TOPIC: Rousseau's log, random stuff.

September 18th
31/36

4 approaches today and 1 number so far. Another black girl.

I feel great again today. I got patches and nicorette gum the other day. Im serious about quitting smoking this time. Im never going to have a cigarette again. No excuses.

Im excited for work. I wrote 2 orders last night, and im hoping for 3 today. I would really like to end the week with 10 orders, so i can pull in 300$. I could use the money.

Ive got a good date tonight with that busty vietnamese girl. Im pretty certain that ill have her amazing body underneath me tonight, we'll see though.

Ive been talking to girls that ive approached before lately. I feel like theres no reason that i cant make friends with some of these girls. Theres no reason to just ignore them afterwards. Im comfortable enough with myself lately, where i i feel like i can be comfortable with the things that i say and do, rather than being kind of ashamed of who i am.

Its been almost 2 weeks since ive tagged a new girl so i know ill be getting laid again soon.

What a dumb bitch. I know you set me up you stupid bitch. She fucking lied. She said she had to leave for work, and she had her fucking boy pick her up from tim hortons while i was there. Fucking lying bitch. Im not stupid you dumb trashy cunt. Unbelievable.

She wanted to walk to tim hortons, and she set up so that when we got there her "friend from high school" just magically pulls up, and picks her up and shes like "oh im gonna catch a ride with my friend, is that ok?". She was texting this fucking guy the entire time and had her pick her up. Stupid bitch. These fucking women man. Theyre unbelievable in their disrespect.

Im not gonna dignify that bitch with my anger. I wouldnt dare text her, lipping her off. I wouldnt fucking dare. I know they do it for the attention and the drama. If i texted that bitch, she would get off on the attention and the drama. Fuck you bitch.

I cant go home with the night ending like this. I have to go out to the bar or something. Im fucking livid right now.

Edit: I was super pissed before. I feel better now though. I don't want to carry that anger and bitterness with me when I go out to make sales tomorrow, or when I'm approaching girls. When my black girl comes over tomorrow, I'm going to get super drunk with her and fuck the shit out of her. That will definitely make me feel better. Having another cute girl naked in your bed is very therapeutic.

I have to be honest though, I really don't trust women at all. I assume most girls are lying to me. I always keep them at arms reach, just because i know how calculating and deceptive they can be. The fear of being vulnerable is probably cowardly, but a part of me is just so fucking mad. I really think pimp shit has a lot of truth in regards to women. These women can be ruthless. I resent how women are portrayed in our culture. We present them as if they are perfect and like they don't do bad things. It's like a shit test almost. In order to get what I want from women and life, I literally have to take a fucking beating, and it sucks.

I love the beating though. It makes me a better man.

Damn wtf happened? You think she purposely set up the date so you can see her getting picked up by her friend and make you jealous...?

Don't let 1 dumb broad bring you down, just next her and move on

I don't want to talk about it.

Basically, I got punked by this girl.

That's why you have to be fucking ruthless at this shit. These girls don't give a fuck.

Go after what you want, and GET IT.

If you're not going to pimp it, don't even bother with these girls. You have to be icy.

All I can do is keep going, like usual.

Yeah I mean some of the chicks I've approached have become my friends. You can do whatever you want, ignore them if you don't have anything to say to them, talk to them if you do. About Ms. Bitch - it's really her loss so no use even getting pissed off over it. I kinda feel pity for girls like that, they can't have a very happy life.

31/36

12 approaches and 5 numbers

After i make lunch, im gonna hit the gym, and approach some girls afterwards.

I think black girl is bailing on me, because she hasnt texted back yet. If thats the case, i have a couple more chicks to ask to hang out tonight, and if that falls through, ill go to the bar and work on night game.

Im still thinking about what happened last night, and feeling pretty pissed. I wish i wouldve said something. I thought maybe i was over thinking it at the time, but honestly its better to snap out and be wrong then look like a bitch.

Im gonna hit a couple malls today and get as many approaches as possible.

So the black girl texted me back, and ya lol. I'm pretty sure she's bailing. I said "can you be here by 7?" and she's like "where's here?".

Even though we already established where we were chilling. Whenever a girl acts like a dumb bitch, it means that she changed her mind and now she's going to bail on you.

Now its raining. Great.

TylerRSD is right. You really cant depend on women for your hapiness. If you do, you'll be miserable. How can I be happy to invite these girls into my life? I wanna be excited to hang out with these girls, but when i get excited they let me down. Its hard to reconcile.

