TOPIC: Advice on 2nd and 3rd dates

Ya definitely. So the girl I went on a date recently asked me via text if I am like looking to mess around or looking for a relationship. We don't text much, she initiates texts and I pretty much talk to her that way. Ofcourse, I didn't say hey I am just looking to fuck any girl I meet.

I feel like after we do have sex or even before that, the whole "what are we" is coming up soon. I am pretty sure she's gonna ask if I am talking to any other girls. How do you guys handle that question?

She's coming over later tonight too.

Also, after lays do you have her sleep over or not for better retention? Usually with me they like to sleep over.

don3 wrote:
Would be interested too to know what you guys respond to that

don3 wrote:
Nice progress man.

When a girl asks me what I'm looking for, I just say that I try to find it along the way, after all, how can you decide beforehand if you don't even know the person with whom you're trying something?

For sleepovers after lays, it's up to you, do as you want and as you like.

I think there's an article of Chris talking about handling the "what are we" thing.
Basically, he advocates somethin' like "what we have is good right now, we'll figure it out along the way/let's not ruin this"
Personally, I let it faze out a bit, or joke back about it and just go on doing my thing, I don't talk about my other girls.
To make myself more clear about the "what are we thing", while most of the times I don't answer them about it, I like to joke about their possible boyfriends and suitors, suggestin' I'm just here to make them blow off the steam and enjoy the wickedness of the flesh.
Funny shit.

If you keep your visits to sex and maybe once in a while, some food/cinema/date, they won't push around the issue for some months.

on the 2nd date you have to pull out the finger blaster 9000 right after wine

your wasting her time if you dont

Me and my mate who also gets laid always say "I'm not looking for anything serious" or "I'm looking for sex, friends with benefits if I like you. I don't like one night stands". But we're both so obviously sexual the question almost never comes up anyway. It's REALLY obvious we want sex.

"Also, after lays do you have her sleep over or not for better retention? Usually with me they like to sleep over."

Fuck no. (I've actually said the words "Fuck no!" when some girls ask). Only girls I really really really really like (eg dating for 3-6 months) get to sleep over.

Do whatever you want though man, honestly. There is no right answer. As Chris says, "Do whatever makes you happy".

But if you're doing it because you think it'll help with retention - it won't necessarily.

---

"Basically, [Chris] advocates somethin' like "what we have is good right now, we'll figure it out along the way/let's not ruin this""

This is one of the few things I majorly disagree with Chris on. Why play games? You're literally screening in girls who like to be lied to, and you're creating a situation where neither of you is honest with each other. Why add unecessary drama?

It's easier to be 100% honest and say "Look, I like sex. I'll never be monogamous. I like you though, and I'm not making any promises but for now I'm happy to keep seeing you. If you're happy to keep seeing me too, we'll do that. If you're ever unhappy, just talk to me and we'll figure it all out. I'm never going to lie to you though or promise you something just to get you to stay. That's retarded."

Boom. Now you're screening in girls who like honesty and will be 100% upfront with you. There won't be any drama, she'll never blow up and say "You led me on!" etc etc.

Again, this is one of the few things I think Chris genuinely could have done better.

I'm a bit split on the issue, it depends on how much of a scumbag you're willing to be, or how good the pussy is, I guess?

'cause in most cases, if you fuck a girl for more then a couple of months, feelings are bound to happen sooner or later, it's chemicals and shit at work.
At that time, a choice has to be made, be honest and maybe lose the pussy, or muddle the stuff and enjoy for a little while longer.
Now, if you have a regular amount of fresh pussy comin' in, it wouldn't be a problem to lose one, but...
Sometimes even ourselves get attached and descend into selfishness and scumbaggery.
Nobody's perfect.
Isn't that why some of us have girls on the side while being in a relationship?
It's life man, things are easy to see but complicated to move on through.

And I think that this way of doin' things for Chris was congruent with the full scumbag living the nightlife of LA/Miami (I don't remember where he was)
Should ask him about that some of these days.

There are other ways, of course, to obtain retention.
On the whole form of things I agree with Andy on the ease of mind honesty procures, it's always better to be upfront about what is wanted and expected (after all isn't that too, the way of GLL?).
And it gets easier when you know you can get pussy anyway.

