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Did 10 today at a mall close to my place. In about 25 minutes, that's pretty good I think. Afterwards, I had to go on a non-date with that neighbor who I friend-approached a while back.
I think at this point I have a pretty solid idea of what I'm afraid to do and what I'm not.
The act of approaching girls just to say "you're cute" and walk by is a breeze. I did it to every girl I saw who was cute. only two that I missed were one, who was on the phone, and another, who was walking right next to her bf. I was pretty proud of myself for getting in there considering my weeklong break (sorry BIB, you told me specifically not to do that.)
I DID do it on 2-3 girls who were with their moms, lol they didn't care.
Anyway, then I did it to two girls pretty close to one another. It dawned on me that the first girl might have seen me go and do it to the second girl. Immediately my heart dropped into my stomach and I became super nervous. I did not want to risk being reported for sketchy behavior.
So that was like night and day to me. The fear is of doing it to too many girls at once.
I challenged myself also to smile nicely at a security guard as I walked by. THAT was hard.
I keep only being able to give 20-25 minute chunks to this because of other commitments
God. Just a few months ago, I would have considered this "date" an overwhelming success. But now I can say:
The neighbor girl who I friend-approached a few weeks ago seemed really eager to meet up with me even after telling me she had a bf. I figured what the hell, chris says that girls change their minds easily about this sort of thing and "think they have a boyfriend for a week"
So I went out to grab dinner and drinks. It was pretty hard. I had to really fight for each piece of hand or arm touching, and she wouldn't give me anything back. I was afraid to be too aggressive because she lives RIGHT next to me.
So even if I wasn't friendzoned before, I am now. I guess it goes to show, when you let a girl decide how the date is gonna go, or if you approach indirectly... expect nothing. Also I see why social circle game is so hard, it's like there's something on the line.
but she obviously still thinks I'm cool to hang out with. What the hell, she's pretty hot, it's good to have hot girls as just friends. social proof and all that.
The stopping them part is a bit harder, but soon I was able to. I went at lunch to a target and chickened out on a girl, then went back to work to think about it for four hours.
Then I went to a walmart and did 6 more reps.
Went to a mall afterwards to do more, but for some reason I ran out of steam. Idk. maybe I'm being too selective, but it's hard to find 40 girls after 5pm on a weeknight. I'm trying to only do it on girls where I think, "my god she is hot I want her right now."
Lots of pleasant reactions, only one real bad one. Some girls even said I was cute too.
After I ducked out of the mall rep-less, I went to a park at the beach and realized I had been cooped up inside for too long. There were no hot girls, so I just walked up and down the beach having warm conversations with everyone I saw. That was nice.
Didn't get out until late today, that was my b. But god damn! I felt SO good today, and I feel great about how I did even though it was only 6 reps.
I went to explore my city today, since I just moved up here and have no idea where anything is. I found out that there are two malls and 2 metropolitan campuses, one of the malls was closed temporarily, so I went to the other one after wandering the streets trying to find it. I will hit the campuses tomorrow.
In addition to telling girls they are cute, I just sort of went around talking to all sorts of people. It was like the beach on thursday where I talked to everyone I saw. I just was beaming positivity and spreading joy and happiness by being nice to everyone! And people liked it! It feels so, so good. I love this.
In the mall, I asked a security guard a question and then told her she was cute. I was not into her, but she was kinda pretty regardless. She spent the next 20 minutes walking around with me making small talk like she wanted to turn it into a date. She gave ME a high five and was super into me, asking me what I was doing later, I could have taken her anywhere I wanted.
This is an odd reversal of fate considering my recent interactions with security guards.
I did not actually want to do anything with her though so I politely excused myself by getting some food. There were more girls at the mall, but I didn't want her to see me hit on anyone else, so I only did like 2 more girls and left. My fear of being seen doing this multiple times is REALLY getting in my way.
but yeah, if anyone is lurking out there having any doubts that this shit works, or that normal people do it every now and then... there you go.