Im just gonna go to the mall, and do my absolute best to pull an SDL. Then ill go out tonight.

Some day im going to look back on all the bullshit that women put me through and im gonna fuckin laugh lol. Im a fucking pimp.

What a bizarre day. Turns out black chick is coming over to fuck me

LOL.

I literally just kicked her out of my house. She told me how she accepted 2'000$ to have a relationship with this poor guy. I was fucking disgusted by this.I fucked her brains out. I got so fucking drunk. I'm disgusted by this behavior. I'm fucking disgusted by it. I feel sorry for these men. I feel for sorry because they've been fed this been lie. I was once a loser. I was once a beta, who would do this sort of thing. When she told me this, I didn't even feel like "haha, I used to be one of these guys and now I'm not". I felt incredibly bad for these men. I feel bad for the lies that they have been told.

I feel bad for them. It sucks. To be a blue bill man fucking sucks. It sucks having people grind your fucking face into the fucking dirt. I'm glad I kicked that bitch out of my house.

I know I'm bitter.

September 20th
31/36

I approached 1 girl today.

I don't care that much that I kicked that girl out of my house. I'll get another one.

I'm not going to do anything like that again though. I can't judge women for what they do. At least she told me the truth. The pain of being a loser in my past bubbled to the surface last night when she told me that. Frankly, I'm probably not going to drink with these girls when they come over. They never even drink the shit that I buy for them, I end up drinking all of it. Ive kept my promise where i only drink with girls, but alcohol still takes its toll on my relationships. I think im better off to only drink on dates.

This morning, I sent that other bitch a video of a girl riding my cock. Why? Because fuck her, that's why.

I'm going to hit the gym today, and do some approaches again.

I sobered up this morning, and i realized how unbelievably childish i was last night.

Lesson learned though. Im not going to beat myself up over it.

Ive got a date tonight with another black girl. Lol. Damn, black girls are all about my shit lately.

I just looked this bitch up on facebook, and it turns out she is friends with the girl i kicked out last night lol. I guess thats what i get for behaving like that. Never again, that was real stupid of me.

Every number i got yesterday flaked out on me lol.

Man, i feel so stupid today.

I gotta get out of this house.

I shouldnt have sent that video either. Man, i really fucked up this weekend.

Wow, i havent felt this shitty before in awhile. Im hungover and guilty. Im never drinking to get drunk ever again. No exceptions

I thought about going to the mall, but I literally felt like I was going to puke so I came home after the gym.

I feel like my swagger has just disappeared. I know it will come back though. I think I might end september without any cold approach lays. I had a couple close calls but thats it.

I decided that when i get ahold of the black girl, im going to meet her somewhere and bring her a flower. Shes really a cool girl, and I cant have our relationship end like that.

Im feeling a lot of self doubt again, but i know that it will pass because it always does. Tomorrow is a new day and it could be my best day in awhile. You never know in life. Anything can happen.

If i was smart, i would do some reading and french homework. That would make me feel a lot better.

I didnt smoke any cigarettes today so thats great. The patch really works wonders.

I had a decent work out today despite my brutal hangover. I feel like i could probaby rep 170lbs 11-12 times on a good day.

I didnt go on a date with the other chick. I really dont feel like it, and shes not that hot anyway.

I can't wait to go to bed and wake up early tomorrow. I need to start my week off great tomorrow. I'm gonna bust out some massive pimp shit. I'm going to bang like 2 chicks in the next 10 days. I'm mad at myself for slipping back a little bit. I'm going to make it up to myself by having an awesome, productive, pussy-filled week.

I think i might stop inviting girls for drinks. Ive been doing it since may, and it hasnt done anything for my dates. I was getting laid just as much when i just took girls on coffee dates

September 21st
31/36

Ive approached 8 super hot women today. I got one number from a super hot latina. Fuck she was fine. I didnt open with youre sexy unfortunately. I have trouble going from 0 to 100. I will get better with time. Instead of sexy, i said "really hot". I asked for a hug and she said thats random andand weird, so i doubt the number is solid.

I feel a lot better this morning. I'm going to hit the gym and do a bunch of approaches.

Its funny. Im worried about being judged because i approach women, and i tell more than one girl that theyre attractive, meanwhile these girls have sugar daddies and shit. They get paid to fuck married men in exchange for him to buy them Ipads and shit.

If i get a girl pregnant its 100% my responsibility to take care of her and the child. What a fucking joke. Why not get a sugar daddy for that too bitch? I refuse to be shamed by anybody in society for who i am.

