This is an opinion website that offers information of a general nature and none of the opinions should be construed as advice. Nothing contained within the site is the advice, opinion or otherwise the view of any host, owner, server or other provider of services to Good Looking Loser. Nothing stated shall be construed to serve as a replacement for competent advice from professionals.
Affiliate Disclosure: At absolutely no expense to you, if you make a purchase, we may receive commissions from some links on this website. That is how our community supports itself. I don't recommend anything that I have not used personally or believe in. Thanks!
Should I be bringing up topics/asking questions this personal on dates: 1.How many boyfriends have u had? 2.What's the craziest place you've ever had sex? 3.What is your favorite sex position?
nah not really. casual small talk, and get your hands on her, early and often.
the video where I put Nichole on my lap at the grocery store.. its all foreplay.. just do it on your date.
if there was a bed in that grocery store i would have naturally taken her there after I kissed her
less verbal, get at little a physical
you'll really benefit from the BANG HER section.. another guy is yelling at me to work on it, i need to.
just keep doing what you are doing and step it up each time, take a look at the progress you've made... instead of the work you have ahead of you.. you aren't far from turning the corner, let see if we can lock down one /two of these girls as regulars
Please no Private Messages. Post thread on with the word "Chris" or "GLL" in it if you absolutely need to get my input. Thank you for your understanding.
Thanks Chris for helping me shift my focus on the progress steps that I've made so far. I think I, and most people, have a tendency to be too hard on themselves and not celebrate the little victories.
The biggest relationship drama in Horny's life so far went down TODAY on Sunday 21st
Saturday: girl#1 that I've banged twice calls me, but I'm unavailable, so I call later, but she's unavailable. She texts me at midnight: "hey sorry I'm replying this late, I forgot my phone. I ran across something that made me question myself. Do I mean something more to you than just a sexual outlet?" [this is a DTR question, I immediately thought, and didn't want to respond hastily so I go to sleep]
Sunday - today - at 12PM, I get another text from her: "U don't wanna talk to me anymore hehe, that's ok. I'm not gonna hate u for that. I just get the feeling that u are so insecure and messed up. Just another screwed-up kid, maybe got hurt so much that he became hateful and numb, or simply chose a misoriented lifestyle. Just so u know, I wanna make u feel love again if u let me. But if u think I'm so corny and talking BS, nevermind and just be happy with who u are. Hugs, girl#1".
I feel noticeable anxiety after seeing this text and thinking WTF is she saying, that bitch! And thinking what I should do. Well, after meditating for 20mins to calm the fuck down/kill anxiety and watching Chris's retention video
and looking at some of my text notes about handling relationships and bitchiness, I decide to call her around 3PM.
Horny handles bitchiness, DTR talk and retention on the phone:
She violated my boundaries and expectations by calling me this and that over txt, and I don't sacrifice self-respect for pussy, so I had to put her in her place. Basically what I told her over the phone today in about 12mins : "What's going on, are you being your normal self? (yeah, so what've you been doing today) Listen, I have to tell you something: I'm disappointed with the way you're acting, because I told you I don't want any drama between us, I don't like it when you all of a sudden start nagging and making assumptions about whether or not I wanna talk to you like you did today in your text. That's a total turn-off. (oh? I was just expressing my true emotions like people wh have a real connection do) No, that's completely insane. Think about this: what would you think if someone else called you these things? You would feel offended. (blabla what did I say?) You know what you said, and I don't want you saying disrespectful stuff like that to me again. I like the normal sweet side of you more and when we meet in person, I want us to be having fun and be in the moment, not worrying too much about the future, just being like a normal girl and a boy and let's see where it goes, you know? (yeah, but I feel like I don't know you) Can you be more specific?
(you're like a mystery, you don't really open up and talk about yourself and who you are. I want you to be true) Yeah, I like true and authentic, and I want to talk about fun stuff with you. Yeah, it's a given that I wanna do naughty stuff with you in bed, but I also like it when we talk about our thoughts and experiences so we can get to know each other.We had a lot of fun together and we could relax around each other, and I want to see this relationship between us grow naturally. I enjoy hanging out with you when you don't nag but act like a normal girl. That's how I like it to be cos that makes me happy (that's very superficial) So, I feel better for having cleared this up. So, I wanna meet you sometime next week. What days are you free?"
