TOPIC: Not advice-just my story and take on things

Since I can't sleep anyways and was browsing on the GLL forum I figured I might as well just write a bit about this stuff because I cat help but relate to most guys out there dealing with 'depression'. Maybe it helps I dont know, I just realize now that i did a lot of things that can probably be applied by anyone to get out of a depression

A year ago
About a year ago when I found out that my (ex) girlfriend fucked four or five other guys within a week after we broke up and also had sex with my best friend at the time I basically got very close to rock bottom mentally speaking.
I was 21, had no hope for a good future, felt very lonely and felt I hadn't found 'my place'. I didn't click with most of my classmates, I didnt like the city I lived in, I didn't like the people, I didn't like the girls. All I really cared about was hitting the gym and doing my thing. I was extremely depressed. All I did was working out, going to college, work, and watch series.
Somehow I just wasnt feeling myself anymore. Im naturally pretty gifted with people I'd say, extroverted, confident and someone who likes to take risks and discover new things. Ambitious. I just lost that 'guy'. I didn't knew how to get out of it. And to make matters worse, I was broke as fuck.

Right now
Though my life (n my eyes) is far from perfect, its pretty obvious to anyone why knows me that the pendulum shifted completely to the otherside bringing out the best of me. Yes we all have our mini 'ups and down's, but generally speaking, Im pretty happy with how Im living my life right now (and I contribute a lot of that to Chris).
Right now Im at a point where I have a really hot fuckbuddy, and hooked up with a couple other really hot chicks. Im seeing super hot girl right now and like her (but obvously well see where it goes). I have no AA anymore and social anxiety is gone for 95%, maybe 99% I dont know.
I'm at the top of my class (business and entrepreneurship), and actually really like my study. I just started setting up my own business and Ive done some investments that turned out pretty well. Physically speaking, though this was never an issue for me, Im in the best shape Ive ever been (196lbs, 12%), working out 5 times a week, jogging twice a week. I read about 4-5books a month, have a cool job and a social circle with friends thats so massive it just gives me headaches at times 'managing' all the friendships so to say. People always call me to chill, I hardly ever call them and i think thats a good sign. Lot of people find me inspiring and that in turn motivates me even more.
Best part is that I just burst with energy, optimism, and ambition. I truly believe this is just the beginning.

What happened
Basically I talked a lot with my dad about how I was feeling at the time and at one point we went to the beach where I asked him how I could ever have hope and faith after dissapointment and failure, again. He said something that for some reason really stayed with me"you just need to have faith and hope that there is more for you out there despite all the hurdles youll inevitably come across. It was an eye opening moment for me.

I found out that in that particularly dark year in my life I never had set any real goals. I figured my life needed some direction so I wrote down what I wanted, put it in this japanese wooden wish box and immediately felt relief. Life  is like jumping in a river. If you don't know where to look for, where to climb out on the shore, you'll just go where the river takes you and as you know-it always leads to a waterfall and fucking terror. Instead you need direction so you know when and where to climb on the shore before the river takes you to deep valleys.

Another thing that really helped me was writing down everything I didnt like about me and my life on the left side of a page, and writing down how I wanted to my life to look like on the other side. I went through lots of introspection which payed off tenfold later on. After that I wrote down everything I was scared of, and one of these things, was talking to chicks.

I always felt deep down I needed to be more proactive in my life, especially when it came to chicks but I never did anything. I would always overanalyze stuff, wanting to make it perfect (theoretically) before actually doing it. Funny enough, at some point I came across this book called 'fuck-it' which was a bestseller at the time I think. Now, you can buy it but you dont need to, I didnt either. The whole message is contained in that title: just say FUCK IT more. And so I did.

I started screening chicks eventhough it was a near death experience at first-fuck it
I started dumping all the garbage people in my life-fuck it
I went to places I never went to before-fuck it
I did impulsive stuff more-fuck it
I worked out even more even though most people said I was crazy to give up beer for working out-fuck it
I could go on and on but the point is, I TOOK ACTION. I still do.

My mindset has changed, I used to want to do everything perfect and plan ahead. Now I just do stuff and figure out my next step on the go based on what happens next.

