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Ok so long story cut short I am now spending approximately 12 hours a day approaching girls at least - by day, by evening, night and dawn. I usually get up around 11am, and go to bed around 4am. I've been hitting the clubs pretty much every day.
My problem is I get shot down almost 100% of the time by girls especially in the dance floor where I always get the same reaction - girls (especially those in groups) physically push me away, tell me to get lost or fuck off when i dance too close, give me filthy looks or move away. I am 100% sure I don't smell, at least 2 GLLs who get laid have verified my looks and style are at above average (see my style thread to judge for yourself). I will admit my dancing skills are awful - should I go to nightclub style dance classes to remedy this?
Ideally someone who has experience in this - i.e. always getting shot down but finding a way to make it work will clue me in here. And yes I know GLL says clubs are unproductive for picking up girls but from my own observations guys pick up girls there all the time.
Well I am logging every day every approach i make - typically about 15 during the day (streets, malls) and 20+ (actually pretty much every girl I can find in any club I am in) at the clubs not including bars. To be honest as many girls as I physically can!
Idan wrote: My problem is I get shot down almost 100% of the time by girls especially in the dance floor where I always get the same reaction - girls (especially those in groups) physically push me away, tell me to get lost or fuck off when i dance too close, give me filthy looks or move away. I
Can´t figure out why many guys think approaching on the dance floor is a good idea. For me it is like sneaking your way to your target. Playing it safe but at the end you get rejected big time.
There are guys in the scene who promote their so called "dancefloor game" which I believe is pure BS.
Dancefloor is for dancing. Approach women while they are standing around and waiting for the alphas to approach them.
Believe me on this. Girls that are dancing just want to have fun. The horny ones don´t show high energy in the club.
never believe guys that brag about this and that. They all lie and are all full of S***
It's been a long time since I was in the club/rave scene, but I used to hit that scene pretty hard for about 5 years. I think Chris' article about club 'game' is very accurate from my observations. fforward is right that in most cases, girls go to clubs in groups to enjoy dancing and music and get attention from guys but rarely to hook up.
The only club lays I ever got were from girls I met right before going to the club (group meets up, I get introduced to new people, we club together) and/or girls who just wanted me as soon as they saw me and approached me or made it very obvious they wanted me to approach. I got plenty of club makeouts from approaching but never sealed the deal that way, and eventually gave up on it as a productive path to getting laid. Too much work, too expensive, too difficult to do while still working a job or school.
I don't think I ever observed any guys consistently slaying it in clubs, but I did know about 2 girls who went for ONS all the time with the hottest guys they could find and would fuck a new guy 1-2 times per night.
Idan, if you are determined to get lays through nightclub you definitely need to fix something in your strategy but with your success rate so far and your lack of sexual experience I suggest getting some sexual confidence and more experience through approaches that have a higher chance of success such as daygame, online, social circle parties etc., get some fuck buddies established so that you are having regular sex and come back to this with a more confident mentality.
Guys can really burn themselves out on cold approach when they are going at it as hard as you are and not getting the results they want. 12hrs a day is crazy; I admire your commitment and drive but going at it like this while getting no pussy can be damaging for you long-term.
Disclaimer: I live in Europe (Spain) so maybe this is not accurate for you if you live in USA.
Right now I only do night game in clubs with fairly good results (I go out 2-3 times/week). In the last 6 months I've fucked 6 girls from cold approaching in the night scene, not a great number because of fucked up logistics, but got from like 40-50 cold approaches 30 available girls.
In my experience, the thing in bar/clubs is NOT spamming like a madman cold approach, you have limited time so you should use it efficiently. You should choose the girls you approach because there are TONS of them that are probably not available (girls dancing like crazy on the dance floor or elsewhere, girls in a closed circle paying attention only to their friends...). You can approach those but majority of the time you won't find them very cooperative. This is how I operate when I arrive to a bar/club:
1. Check the place to see where the good chicks are.
2. Position myself where I can make eye contact with one of those. If I get it IMMEDIATELY approach her. When I do this girls are available like 90% of the time.
3. If despite being on her sight radius I don't get eye contact I will approach the ones that I judge that will be available: not fully dancing, provocative clothes, only with a friend, a girl alone (this is very rare), looking constantly around the club, fixing a lot her hair... Those signs are not so "definitive" like could be eye contact (with a bigger margin of error), but when I follow those I am usually on the right track.
4. EVERY time I go out, following this I will get AT LEAST one available girl, making 1-4 approaches per night.
PS: You should have your looks in a good place because night game is more than anything about standing out of the crowd. If you look like a fucking mofo you will shine more than ever because you will be surrounded by tons of average Joe.
I'm from Denmark so the culture might be different.
I'm doing pretty well in clubs and just by reading you post I'll have to say you're doing several things wrong.