Thanks for all the responses guys.

Wasn't able to smash, she kept on saying nothing is gonna happen, no sex & just being playful. I think every girl so far in my life where I rubbed them good and/or aggressively kiss them on my bed have been all smashes. Honestly, that being repeated plus same words from last time was killing the vibe for me. Also, last time and this time she said again "you didn't get what you wanted I guess" and I ignored that but maybe I shouldn't have and just pulled her ass out of my house. Just HJ, BJ & cum on tits. Making out she was into that very well and rubbing my dick on her pussy but when it came time for my pleasurement above she acted a bit selfish about that. A part of me is kinda annoyed but a part of me is like this was better than just staying at home watching porn and not having real girl interactions. Not sure at this point, what's next. If she's really saving it for 3rd or 4th date. I'll try to see her again but I know what I gotta do. Talk to more girls and get on other dates which I do have coming up.

Weird too before we met today she was asking me how important is sexual chemistry to me & what part of the female body do you find most attractive; like she wanted my input yet she acted a bit selfish on my bed. Also, I just gave short direct general answers and by the third I said not trying to avoid these questions but rather talk about stuff like this in person.

Edit: We are meeting again tonight, at my place again. If she just wanted to tease me yesterday and just said she was too busy to meet up soon and can't meet up for many days then that's really losing pointers for me. I am already over yesterday and feel better today. Gotta keep on continuing because I could of stopped before somewhere on these tracks and I wouldn't be where I am right now experience wise (personally). Seemed like yesterday was a waste at the time but I looked back recently I had a date where this girl at first glance was waiting outside and was nowhere what she looked like in her profile and was bigger. That was a waste and that girl really just wasted my time not posting recent pics of herself on her profile.

You got your dick sucked, it's always better than masturbation.
Try again, it'll come along the way, girls don't suck dicks they don't want.
Some girls need more time to be comfortable, as you'll get better at screening you'll find the most chill ones easier and quicker.
Yours seems like a bit of a tease, but you did get blown, so to each their own? Haha.

The questions she asked beforehand looks like a tentative bit of foreplay from her.
Some girls are really into it, worth a shot to play around with it.

And do try to get a creep pic, keep it real.

For sure, I actually prefer BJs to finish. Looking back you're right, the girls who were chill, non-chalant, not shy, & very receptive with physical touch were probably the best bangs.

Met tonight with her and got laid. No alcohol too. Just popped a movie, was touchy and no LMR at all which made escalation a breeze.

don3 wrote:
Determination is a motherfucker, the ones who dont make it are the ones who quit...

Boss shit brother!

I tried looking for this question on here. Chick is asking if I was dating other people also? I said I didn't have a problem with it nor if she was with other guys. She asked if I was a open relationship person? Don't know what to say to that and I ignored it and it will come up again soon I bet. She went on saying she's not talking to anyone and she's too busy to go out with non-sense people or someone not worth to invest in. I answered something close to Plisken/killtheinnerloser (Thank btw...seriously). She actually said "ok cool if you say so, maybe some things are better unsaid." I feel like she's going to say later down the line I am not into fwb and this feels like one and what do you say to that?

Have you had a girl flat out say I don't want to see you or keep having sex pretty early? What do you say or where do go from there if she says that? I understand that's always gonna be part of the game but want to stretch this as long as possible before that happens. I kinda wish she was talking, seeing, fucking other guys seriously. No doubt while this is still good, I need to have another girl that I have regular sex with. Working on that.

If she asks again if I am dating other people in a few days or weeks what do you say? Or just keep saying the same stuff from the very beginning? Also, I am planning to go on dates so how do you let her know that? I didn't say I was yet but should I finally answer yes I am dating other people or just scoff it off?

Update:
She went on a tangent and said if I was seeing someone or sleeping with someone whenever I decided to let her know ahead of time because she doesn't want to be kicked to the curve. Is seeing someone and dating different? Is dating the same as just talking to other people and going on dates with them? What does seeing someone really mean?

She did say she has hope with some other guy too but hasn't come by with him. Funny she's talking about her not wanting to be kicked to the curve when I could be too as well knowing this info haha. This all reminds me of a time I was "talking" to this girl who had a bf and it was going south for them. Then she became my gf and when things were going south and broke up she went back to him.