Man, im getting way more ballsy on the approach. Im kinda glad i got drunk on the weekend. I was approaching girls super confidently and it showed me that the guys theyre often with are just their orbiters, and it showed me how intense you can be about this shit.

One girl i approached today was a 9 iraqi girl and she purred like a cat when i talked to her.

I just got another number from what most guys would say is a 9. I give her an 8 though because of her lack of big boobies.

Man the game is fucking wonderful. Yeaterday i was miserable, and now today im back on top of it like saturday never happened.

I just got another number from a hot ass girl. A Super hot mixed girl.

Goddamn i love these girls. I feel like they're making me a great man. I feel like my bitterness and negativity gets diminished a little more with each day, because I'm forced to confront these emotions when I deal with brutal girls.

Ive got two dates lined up for tomorrow. One girl is one that i approached way back, on september 1st and the other is the hot latina from the morning.

The other two numbers i got today were bunk numbers, but thats completely ok becaus of the other girls. Its funny how abundance maks you not give a shit. If i wasnt spinning so many plates i would be bothered. I really want a hot curvy latina. Ive only banged 2 latinas (i think) and they were Both 6's. I feel like im really close to banging a really hot girl soon. Im getting way more bold on the approach. Lately ive been straight up stopping these girls on campus as they walk me, completely shameless about it.

Today i approached a girl that i always wanted to talk to. I first seen her a couple years ago, but ive pussied out nearly every single time. Im gonna make a list of the hot girls that ive obsessed over that i need to approach

- alyda (done) (im going to approach her again because IDGAF)
- super hot asian gym girl 9/10
- Rebecca (hot indian, probably graduated)
- Tanned skinny white girl with bangin ass
- hot alternative brunette

To be bitter is garbage. I want to be a person who is all about love and understanding. When i look back on my rants, its so bad to read. I sound pretty meek.

I have pretty bad insomnia right now. It's 4:00am and Im still not sleeping.

keep it up rousseau! i've been reading your posts everyday. everyone goes through the ups and downs. i'm getting back into it. we are in it for the long run!

Don't doubt yourself mayne. From my perspective you're doing EPIC!

September 22nd

31/36

5 approaches and 1 number from another black girl.

I just had a date with the girl that i approached on the 1st of september and we made out super hard and she was even rubbing my cock pretty passionately.

Im never going to see her again though. I know how these girls are. You could make out super hard and be close to fucking, and its still unlikely that you'll see her again.

I need to have a game plan for everydate.. Ive blown a lot of chances for first date lays due to bad logistics and lack of a place to take them to have sex.

I feel like I easily couldve taken this girl behind one of the houses on residence and fucked her brains out, but i kissed her on campus away from any good places to fuck. Fuck.

Im still gonna text her to see if she wants to hang out. Thats what i did for my last lay. I didnt think i was going to hear from her again either.

Ive got another date tonight. Im going to get a few more numbers tonight and then im going to hit the gym after the date.

The date with the hot bubbly latina went well. My dates are getting retardedly smooth, for real. Im really surprised im not fuckjng more of these girls. I should be having sex with every girl I go on a date with.

I just scheduled another date with the bubbly latina for friday night at 7:00. I guess i wont be working then. Ill work saturday or something instead. She might bail though. We'll see.

Im going to ask the hot asian I made out witb hard to hang out again soon to. I cant believe how sexual she was. It was really surprising.

Man, i really want to have sex with that Latina.

Im approaching my 100th date soon. Im pretty sick of dates to be honest. I want my game to be taken to the next level. Im still not screening these girls clearly, because im getting a fuckload of sexless dates like usual.

Ive noticed that meeting them in a bar is pretty much useless as well. Meeting for a drink does nothing for your date to lay conversion. If a girl is DTF, she is DTF and she doesnt give a fuck where youre meeting.

September 23rd
31/36

Approached 7 so far and got 3 numbers

I managed to get up early today for a change. I meal prepped and went to the bank.

I cant wait to hit some girls up today.

I got a number from a really HOT busty indian girl. Goddamn her boobs were so big and round. Fuck, i love these girls so much.

I got another number from a big titted sri lankian girl. I persisted and made sure I got her number.

I also approached one other girl thats on my list. She told me she really loved my confidence and she thinks im very attractive but she has a BF.