Then she asked if I want to do something today. I told her I was busy. We agreed that I'll call her on a Thursday. Honestly, I feel like I lost any fondness/attraction for her as soon as I got that bitchy text from her, but I could take it or leave it, I don't really care that much seeing as this girl isn't hot/eager/skilled in bed and I've got dates with hotter girls in the pipeline. I felt at times today that I should tell her: "Listen, I don't want to hurt you in any way, so let's end this right now for good".
What do you guys make of this fucking drama? I'm feeling 95% relaxed and over it now, no anxiety anymore, because it's not worth stressing over this. I'm glad to have this as a reference experience in building my character.
Horny, what you need to do when u use your bathmate is this:
touch yourself so you get a boner, then put the bathmate on, and pump it up. the pump will make sure your dick stays hard in there, trust me, its IMPOSSIBLE not to stay hard when you enter erect and pump it up.
the pressure from the bathmate sucks a lot of blood to your cock, thats the whole idea with it !
dont worry, you will find out very soon
Yeah, I wouldn't rely on the bathmate to cure ED. Before I started PE I had never ONCE had a problem with ED. And i was watching porn nearly every single day. For some reason I seem to have very strong PC muscle. (when i was 17 my gf at the time, and i, did an experiement to see how far i could "shoot".... honest to god, it was at least 5 feet and hit the wall.) LOLOL
Since starting to use the bathmate, however, (along with manual stretching) it's become somewhat of a problem for me. I think it has to do with the fact that you simply require so much more blood to make it 100% erect. back in the day I could go from flacid to 100% boner just only thinking about a girl i liked or thought was hot. These days I can barely get to 100% erection while jerking off in the shower. And maintaining that erection is impossible without porn playing nearby on my laptop.
Im back. I'm putting myself through the AA program. No more excuses.
STEP2: Then I started seriously reading Aaron Sleazy and considering his advice on building social cirles and doing warm approaches. This made me almost completely stop cold approaching for the past 11days or so.
STEP3: My FB "broke up" with me after we had fucked twice, and 2 girls who I thought would arrange dates with me are not responding to my txt. So, right now I have 0 pussy prospects.
STEP4: I have no hobbies where I meet girls and don't really intend to do that because I need to do stuff at home like contribute on different online forums and practise my music and try to make that my career, because I have no real "career" or "mission" or direction in my life, and that's making me feel empty inside and probably contributes to my on-and-off depression and erectile dysfunction when I'm fucking a girl and I'm not on top.
My dream was to build a career as a composer and a musician doing many different types of music and playing the guitar and keyboard, but what stopped me was laziness and living in an apartment that's way too small to set up my home studio. I've been wanting to move for 1 year but fear that I won't find an apartment because there's too many people looking for one in my city so I haven't even tried to find one. INSANITY, I KNOW.
"Without a conscious life purpose a man is totally lost, drifting, adapting to events rather than creating events. Without knowing his life purpose a man lives a weakened, impotent existence, perhaps eventually becoming even sexually impotent, or prone to mechanical and disinterested sex".
- The Way of the Superior Man, David Deida
STEP5: After reading Personalpowermeditation forums I've understood the link between my mood and how much girls like/are interested in me. This can be proven by reading "Tramadol journals" a guy's experience using a mood-elevating pain killer that makes girls super interested in him. It makes total sense that because I often feel like a wounded person deep inside, basically no girls wanna be with me because they feel aversion to my fucked-up state of mind, flattened affect and detachment to people/socializing hiding below the surface of my personality that is a result of massive social rejection and failure to get my needs met and succeed in gaining status/validation from guys and girls over the 26 years of my lifetime.