I took action. I did that consistently. Doing that allowed me to gain momentum. Gaining momentum give me confidence. Confidence led to bold actions. Bold actions led to results. Results led to empowerment.


My biggest tips for dealing with depression
I'm not the biggest player out there, I still got a lot to learn. Im not the richest, funniest, most intelligent or most succesful guy out there. I know I can and will get there though. I also know that Im happier that Ive ever been before. Here are the biggest tips I can give you If your dealing with depression

-Write down your biggest fears-then confront them head on and do this for the rest of your life
-Put yourself in difficult situations so you can learn from them
-Take action and do it consistently
-Write down your goals and tweak your life so that youll reach them asap
-Watch motivational videos-cheesy as they might sound to you
-Read, listen and interaction with people that inspire you-whether its by reading a book, listening a tape or talking on the forum here
-Sleep less-do more. All succesful people sleep far less than normal people. Make it a habit of sleeping 6hours tops
-Start  bodybuilding. Hitting the gym and doing this stuff seriously will teach you a lot about life and youll look n feel better
-Say FUCK IT more
-Dump all the garbage people
-Go to new places
-Listen to music that gets you pumped more
-Step out of your comfort zone as much as you can-then abandon your comfort zone entirely
-Realize that you cant hit it off with everyone
-Dare to dream bigger

Thats it. I could write a shitload more about this stuff but i already feel that its a long post. Point is this, you need to
take action, dream bigger, and fuck everyone who's keeping you small. Will the real you please stand up. Thats what I said, will the real Z please stand up. And I did.

Some of my favorite motivational videos:
HOW BAD DO YOU WANT IT PT.II

The Best Motivation Video

Motivational - Will Smith Gives Advice on Success

Heavy topic I know. but important nonetheless

excellent write up bro it helped a lot

this is awesome.. maybe I'll post it on the main blog (if you don't mind)

Zuberi- you are allowed to give advice that you feel comfortable with, ive taught you about 80% of everything I know related to most of the topics here.. which is more than anyone on the site.. including Scotty (he teaches me stuff more often)

I took action. I did that consistently. Doing that allowed me to gain momentum. Gaining momentum give me confidence. Confidence led to bold actions. Bold actions led to results. Results led to empowerment.

Hey Zuberi, this is an awesome to hear, I love to see a guy turn his life around. The statistics on self help are somewhere around only 10% of people actually putting techniques into practice. In my opinion that is because they aren't able to go through the transitional phase which you have to take on faith, and which is really painful, a lot has been written through the ages and a good term for it is called the dark night of the soul. The good thing is once that is done, the hardest part is out of the way. The quote above I think is the most important part of that write up, everything changes once that pendulum switches to positive momentum, all that shit you wanted starts becoming attainable

Sure bro you can do a write up I don't mind

Thing is, I think I actually know a lot about dealing with this stuff. Thats partially related to the fact that I probably read 200-300books concerning self improvement alone. point is I never did anything with it-up untill a year ago or so and I think Ive implemented a lot of that stuff at a deeper level. Everyone can do this, you just need to know its possibel which is where I come in and why I wanted to post this.

I took action. I did that consistently. Doing that allowed me to gain momentum. Gaining momentum give me confidence. Confidence led to bold actions. Bold actions led to results. Results led to empowerment.

Hey Zuberi, this is an awesome to hear, I love to see a guy turn his life around. The statistics on self help are somewhere around only 10% of people actually putting techniques into practice. In my opinion that is because they aren't able to go through the transitional phase which you have to take on faith, and which is really painful, a lot has been written through the ages and a good term for it is called the dark night of the soul. The good thing is once that is done, the hardest part is out of the way. The quote above I think is the most important part of that write up, everything changes once that pendulum switches to positive momentum, all that shit you wanted starts becoming attainable

Yea having a dark night of the soul is crucial. I actually had many of those nights where I just couldnt sleep and my mind would wander.

getting the pendulum to move is indeed the way to go and after that you're off-things will only get better

Sure bro you can do a write up I don't mind

Thing is, I think I actually know a lot about dealing with this stuff. Thats partially related to the fact that I probably read 200-300books concerning self improvement alone. point is I never did anything with it-up untill a year ago or so and I think Ive implemented a lot of that stuff at a deeper level. Everyone can do this, you just need to know its possibel which is where I come in and why I wanted to post this.