Girls to approach
- alyda (done, will approach again cuz Idgaf)
- super hot asian gym girl
- rebecca probably graduated
- (done) skinny tanned white girl (done)
- hot alternative brunette
- Lillian again

Im probably gonna hit the mall and approach a few more for the fuck of it. Then ill go home and read before work

I approached a really sexy indian girl who shook her ass very nicely when she walked. She seemed very creeped out, but thats ok.

I got another number from a busty latina. My standards went up and I just realized it. All the girls im approaching and getting numbers from are much hotter.

I honestly can't wait to fuck my first dime piece. Its gonna be so sick.

All 3 numbers I got today were flop. Pretty trippy when that happens. I dont over anaylze though. That just means the numbers I get tomorrow will be solid.

Im still a mediocre salesman at work. All the other guys are making 3 sales or more per night, and im only making 1-2 a night or only 1.

The reason why I dont make sales is because im not aggressive enough when im trying to get payment. I really need to push every interaction to the absolute limit.

Im promising myself tonight, that tomorrow night I push every interaction with customers to the absolute limit, and I dont give up so easily.

September 24th
31/36

7 pproaches 2 numbers

Wow, i really slept in today.

Im gonna do my best to approach and hit the gym before class.

I tried to get an old date from July to hang out with me again. She gave me a total bullshit excuse about helping her friend move lol. I havent heard that in awhile.

Its funny, because i havent heard that excuse sice i first started this shit. That excuse actually brought up a lot of old feelings of rejection. Pain bodies are kinda funny. Why cant we just let things go?

Im feeling like a creepy loser today. A lot of feelings of self-doubt and the usual bullshit.
Its all bullshit. Its literally garbage. In 2 hours, or 3 days i could feel like the biggest pimp in the world and that will become my truth that i believe. Rejection and "the game" force me to confront that im not the best, and that i need to improve more and that i need to find my blindspots.

Its all for the purpose of development and progress. Im trying to love the cycle of ups and downs, but its hard to.

I just approached a really hot girl with a great body and big tits.

I could get a number or 2 today. I just gotta capitalize on the opportunities that present themselves. No pussying out when i see a
hot girl.

I feel pretty deflated so i didnt approach a coiple girls that i seen. Im probably gonna hit the gym in a few minutes.

Haha, i just got a number from a hot girl. I persisted though so i doubt its solid. She daid she has a boyfriend.

I talked to jacqueline after i finished the gym. Shes the girl i made out with on tuesday in the morning. We talked and she hardly made eye contact with me. I asked her to hang out and she just said not this weekend.

Im probably gonna ask her again next week

I just got another number from an asian girl on the bus. Im kinda off my game today. I feel weird when talking to these girls.

I notice that when I tell these girls that they're sexy, I get A LOT of flakey numbers. Probably about 50% of the numbers I get are non-responders, but the numbers I do get are more likely to hang out with me. This is great because I'm super sick and tired of hanging out with prudish non-DTF girls who waste my time.

Awesome, ive got 2 dates scheduled for tomorrow. I would really love to have some great new pussy soon.

I used to sit in my room on the weekends and get completely fucked up by myself. I would get really drunk by myself and feel so miserable. I would avoid anybody that i knew.

I used to go home a lot to hang out with old friends. I would smoke meth with my friend in his garage.

I really hated myself. I never got any girls. I never did anything good. I felt miserable everyday. I would think about suicide often lol. Shit, im starting to see the humor in it. I almost want to start laughing as i write this, because its so dramatic and funny.

I have a hard time relating to people who I perceive to be as lesser value than me. I think this is kind of a tragedy. Things have been so great lately that im having a hard time remembering where i come from. I dont think about the past fhat much anymore. I only think about the very recent past.

Im scared to make friends with guys who are beneath me, because im not that confident yet. I feel like their "value" will lower mine. I know this is stupid but i cant help how i feel.

The right thing for me to do is to go out with those guys who asked me to hang out. But i cant drink when im out with them. I want being a non-drinker to be a part of my identity. I know I wont regret it if I chill with them. I just cant drink.

I want to be a good person, for real. I dont wanna spread hate. I feel like the best version of myself is confident, charismatic, funny, outspoken, intelligent, empathetic, honest, reliable and honest. I want to be that guy 100% of the
time.

I was mindful at one point today. I caught myself thinking bitter thoughts. I was thinking negatively about women. It was pathetic.

Im reading Gorilla Mindset right now, and im taking it seriously. Im going to start recording my thoughts and words when im negative to see what i sound like when im bitter.