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Sorry, but I do forget (haven't been very active on here for a minute...)
Have you ever had kratom before K Dot? I don't recall you posting much on it, if you have. About a year ago, I broke out of my fear of "sexual anxiety". That was by in large due to the fact that I started having sex on at least a monthly basis, but that didn't start until I had kratom. It will, more or less, destroy your sexual anxiety. Thus allowing you to get you cock up.
Take the 2-3 experiences you had of not being able to get it up due to anxiety, and multiple that by 5-10 and you'll get how many girls I fucked myself over with. At some point around freshman year of college, I just stopped talking to girls entirely because it was so goddamn embarrassing how anxious I was with them. No telling how many girls I missed out on because I couldn't get over "sexual anxiety".
My advice is take a proven, and EASY way out: burn some kratom before your next date.
Kratom allows you to unconsciously block out thoughts/mindsets that would otherwise completely inhibit you. Once you gain exposure to things like SEX while on kratom... you'll find you'll be able to have SEX without having to take kratom. Make sense?
Similarly like if you're afraid of public speaking --- take kratom and go speak publicly. After a few times of that; you'll find that you'll have an easier time speaking in front of others than when you first started.
I finally lost mine not too long ago, and honestly the best thing that helped me was the AA program and also, just as important, listening to Chris' audios that go along with the AA program... as well as every single motherfucking podcast and video Chris has ever put out.
I can look back on myself 1.5 years ago and see how much I've changed even though I have not destroyed AA (in the middle of week 5 right now).
I personally don't think there is an easy fix to this. If you have those mental struggles, you are going to have to climb out of that hole and work on yourself day after day after day.
Just wanted to chime in that I too had some ED problems due to alcohol, and was in bed with girls a number of times before I actually fucked a chick.
Here's what helped me:
1. NoFap (I know some don't agree, but whatever it works well for me)
2. Foreplay with clothes on. If you are hooking up with girls in your car in the winter, this is going to happen. It takes the pressure off you if you are scared of being naked in front of a girl, but you can grab her titties.
Also, kratom, phenibut, and any other social performance enhancing compound you can get your hands on.
EDIT: I met the girl when I was just restarting the AA program when I was drunk and did a basic guy cold approach at a bar, and grabbed her number. Went on a couple dates first. Dont be afraid if she isnt your ideal, and just be open to new experiences.
Life's purpose is growth
Life always moves
Your thoughts are the most powerful thing on this planet... mind your mind!
I would suggest taking it slow with dating for a bit. While most of us enjoy getting ass on the first date, you would benefit from having a date or two... most girls actually seem to expect this? who would have thought? haha
Actually get comfortable with these girls, not so much for them but for yourself. This way, when it comes time to have sex you will be more comfortable and there will be less stress on yourself.
The whole key here is to relax and enjoy the moment. Really, thats it. Also limiting jerking off can help too, so masturbating at most 2x per week might be worth while for you.
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I didn't think the "Get Hung" guide would have girls eyeing my bulge. It did.
I didn't think that your exercise and diet advice would have girls checking me out. It did.
I DEFINITELY didn't think that your hair-loss prevention would fix my hairline. Not in a billion years. It mother fucking did. You saved me a crazy amount of time, a ton of money, unnecessary pain, and destroyed my #1 source of anxiety. DESTROYED IT.
Kratom is next!
To anyone reading this, follow through, read this material, APPLY this material, and enjoy life.