yup for sure (i know, haha).. you've made sense of your life/game.. you know how I know?
you are getting results

great post man, I book thing sounds interesting and helpful, going to do that since ive already done some of the others you listed

Sure bro you can do a write up I don't mind

Thing is, I think I actually know a lot about dealing with this stuff. Thats partially related to the fact that I probably read 200-300books concerning self improvement alone. point is I never did anything with it-up untill a year ago or so and I think Ive implemented a lot of that stuff at a deeper level. Everyone can do this, you just need to know its possibel which is where I come in and why I wanted to post this.

yup for sure (i know, haha).. you've made sense of your life/game.. you know how I know?
you are getting results

haha I guess so..Ive def. restored the balance in life my so to say

Thanks for taking the time to write this up, Zuberi. I can identify with mostly everything you went through, it's actually really inspiring to read about a guy with so many similarities who actually turned shit around and became a success story.

Simply taking action is damn right! Many steps you've taken like dumping garbage people, working out, a lot of other things on your  list are stuff I've been working on and it definitely is 100% true in that the positive effects are there if you grab your balls and make the effort. Some things I still have to learn but have been tough, like being impulsive as you say. Another one is being bold, when I look back at times when I did have some success in life, it was always the result of me stepping out of my shell and being bold. It was usually impulsive and it's difficult to just turn the boldness on when I want.

I think it's great advice to write things down and look at shit objectively, instead of trying to make sense of it all through a clouded mind. Did you find that doing that changed your perspective on your entire situation? For me, doing that made me realize that my life ins't as bad as I thought once I listed the good/bad of it and could sit back and look at the overall picture. More positives than negatives, and most of the negatives were repairable if I just pulled my head out of my ass and started working on it.

Anyways, congrats man and thanks again for the great post. Reading quality threads like this and all the GLL material has been really motivational for me. It's really given me an extra boost in the past little while.

For me, doing that made me realize that my life ins't as bad as I thought once I listed the good/bad of it and could sit back and look at the overall picture. More positives than negatives, and most of the negatives were repairable if I just pulled my head out of my ass and started working on it.

this is great, super important.

Thanks for taking the time to write this up, Zuberi. I can identify with mostly everything you went through, it's actually really inspiring to read about a guy with so many similarities who actually turned shit around and became a success story.

Simply taking action is damn right! Many steps you've taken like dumping garbage people, working out, a lot of other things on your  list are stuff I've been working on and it definitely is 100% true in that the positive effects are there if you grab your balls and make the effort. Some things I still have to learn but have been tough, like being impulsive as you say. Another one is being bold, when I look back at times when I did have some success in life, it was always the result of me stepping out of my shell and being bold. It was usually impulsive and it's difficult to just turn the boldness on when I want.

I think it's great advice to write things down and look at shit objectively, instead of trying to make sense of it all through a clouded mind. Did you find that doing that changed your perspective on your entire situation? For me, doing that made me realize that my life ins't as bad as I thought once I listed the good/bad of it and could sit back and look at the overall picture. More positives than negatives, and most of the negatives were repairable if I just pulled my head out of my ass and started working on it.

Anyways, congrats man and thanks again for the great post. Reading quality threads like this and all the GLL material has been really motivational for me. It's really given me an extra boost in the past little while.

Good to hear it helps bro. About being bold: just say fuck it, do it, and go with the confidence and momentum you get from that. its so simple yet it works like a charm

Did you find that doing that changed your perspective on your entire situation?

honestly, no. Not in the way that you'd expect. It only showed how much I was disgusted of my life and the way I was living it. I actually think thats a good thing though bcuz after that it really hit me that I drastically needed to start doing shit. You're def. right about getting an objective look that way, the way I see it, once you write down things that your occupying ur mind with, the better youll unfderstand them and as for goals in life-the closer your to actually realizing them.

cheesy as it all sounds, I noticed that once I started writing down things Id be more relaxed-the chaos in my head was organized on paper and by doing so I also made my goals and dreams more tangible because I finally got a clear picture of what I wanted by doing so. Cant recommend it enough tbh