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I wanted write a post to discuss my overall thoughts on this journey.
I should note that before I started the program, I didn’t have any problems hitting on girls after just one or two drinks. I went through the program because I wanted to really cut down on drinking/going out.
This has been an extremely rewarding and difficult experience. Completing some of the drills really revealed a lot of my insecurities.
Thoughts to those starting the program:
1. Make sure you don’t have much on your plate. I work a full time corporate job. However, when I wasn’t working, working out, or hitting on girls at bars I was doing drills and going on dates. The AA program was the only thing I was really thinking about. It’s a long program and requires an extreme amount of dedication.
2. DO NOT alter/change the drills... especially at the beginning stages.(first 4 weeks) The reason for this is that the program does not give you room to LIE to yourself. If you end up changing the drills... it’s going to because you are avoiding facing something that you need to face. If your fears are already taken care of.... you won’t have any problem doing the drill as written.
3. Try to look as good as you can when out doing drills.... The idea (I think) begind doing the drills is to prove to your brain (weirdly worded) that it’s OK, to speak to women in public... your brain learns that when you see that MOST OF THE TIME... girls reactions are FINE... However, girls reactions are not very good if you look like shit. Getting a bunch of bad reactions will make it harder to do the drills.
Stages of beating AA: What the program does to your brain. Your brain must recognize;
1. It’s OK to strike up conversation with random girls (time, directions)
2. It’s OK to look silly in front of girls (goofy drills. ABCs)
3. It’s ok to immediately show sexual interest in girls (week 6 and beyond)
Each one of these stages must be dealt with and beat... if they aren’t... drills must be repeated until your brain recognizes how OK it is to do the aforementioned activities.
The hardest part for me was doing the goofier drills (ABCs especially)... fuck that drill.
I think a lot of my progress had a lot to do with the fact that I already had social freedom after a few drinks... Idk if I would have progressed really had I not already been able to hit on girls (easily) at bars. However, it seems like a lot of guys on the forum went through the program unable to do that and have had success.
Beating approach anxiety is one of the most rewarding things you can do for yourself... as you do the program... you start to see your personality change into a more confident and well adjusted man.
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I didn't think the "Get Hung" guide would have girls eyeing my bulge. It did.
I didn't think that your exercise and diet advice would have girls checking me out. It did.
I DEFINITELY didn't think that your hair-loss prevention would fix my hairline. Not in a billion years. It mother fucking did. You saved me a crazy amount of time, a ton of money, unnecessary pain, and destroyed my #1 source of anxiety. DESTROYED IT.
Kratom is next!
To anyone reading this, follow through, read this material, APPLY this material, and enjoy life.