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Found the forum through Kratom. This will be an important step for me to take in my life.
I’m disgruntled and angry. I haven’t had the same motivation I had 5 or 6 years ago. In my late teens and early twenties I was younger and even dumber. Blissfully ignorance to the world still living my careless, childish teenage life into adulthood. I cruised by in life so far but had more drive and confidence in the past. I wasn’t moving up anywhere in life just spinning my wheels without realizing it. I was getting by alright living with my parents then eventually moving out with friends. Working some pretty lame 9-5 jobs however I was partying, having great times and living good. Lots of girls around and life felt like a breeze. There was not many more responsibilities and not much of a transition from high school and college to being an adult for me. I’m well over 27 now. Life just hit me. I’m lost. I’m not a child anymore but I still feel like one and it’s scary. Up to this point I’m renting a place with some friends, I work a decent job, I have a car. However I barely understand anything else and I have no basic life skills either. I’ve been coasting by. I wouldn’t survive living on my own. I don’t understand anything, how anything works. I can’t believe I’ve gotten by this far. You know everything you knew in life when you were 18 or 19? That’s where I still feel I’m at at 27. My life is starting to get tough, confusing. It's scary and I’m afraid it could lead me down a very bad path. I’m becoming more tortured everyday with constant negative thoughts. I'm so dumb, I hate myself, I’m miserable. Who could I be angry at? The education system? I learned nothing from school. Basic math and english skills, the rest was filler long forgotten. My dad who wasn’t there? My mother who raised me to be afraid of everything? Is it me? Did I just sit back and let the last 8 years of my life pass me by? I don’t understand how all the people I came up with, all the friends and people I’ve met my age living the exact same lifestyle as me all these years they still don’t seem as lost and clueless about life. They seem to be living as responsible adults. I’m almost too afraid leave the house at this point I’m so scared of life. Am I a lone hopeless loser? I feel like the whole world and everyone around me is in on the joke except me. I have virtually no skills or valuable education and it’s embarrassing to be this old and feel so immature. I can operate a vehicle. That’s my most impressive skill. Wow. I’m retarded. I don’t have a lot of money at the moment only enough to survive comfortably. ($15,000) I want a job that i actually enjoy working in the film industry in the future but right now I have a higher paying labor job that I need to get started on my nest egg and work towards owning a home. It’s been decent money but I’m hoping to get bigger pay checks down the road and work this mindless job until I’m financially secure. Besides saving money, I need an education in money. I know nothing about saving money or budgeting, etc. They don’t teach you anything about money in school yet they make it out to be the most important thing in life. It's frustrating. I don’t have kids/not married, thank god. I can’t imagine the hole I’d be in under those circumstances. I feel weak and small. I now get anxiety in public because I’m not in as good of shape as I was before so I feel even more venerable since I have no self-defence skills what so ever. I use be in really good shape in my early twenties. I was able to skate by a lot in life because of my physique and my look. Life was easier and a lot of fun and I felt confident. I was getting a ton of pussy. Things we’re unbelievably good at this time. I let myself go and lost what confidence I had. I need to take better care of myself. Quit smoking. I’ve been living like shit and I look like shit. I feel depressed and miserable all the time, the one good thing is I have a pretty exciting social life, I sure most guys my age would give anything to have the social life I live but I have no social skills. I’ve gotten by with drugs and alcohol but at the end of the day I’m quite socially awkward. I can’t relate to anything with anyone in conversation. I feel like the dumbest one in the room. Unless the conversation is about things I like or understand like film, music, weed/drugs, fitness/sports. Otherwise any conversation about pretty much anything else in life I know nothing about so I don’t say much. I need to some how learn how to grow up. It sounds so fucked up to say. Was wondering if anyone out there is in the same boat as me. If there’s any hope for someone like me? Does anyone have any advice for someone this lost? It's really difficult. Thank you Good Looking Loser. The site looks like it can be a lot of help. |
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I just turned 23 and feel this way at times. Super lost in life. Like there are other people out there not giving a shit and just living life.
It's good that you're feeling like this cause I was too. I realized that there is so much more to life and I need to get the ball rolling if I want to experience life more. Those people you see living life aimlessly, cut them off. They're the ones that work for other people, have a boring ass 9-5, get married, kids, 30 yr mortgage and the end. Does anyone really know their life purpose? fuck no. 3 years ago I was partying and just focused on chicks and now these days I'm concerned about my fiances and future. Life changes and really the only thing you can do is do what you want and work on your goals. Stop wallowing in pity and just get out there man. Everyone has 24 hours in a day it just depends on how you use them is what makes you or breaks you. Set goals, smash them and celebrate in moderation, listen to motivational podcasts, start reading more, LEARN NEW SHIT cause it sounds like you just work and then come home and do nothing besides party. also, welcome to the forum my brotha |
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Yeah, I recognize myself from your writing. For me it's because I've been escaping every possible emotion and responsibility into various addictions such as training, pickup, drugs, alcohol, food, internet, what have you. It's only now that I started going to Narcotics Anonymous that I understand I have been an addict all my life; ever since I was a little kid, way before I started using any substances. It's a humbling experience now at the age of 28 to admit that I have no clue who I am, what I want or even how I feel about things. When I feel good I don't know why it is, and when I feel down I have no idea why and I can't make any decisions for myself. I feel like I need someone to tell me what to do at all times because I don't know how to do things for my own good. When I do things I feel like doing I just end up destroying myself. I'm constantly afraid of the future and regretful of the past, and the only thing that brings me a slight sense of security is to keep doing the same routines that I have always done. But at the same time I know if I keep doing that my life will never improve.
Just today my sponsor helped me realize the reason I need to pick up chicks is because I need the validation that I get from them, because I don't accept myself for who I am. I don't get laid because I want to or because it's good for me - rather I approach chicks out of spite, because I have to prove something to myself. That's the same reason I lift weights. I feel un-masculine, unconfident and weak and try to fill that void by making my body strong. But no matter how big or strong I get, I'm never any happier with myself. I've fucked 37 chicks and I still feel like a fucking loser that all chicks despise. That's because as soon as the rush of busting a nut fades, I'm left with myself and I hate myself so much that I can never truly believe anyone could ever love me. That's why I've pushed every GF I ever had away; I had to hurt them before they could get the chance to hurt me. I've never felt love because how could I ever love someone if I don't love myself? But the NA meetings have made me feel a lot better and helped me understand the root cause of my problems. Plus there's tons of guys with the exact same issues and experiences, so it's good to feel I'm not alone.
The following user(s) said Thank You: KeepYourHeadUp
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Last edit: by Terminator.
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Welcome to your quarter life crisis, existential crisis with regrets about your past and questions about your future. I'm in the same boat at age 26, it is something you have to work through and you'll come out of it with a more realistic view of your life. I had a lot of regrets with regards to drug use in the past that threw 4 years of my life away, regrets of failed sports goals and friendships thrown away. I also had big expectations for myself once I graduated college with regards to career and women that I haven't been able to completely live up to, but I learned life didn't fail me I just had to tone my expectations down some.
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I didn't think the "Get Hung" guide would have girls eyeing my bulge. It did.
I didn't think that your exercise and diet advice would have girls checking me out. It did.
I DEFINITELY didn't think that your hair-loss prevention would fix my hairline. Not in a billion years. It mother fucking did. You saved me a crazy amount of time, a ton of money, unnecessary pain, and destroyed my #1 source of anxiety. DESTROYED IT.
Kratom is next!
To anyone reading this, follow through, read this material, APPLY this material, and enjoy life.
Thanks again Chris, life would suck without you.
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