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Sup ya'll. This post is half introduction, half asking for looks/style advice.
I'm 27 years old and only have two lays under my belt, and the last one was over a year ago. I've historically battled with psychological issues (low self-esteem, insecurity, sexual shame from religious upbringing, etc.). However, recently I've been starting to build a very strong positive psychological feedback loop; I'm on a confidence-building streak. I have no doubt that I am about to start getting laid pretty soon; I can feel it.
Recently started cold approaching. I started with "one approach a day" for a whole month following advice from Andy's website, and now I do mass-approaching on the weekends -- 7 girls each day Saturday and Sunday. I'm getting faster with this (did 7 in 1.25 hrs last time) so I want to start doing 10+ a day.
Anyway, I want to know how much room there is for looks improvement for me as I continue to get better and better at cold approaching. I consider myself an “above-average” looking dude, and I get a decent amount of numbers from girls (so far 18 numbers in 81 approaches), but almost all the numbers are flakes, and I've only gotten three dates. I know my sample size is still small though.
Some things I'm assuming might need improved:
- More muscle
- I think I have some fat to lose, to make my abs and jawline really "pop". I'm sub-15% BF though, which ain't bad.
- Not sure if most girls like longer hair on guys but I've experimented with a lot of different hairstyles and this seems to suit me and my personality the best (last pic with the longer hair is most recent).
- Edgier style? Recently I've been wearing a leather jacket and a bandana (I actually ride motorcycles lol), which I think has helped with this.
- Get tan. I think I look way better when I'm tan.
Also, if any of the pics stand out as being good Tinder pics, let me know. The professional-looking photos were taken by a girl I met via cold approach, lmao. She wanted to practice her photography skills, and I got good pics out of it.
Also, realistically, do I even need to do much work on my looks? Or is the main reason I’m not getting laid just my lack of talking to tons of women? I’ve been going out to bars at night more recently and have been noticing some interest from girls but I have pretty shitty killer instinct/assertiveness/aggressiveness, which I have a feeling may actually be more of a bottleneck than my looks. With my looks, do I have a lot of potential to get laid a lot? With hot girls?
Thanks for any feedback. Browsing this forum has been a fantastic resource, so thanks to all you guys.
Definitely cut your hair into something tight and stylish. Longer hair just doesn't look that good on 99.99% of guys.
And yea, you'd look better with just a little bit more muscle and an edgier style. You could do with some accessories, eg watches, rings, piercings. And a tattoo if you're open to it.
Clothes should be upgraded too. Start checking out popular male models on instagram, Dude75's log where he gives some good tips, and/or start shopping at Zara and buy clothes that fit your frame.
None of those pics would really pop on Tinder. Maybe the last one, you look cool and it could be a final closeup/authenticity selfie. But the other ones should be replaced with you looking better and doing cooler stuff, and you shouldn't have more than one selfie.
Keep approaching and slowly work on your looks. If you get in the habit of doing something to improve your looks/style a couple times per week, in just 2-3 months you'll look way better.
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