Another lesson: state is so, so important. I think I was able to do so well today because of a tiny thing that happened on the way. A guy was acting crazy in his car, throwing weird hand signals out the window. I looked around, and in another car, there was a lady looking just as confused as me. So I shrugged at her in a big goofy way, she just laughed and laughed. Then I played some awesome music for the rest of the drive and was just really feeling it.
Anyway, hopefully the campuses have more hot girls at them, since half the reason why I am progressing so slow is because it's hard to find enough girls. It's like BIB said, towards the end of the program he just had no patience for venues other than colleges.
I fucking love how I can talk to people now, and just be good to everyone I meet. life is getting sweeter all the time, boys
today I discovered a great place to do drills in the future. it was one of the metropolitan campuses. I will be going back there this week for sure to do the rest. Finally, a place where I'm only going to be limited by my own skill and not how many cuties I can physically find. *knock on wood*
It was getting dark so I had to go home, and I wasted a good amount of time at this random festival that I found that, while fun, was more full of baby boomers than hot girls. Next time I go I should be able to get at least double the reps in, since I won't be wasting time.
Much more comfortable asking girls to stop and tell them theyre cute. All positive responses today, so that's nice.
a funny thing happened at the festival though, there were one or two cute girls there, but all were with friends and families. normally I can tell girls they're cute right in front of their parents, but today I couldn't. Festival was pretty densely packed, but small, so I felt like I could be seen I guess? Didn't do one rep while I was there, even went back later after I got my state up and still couldn't do it.
I dunno. when I hopped over to the campus, I was right as rain again and could do drills on the first girl I saw. Go figure.
Keep at it George. You are such a fighter dude, it actually gives me confidence. I read about how they kicked you out of the mall, twice, and you keep going and it galvinises me at night when I read this stuff. Keep scratching at it.
Just try do them in front of one another, then act cheeky. If she sees you, look at her and smile, she will do it back. Act like you are naughty and just being silly. That is how I got through the sheer numbers on these days. I am similar to you, in that I hate doing drills in front of girls that I just did them on.
Also, you do know it is harder to say you are cute to girls you really dont find cute...at least for me it is. Try it.
Hey hey people, I didn't want to post again until I got
Day 38 (you're cute)
completely done at last.
Earlier this week I did another 8 reps, and just today I finished it off and did 3 more, getting to day 39 on the way home from work.
@healthyadda I know what you mean when you said that this can help you deal with stresses at work. both tuesday and today (yesterday I had something else I had to do) I came home just SEETHING from work, and talking to girls made me feel soo much better.
An interesting thing happened on tuesday that never would have happened before. By freak accident, when I was at panera's getting lunch, I recognized one of my tinder matches standing in line. over text, she seemed into me, but kind of a timewaster, and probably would have never met me. But I walked right up to her and introduced myself and she remembered me! we turned it into an instadate right there. We had a bit of chemistry, I might be meeting her again tonight, but she seems pretty wishy washy EVEN after I met her in person. I'm just gonna go back out and do drills instead, IDGAF.
Another thing I've learned: being awkward doesn't matter. It's like chris says. Embrace the awkward silences or stiltedness of your conversation with a girl. As long as you stay calm, interested and conveying that sexual presence/touching her, you're fine.
I love that stopping a girl to tell her she's cute is now pretty easy. there's still weird exception cases where I can't do it (too many people around, afraid of security due to talking to too many people in one location) But on a given day if I'm out and about, and see a hottie, I'm not scared at all. the only thing that keeps me from going for it is the fact that I'm not on week seven yet. Man, those 30 approaches are gonna be well worth the wait.
Started strong, but as soon as I start to no longer "get in there", I start to lose.
Doesn't matter, had fun and got some reps done.
I'm feeling the anti-aa start to emerge which is good. Like, "there's a hot girl, I MUST go talk to her or else!"
Girl flaked as expected. Good thing I went to do my own stuff this evening.
Edit: i love coming home after doing drills, it's like damn, I really did something today. I am working it back into my routine now and the day feels wrong if I don't get some AA drills in. Soon I should be able to put up more numbers per day. All is well! (super knock on wood)
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