I fix this. Should I change my major? Transfer schools? Dump my friends? I enjoy my major and I think it fits me well. My school is perfect for that career path, although in the end I want to be an entrepreneur. So I'm starting to think the problem is my friends. They're good guys but all they do is sit around, watch TV, and smoke weed. I'm set to live with them next year too so it's a hard situation to go about leaving. We don't really hang out with anyone else, just sit in our apartment all day and do nothing. Because of this I don't really have any other good friends, just acquaintances. Lots of times I'll want to go out but they won't want to approach and will just go home after 20 mins and smoke weed and say that the scene sucks. OF COURSE IT SUCKS IF YOU SIT IN THE CORNER. I don't even smoke weed anymore; I quit because it was a waste of time/money and my grades were slipping. I just don't know how to go about finding new friends who have similar interests as me. I want to chill with people who are all about lifting, making money and who will actually approach girls with me. Do I just ask an acquaintance if I can chill with them and pregame? Is it that simple? Will it be weird if I'm the odd man out in the clique? I also don't want to drop my roommates as friends completely, but they'll probably think it's weird that I am going to drink with other people. I know I would if one of them did it. I'm afraid they might take it personally or something. I don't know man, I'm all out of whack here..Any advice would be appreciated... |
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K dot I have had a bit of experiance with this sort of friend group. Stoners that want nothing and will laugh when you lift and try to get girls. Honestly I would say recycle them and move on. I would not live with them next year. You can still hang out sometimes and if they're emotionally healthy they will still be okay with you.
With finding new friends your idea sounds great ask someone you kind of know to chill before a party and pregame with them or just go to a party and start talking to everyone. If you find someone you would be cool with take their number. A place where I've met some good friends is the gym basically you just see a guy a few times ask him for a spot or to work in, and start talking. Or your resting beside someone a few times start talking to him. Then start saying hi to them when you see them at the gym after a few times ask him to hit up a party or bar with you or to go get a post workout meal. Your room mates will not find it weird to go drinking with other people, you are allowed to do whatever you want to do. It is your life and is to short to worry about what your room mates think. Lays: 20
Goal: 25 Lays |
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Subscribed to this post. Today i had same revelation as you guys. Its so damn frustrating dumping one and hanging with others in the same uni
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I had very good friends for many years. But still, everytime we went out and did something I didn't feel good. It always felt like something was missing, like I'd rather do something else, like I'm wasting my time. It took a long time until I noticed: All my friends are living the standard script for life, a script I could never relate to. It's just not my thing. Sometimes I tried talking to them and explaining stuff, but they never got it. I liked those guys. I really did. Which made it much harder to get rid of them. I started doing stuff with them less and less and noticed how much my overall happiness increased. Fastforwards 1 or 2 years: I barely have any contact with my old social circle, and for many months I was totally alone... but it didn't bother me. Took some time to gain a few new friends (A lot of time, since I'm picky...), but now I feel a lot more like the person I WANT to be, rather than the person I thought I had to be when I was around my old friends. You noticed something is wrong. Take action. It may be uncomfortable for a time, and maybe you will feel guilty for ditching your friends, but that will fade. Also, if you stick with people that aren't like you it's pretty certain that at some point THEY will move on with their life and leave you behind. Happened to me more often than it should have until I finally learned my lesson. Also, an example on one of the little things that changed but made all the difference: When I was in a club with my old social circle they would hang around the bar and just drink, drink, and drink more. It was funny, yes, but if you wanted to go on the dancefloor they would make fun of you, or they would just look at you in a way that made you feel ashamed for wanting to have fun that didn't consist of purely drinking a lot of alcohol. It was "discouraged", so to say, as they made fun of people enjoying themselfes on the dancefloor. Nowadays when I'm at a club with my new social circle they rather tend to make fun of the people that stand in the corners doing nothing but sipping on their drinks. When we go to clubs and parties we ARE the freakin party. If there's not much going on WE change that and encourage people to have a great evening. Things like that make me think that it was one of the best decisions of my life to ditch my old, good friends. Goals for 2015:
Goals for 2015/2016: -Reach 98kg bodyweight (91/98kg) -Keep a healthy attitude despite chronic pain -Find a new job -Start approaching |
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Last edit: by Half a Hero.
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How did you start with your new friends, how did you met them? |
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I started doing more stuff with my brother and going to different clubs, different bars and different parties. Meeting new people is easiest when going to new places. It was a slow process. One time we went to a bar, I drunkenly started to talk with some random girl, got invited to a birthday party and met new people there. A few weeks later I'd meet those guys from the birthday party in a club by pure coincidence, etc, and over time new friendship develops. I didn't actively try to make new friends. (I did in the beginning, but that was useless, didn't work.) I just went out, had fun, talked to people and let time do it's thing.
Goals for 2015:
Goals for 2015/2016: -Reach 98kg bodyweight (91/98kg) -Keep a healthy attitude despite chronic pain -Find a new job -Start approaching
The following user(s) said Thank You: $$$$
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Last edit: by Half a Hero.
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