TOPIC: Guys Who Have Stepped Up Their Looks: Is the Average Person Intimidated By You?

I have hit it hard at the gym the last 1.5 years and have gone from above average in looks to handsome (at least based on what the women are telling me now).  But one thing I have noticed is that average people no longer want to be around me.  Here are several examples:

1) I used to talk to an average looking woman in my building, not macking, just general conversation in the elevator.  Now, she barely says 2 words to me (and it looks like she gained some weight).
2) A new trainer at the gym saw a shirt I had with my college name on it.  She is average looking at best.  I had a couple of genuine conversations with her, as the college is far away.  Later on I was lightly teasing her and the interaction has never been the same.
3) I went to a bachelor party for an Indian friend of mine.  I was the only white dude there.  My buddy gets drunk and starts dissing white people (unprovoked), with unfounded insults like I am cheap (not true) and other bullshit.  It was his weekend, so I just blew it off to his tremendous insecurity…..we used to be college goofballs….funny thing is when nobody else was around he said I have never looked better, ha!


I have more examples, but I could care less about the caliber of women in examples 1 and 2.  I am just wondering if other people are experiencing this.  I have always been a cocky/teasing type of guy, but I wonder if it just comes off as being an asshole (and not in a good way).  I still have some PUA brainwashing in my head, but I am wondering if cutting out all the teasing when the attractive levels are so different is the right thing to do if I wanted to connect more.

Regarding #3, I have known this person for a long time, so I won’t cut him out of my life.  But if I were to meet a guy like him at this stage of my life, we wouldn’t be friends

I'm not sure of your question.

Some people will look at someone attractive, who is sarcastic and teasing, be retarded, and assume they're an asshole.
In my mind that's their loss, cause it's just them being an idiot.

My question is as you step up your looks, is the average person less engaging with you, as you step way out of average person status?

I've noticed this with other guys I associate with the most.

I'm not perfect, looks or physique-wise but I've managed to work on it enough to the point where I'd consider myself to be well above average (at the moment), and at other times in the past.

The bullshit I've gotten from guys is the typical shit a weaker man will do towards someone they see as a threat. A lot of passive-aggressive shit. A lot of calling me a fag for caring about my style/looks/physique (especially when they're under the influence). A lot of trying to knock me down a peg, trying to influence/persuade me to not improve myself or do what's best for me. A lot of that kind of bullshit behaviour especially when they're around other people.

At times when I've been at a higher level, looks/style/physique-wise, I've noticed myself toning down my cocky/teasing attitude a bit and becoming more silent/humble.

There has been a couple of girls that I hooked up with who said they were "intimidated/nervous" to talk/meet/hang out with me. There's been a couple of times where I was approached by girls who later on said "if they weren't drinking, they wouldn't of had the courage to start talking to me" which was kind of a shock to me, but a huge confidence booster at the same time.

From my experiences, I'd say the average person has been less engaging with me as well.

Here is what I have noticed:

First two are bold because this is the overall very common effect, others are very rare and might not have to do with style at all, but I included them for conversation

1)Average men will avoid eye contact and stare at the ground.  Some will look at me but if I look back then they stare right at the ground.

2)Women are way more receptive.  Girls tell me I am hot and fuck me way more often.

3) It is rare, but sometimes the way below average guys, that clearly never get laid will make a comment, I ask them about it, and then they proceed to act as #1 stare at the ground and apologize.  THIS IS VERY RARE.

3) Sometimes I will have guys throw elbows at me / push me  when I am hitting on chicks.  This is pretty rare too, and these guys are super drunk when they do it.  I'm not sure if style has anything to do with this or not.  I just throw an elbow/ push right back, but as hard as possible.  I also stare them dead in the eyes with the look "I will beat the shit out of you little man".  Generally they cower and ask why I was trying to start a fight with them,  I tell them not to fuck with me and they know damn well what they did and they walk away like the fucking cowards that they are.

Like I said, 98% of the difference is 1 and 2, if you are not experiencing those two things post some pics here for help.

1)Average men will avoid eye contact and stare at the ground.  Some will look at me but if I look back then they stare right at the ground.

