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I have a serious problem with being unable to approach and it's really frustrating me. I feel like I am running out of time in my late 20s to meet girls this way, and perhaps it can only be solved by something more drastic like CBT therapy or anti-anxiety drugs.
I've been reading 'game' material in some form or another for 10 years, from the age of 17-27. Up until age 27 however, I only did ONE approach, in a club, where I got savagely blown out. That's right - ONE approach after reading hundreds of hours worth of material, of imagining what I would say and do hundreds of times.
My issue is that when I see a girl I want to try with, I feel an invisible wall or barrier preventing me from doing it, and I cannot differentiate whether this is a normal, healthy response to the possibility of rejection (my brain shielding me from pain) or whether I just have an anxiety disorder. The thought of approaching a woman in a nightclub makes me physically seize up and get stuck like I'm glued to the floor.
I have a very low opinion of my facial looks, which means I am constantly quietly thinking about whether the girl deems my looks to be 'up to par'. Even with 50 lays from Tinder under my belt and 5+ drinks and MDMA in my system (as was the case last night) I could not start a single conversation with a woman, no matter how she looked, at the age of 27... it's utterly pathetic and I cannot stand living like this any longer.
Rationally, I know that not every girl will like my looks. I am a unique 'type' with a small face and quite asymmetrical, but even so I know logically that I should still TRY, but I physically cannot do it.
This leads me to believe I have a serious underlying problem that's stopping me putting this stuff into action. I'm sure for most guys it is not like this, and perhaps I am 'wired' differently in the brain to most people.
Surely approaching is not meant to feel this difficult, like it's a life or death situation. It's just talking to attractive women, but my brain perceives it as a major threat to my life.
I wonder if anyone had the same experience and was able to change themselves and overcome this total inability to be a normal healthy male and approach / chase women in real life? Any advice would be appreciated because I don't want 2020 to be the same situation.
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How to overcome fear / timidity - CBT?
01 Jan 2020 19:26 #325115
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