I want to point out especially 2 things:
1. Approaching on the dancefloor
Not a good place to approach. Period. Especially approaching groups by grinding girls from behind is just an overall horrible idea. When girls are dancing in groups they usually just want to have fun together and they usually stand in circles, making it impossible to do a proper approach.
2. Approacing every girl in a bar/club
Just don't. I would recommend to approach a max of 3-4 and you should try to do it while the other girls you're hitting on can't see you. Preferable on different floors.
Last advice I want to give you is to check out Grim Reaper's guide for club creeping (Grim Reaper is probably one of the biggest GLL experts on the subject). He wrote it up because Boy Toy asked him to:
@OP How are your logistics? You should be 5 minutes or less walking distance from point A (Where you meet the girl) to point B (A bed). If you have these kinds of logistics your odds skyrocket. If you don't have these kinds of logistics, you're wasting your time! ALWAYS have an endgame (penis in vagina).
Your problem is most likely that your energy level is too low. This is one of the most common technical problems that guys have when they are approaching. If there is a group of girls dancing and yelling and having fun and you come in with really low energy, they're gonna tell you to get lost because you're ruining their buzz and not adding to their sense of fun.
Girls are always looking to improve their night by adding more fun to it. High energy is especially important on the dance floor. Girls will pay attention to and defer to the person with the highest energy. This is one of the old pickup rules that actually works. You should always approach with an energy level that is at, or slightly higher than the group your are approaching. This needs to be taken to the extreme when you are on the dance floor. Don't just do a little two step shuffle and expect the girls to give you a good reaction when you approach. Spin the girls. Yell "WOOO HOOO!" Shake your ass in front of them. Be excited.
Go crazy with your energy levels on the dance floor and let me know how it goes.
Ethan x speaks the truth. I don't do the club scene anymore but am places where that damn Wobble song is played. And I'm right there with the girls, most of the time I'm the only guy since I spent a measly 16 minutes to actually learn the moves while the bashful betas are phoning it in from the sidelines.
I'm going out for one thing - to get dat pussay. Only 18-26 year old pussay too
Hi Mr. Q - yeah I've seen those articles. December 2013/January 2014 improving my style was my level 1 priority - just as creeping is my priority now. You can see my journey from my style thread and the general consensus was that I had reached the peak where any more time spent on style would yield diminishing returns. Whether I reached that magic '7' above average is another matter...
I believe with the 2.5" insoles and big kurt geiger boots make me 5'7 to 5'10 just about. It has taken a lot of trial and error and fanying about with cut up foam pads and still I walk with quite a bit of discomfort. I may need to do a complete revamp at one point and try and get my height to '5'11/6 feet
I will defo have a look at the advice you gave me - I have made notes in my diary which I shall read over before I head out tonight...
Here are a collection of selfies from the last week or so
From what I have seen and common sense I would have to agree with everything you just said
If there is one reason I may give the clubs a miss - it is because of this. Girls who dance aren't usually looking for a fuck. It also DRAINS me like crazy in a way daygame or online does not. What you are saying about burning out is extremely significant as I have been following DANGER and PLAY quite a lot and honestly - I think I am very similar to Mike Cernovich in that I am an introvert. I can get overstimulated (like now) where I end up feeling like a zombie - burned out and unable to motivate myself to do anything. So I try to counter that by taking sundays off and chilling out. I've been consistently approaching girls in Poland all of the last 2 weeks but only have a few facebooks and numbers but no dates or lays yet. I need to be sure that my fundamentals are the highest they can be so I am not limiting myself... I don't think lack of confidence is a problem per se - having that one lay followed bu a year long sexual relationship did wonders for that.
I creep in both the United Kingdom and Poland (especially the latter) so I imagine it is similar to Spain perhaps more than the USA.
I am making notes on what you have said - it sounds like sound advice to me - very logical. I find that as far as looks are concerned I have put in TREMENDOUS effort (it was my number 1 priority before doing all this approaching/trying to get laid) but I still cannot be sure that I am above average and am fairly certain I do not stand out. I am also not willing to do tattoos and crazy shit like that. Increasing my height by ridiculous amounts and wearing great clothes is as far as I am able to push it.
That guide looks excellent!!! This Grim Reaper sounds awesome (as does Boytoy even though we must remember he is 6'5 and at the complete apex of male looks)
Dam that steak looks juicy! Yeah I usually have this nailed as I always rent apartments in decent places.
Damn this makes a lot of sense! My energy is usually high - I treat dancing almost like a cardio session in fact but not for prolonged periods of time. When certain "potions" are taken it gets MUCH better. Its funny because in almost every incident I have been blown out harshly - it makes me feel that ultimately I am doing something very creepy - something in my body language or face or lack of dance skills...
Ah ok - what is the name of the dance moves I should try and learn - are there special club dancing classes you can find anywhere?
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