Concerning this looking at me and then staring at the ground stuff: Do you think these guys are intimidated, feel insecure or is it just a coincidence and does not mean that much? That tends to happen a whole fucking lot since I started looking everyone in the eyes till they look away to the point where I thought that I'm just imagining things.

^Def. Intimidation + Insecurity.  I know this because If I am in the elevator in my building I have to stand next to these people for a long ride.  In "Edgy time to get laid" cloths they are def. insecure and intimidated, in "Work Cloths" they are just casually standing thier.  In both cases, they generally avoid eye contact.

Don't worry so much about the negative in life and focus more on the positive. If people don't want to talk to you anymore, that's fine, just move on friend.

These things are pretty typical.

I have friends that try to bring me down a peg all the time. There are a couple of exceptions (friends who have their shit together), but most of the long-time friends are not doing much to change. They are insecure as hell, and don't like to see a positive change (even sub-consciously).

Had a group of four friends making fun of me the other night about past girl issues. My sister instigated it. This was directly after one of my long-time friends had said "A couple of cute girls just went to the bar, I might go hit on them". I was being extremely confident and outgoing, he was not, so he turned it into a storm of passive aggressiveness. They started giving me shit, using the "We are just kidding" disclaimer to try and dull it (their biting comments and my personality). They were uncomfortable with my vibe, because it did not mix with their own (quiet, subdued, conforming).

I just shrugged (I could hear them, but wasn't listening), got up, and went and talked to a cute girl that was sitting at the table next to us.  ;D

Want to make your wimpy (full of shit) friends really uncomfortable (and quiet)? After they start throwing passive aggressive insults at you, do what they say they can do (but know that they can't). Even my sister was nicer to me when I got back to the table haha  ;D

Other popular ones:

"I could kick your ass" (my best friend who is 100 lbs heavier than me typically uses this one) my response: "Probably." He likes to use this one when girls are around (and he's drunk).

"(Something about) being ugly" (used by uglier people in the circle, typically in obvious satire) my response: "Only on my bad days.  "

"Remember (one of the girls that didn't work out)?" (used by guys who aren't having sex and are trying to make me lash out, something I did a lot when I was still chubby and unattractive). my response: "Who?"

Do what Chris says, and do what you want. If their comments bother you, tell them. If you know the root of their comments are based on deeply-rooted issues, than ignore them. Either one works 

1)Average men will avoid eye contact and stare at the ground.  Some will look at me but if I look back then they stare right at the ground.
2)Women are way more receptive.  Girls tell me I am hot and fuck me way more often.

Guys:As I've become more muscular/attractive, I've had to START conversations more often with guys.  You can be masculine/confident and friendly at the same time, and I've found that people will generally open up once you start the conversation and they realize you're not going to be a dick.

Ladies: With women, I'm approached more than before, kind of the opposite, but women will apologize to me more often- like if they stutter, drop something, or get in my way.  Basically, they will put themselves out there by smiling or looking my way, maybe say hi, but it's still up to me to start an actual conversation.

Cliffs: The more attractive you become, the more it's your job to start conversations (if you want the conversation).

^pretty spot on, people are super receptive once I talk to them as well.

Interesting, i've noticed when i've been out recently i've had girls bumping into me when there was definately space and saying sorry.. one of them I jokingly go "so you should be" and she stopped and stood there with her mouth open like "oh my god I can't believe he said that".  ;D

But i've observed a similar thing with some girls and I was thinking it's for a different reason atleast for me. There is a couple of girls who used to talk to me and be friendly when I was more overweight and now that i've lost alot of weight and put on muscle they don't want to talk to me anymore and act weird.

My theory was that before I wasn't really a threat, I was just this fat guy and was pretty harmless to them so they would talk to me as a friend and now all of a sudden it's like i'm a bit of a sexual threat and they haven't seen me in this way before so they aren't sure how to react.

I'm unsure about what my level of attractiveness is now. I know I was getting talked about at the gym by 3 girls near me last night, I heard them going "that guy who is stretching now" but didn't hear the rest.