Therefore, I must stay off (cold) approaching women and suffering more social rejection until I fix my life. This is going to take tremendous effort and is much more than just "knowing what to say" or "screening more chicks". I need to gain a source of validation in life that is NOT WOMEN, because Illuminatus says we must all get our validation from somewhere.
STEP6: I feel like I've failed with women because I have to go chasing them on the street like a hungry dog that doesn't get fed and I can't build a social circle, I can't develop real, deep friendships with men, and I need to withdraw from society with all its fucked-up values like working 8h a day. If I did that I'd have no energy or time to pursue any of my hobbies, interests, projects or women. If I don't cold approach every day, I might not talk to people for days and days. I basically see 1 group of friends 1-2 times a week, and other days I'm alone if I'm not with women. I feel disdain for women and their two-faced lies and superficiality. And I hope some girls would just give me validation and make me feel good about my ability to attract women...
I could say that I'm basically a "secret schizoid":
"These people may present themselves with an interactive, engaging personality style which contradicts the timidity, reluctance, or avoidance of the external world and interpersonal relationships. Secret schizoids also present themselves as interested, socially available, and participate in interacting in the eyes of the observer, while at the same time, the secret schizoid is is apart, emotionally withdrawn, and sequestered in a safe place in his or her own internal world".
"Schizoid personality disorder (SPD) is a personality disorder characterized by a lack of interest in social relationships, a tendency towards a solitary lifestyle, secretiveness, emotional coldness, and apathy. Affected individuals may also demonstrate a simultaneous rich, elaborate, and exclusively internal fantasy world"
BTW, I don't want to view myself as a victim, and I haven't given up! I feel happy when I challenge my fears like when I did the AA drills, got my first lay, went on a couple dates etc. I exercise 3-4 times a week, I meditate 1-2 times for 20mins every day, I eat a pretty healthy diet with vegetables, I get plenty of omega-3 from 2 tablespoons of fish oil, Vitamin-D @ 5000IU per day, I try to socialize more, I sleep 8h and I sometimes wake up once during the night. Doctors haven't found anything physically wrong with me: they just want to treat my depression with SSRIs, which are a dangerous drug that I will never take, because I've read all about the negative sides online from real users.
You're one of my inspirations here on this forum. You've worked harder than anybody in overcoming your SA and AA. You trust yourself and keep going. That's what I admire about you. I know that facing my fears makes me happier, and I do feel happy when I'm getting somewhere with women. When I'm not, I tend to start doubting myself, but I'm glad to have the support of guys like you and Chris.
If social freedom really is like cocaine, then maybe I haven't really experienced it yet, because for me talking to women is ok fun, but not euphoric unless I'm taking Phenibut.
I live in a shared apartment with 2 guys, and I hate it because I have to argue with them sometimes, and there's a lack of privacy.
Rather than being socially retarded and get laid, I want to be socially competent and get laid.
Your story is hardcore because you couldn't sleep for 2 months. I guess that's what built all that do-or-die motivation inside you. I don't suffer that much. My suffering is mild, but spread over years and years. I don't think it's manly to be willing to DIE for women or to get women. I think men should have greater causes in life, and women shouldl follow as a by-product of a mans' meaningful and socially competent journey in life.
The GoodLookingLoser.com forum offers visitors the ability to exchange information and thoughts. Nothing contained within GoodLookingLoser.com forum is the advice, opinion or otherwise the view of any host, owner, server or other provider of services to GoodLookingLoser.com or of Goodlookingloser.com itself. Nothing stated shall be construed to serve as a replacement for competent advice from professionals. Visitors are to make their own independent inquiries before acting on any information contained within the website forum.
I didn't think the "Get Hung" guide would have girls eyeing my bulge. It did.
I didn't think that your exercise and diet advice would have girls checking me out. It did.
I DEFINITELY didn't think that your hair-loss prevention would fix my hairline. Not in a billion years. It mother fucking did. You saved me a crazy amount of time, a ton of money, unnecessary pain, and destroyed my #1 source of anxiety. DESTROYED IT.
Kratom is next!
To anyone reading this, follow through, read this material, APPLY this material, and enjoy life.