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Approach Anxiety
Approach Anxiety Program
Dashedhopes' Approach Anxiety Log

TOPIC: Dashedhopes' Approach Anxiety Log

Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 13 Jan 2015 23:39 #179527

Day 35 - Are you mad bro?

This day took me a couple days to do it not because it was hard but because it was so cold. It was almost -30 outside so I didn't feel like making myself freeze that day. I got 8 done and did the rest today. They all went pretty easy but it took me a little longer than the other ones this week to start just because of how much weirder it was than just complimenting a girl. This was kind of like fucking with them but I tried to even stay sincere when I said are you mad bro. I did this in a troll type of way but some of the approaches I could tell they thought I was actually asking if they were mad. It was pretty funny.

I got a couple of responses where people wouldn't give me the time of day but whatever just gotta let it not affect me.

I listened to tomorrow's audio from Chris and it struck home when he was talking about the nice guy thing and getting it out of my system. I say sorry soooo much. I am Canadian so it's sort of in my blood. However, this isn't an excuse, I am a nice guy and it sucks. Throughout this program though my mindset has changed drastically, I do say sorry less and I try to speak my mind regardless of what other people think of my opinions or what I say. I am really liking the new me that this program is creating.

Anyways. Tomorrow seems super easy. It's going to be fun acting sincere and I can't wait for week 6. I think I am going to improve a lot during this week.

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Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 15 Jan 2015 18:33 #179957

Nice work bro, hoping to follow you in nailing week 5 but need to sort out these repeated days.

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Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 03 Feb 2015 20:01 #184059

Thanks man!

Just getting back into drills. I just stopped for no reason and It was dumb. I did 10 approaches of the pass by and say "you're cute" drill.

Going to finish tomorrow hopefully.

I still haven't done the bar drills. I am going to a different city to do these because it's next to impossible to find a bar that has no one I know that fucking ask me why I'm there and who I'm with. It says don't go with anyone but I always end up seeing people I know.. *sigh

I'll have to setup a weekend in Toronto or Kitchener/Waterloo to do all the ones I missed. I don't think it's too much of a setback. I have 10x better logistics if I would cold approach at the mall 2 minutes from my house.

However I realize why the bar drills are still important. I'll get em done.

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Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 05 Feb 2015 19:01 #184550

So today and yesterday I could only do a couple of approaches until I got that anxiety that prohibits me from going any further urgghh.. Soon there will be a day where I get it back and I am able to do 20 in a row with no problem.

One girl today I tried to stop her by saying, "Hey stop for a second" and she gave me a dirty look and I yelled that she was cute in the middle of the university center haha. It was pretty funny and she was actually cute too (Fucking pmsers). After that I was being a bitch and I couldn't do anymore. It sucked. I am also done the first set of 20 but If I can't do like 10-15 all in one guy I am just going to keep re-trying it.

It's really important to just keep going with drills every day even if you just high-five 5 girls on your way to class. You need to keep AA in your mind until you are done. I wish I learned this a couple months ago but I am going to just always do some sort of approach to some girl to keep going out of my comfort zone.

That would be the advice I would give to any newbies reading this. Stay in the game.

I also need to stop opening GLL near other people that I just meet. Only a few people that are closer to me know about what I do but I am only going to open it at home so I can avoid un-wanted questions. I've had to just call it a game around this one guy and he thinks it's some mysterious thing that I do and won't tell him. He's just a little beta kid that is cool but I don't want to show him any of this stuff. He's good for motivation to do school work.

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Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 05 Feb 2015 23:41 #184604

dashedhopes wrote: So today and yesterday I could only do a couple of approaches until I got that anxiety that prohibits me from going any further urgghh.. Soon there will be a day where I get it back and I am able to do 20 in a row with no problem.

One girl today I tried to stop her by saying, "Hey stop for a second" and she gave me a dirty look and I yelled that she was cute in the middle of the university center haha. It was pretty funny and she was actually cute too (Fucking pmsers). After that I was being a bitch and I couldn't do anymore. It sucked. I am also done the first set of 20 but If I can't do like 10-15 all in one guy I am just going to keep re-trying it.

It's really important to just keep going with drills every day even if you just high-five 5 girls on your way to class. You need to keep AA in your mind until you are done. I wish I learned this a couple months ago but I am going to just always do some sort of approach to some girl to keep going out of my comfort zone.

That would be the advice I would give to any newbies reading this. Stay in the game.

I also need to stop opening GLL near other people that I just meet. Only a few people that are closer to me know about what I do but I am only going to open it at home so I can avoid un-wanted questions. I've had to just call it a game around this one guy and he thinks it's some mysterious thing that I do and won't tell him. He's just a little beta kid that is cool but I don't want to show him any of this stuff. He's good for motivation to do school work.


From what I can see we're at a very similar point in the program bro.

I'd deload. Make a list of 5-7 drills from week 1-5 that you didn't get a fucking awesome time on and redo them. Do some challenges and shit.

I can't speak for you but I know I'm not ready to get to the serious shit yet.
The following user(s) said Thank You: Dashedhopes

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Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 06 Feb 2015 01:05 #184619

I did that!

Haha. It's a good idea though cause I might do it again. On the reflection day I went out and did every challenge which was really really fun.

I did the abc one where you just keep going with the alphabet until she leaves and she stayed for like 7 rounds of me singing the abc LOL. She was really cute too which is funny cause If I asked her out after she'd prolly give me her number.

But yea. I think this is a good idea to do often when I am not feeling up to doing the current drills.

Getting shit from 40 girls is really emotionally draining at first so I need to just not care and get them done.

Thanks man, good luck on yours too.

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Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 10 Feb 2015 02:48 #185565

I still haven't conquered the, "You're cute drill" yet. It's pretty difficult for me but the important thing is that I have been going out and saying that I am going to do it. As long as I go out and actually have the intention to do the drill then I'll eventually be able to do it.

I don't go out normally on Saturday or Sunday because I'll be at work or my parent's house. I do it all throughout the week though.

Today was pretty brutal, I didn't call one girl cute. I just gave them high fives to try and break the tension. The big things in my head restricting me from doing the drill is when other people are around. This has always been hard for me. In between classes on campus there are like hundreds of girls walking by me but those times make it harder for me. I really need to get over this. I end up just doing my drills during classes when there will be 95% less people.

I'm gonna try again tomorrow morning and see how it goes.

Anyway, wish me luck.

p.s. Check out this thread that I made. Some people are complaining about the quality of this forum right now and I think that this idea would cater to older more experienced members. Whether I am in it or not doesn't matter to me, I just think it's a great idea and could pertain to any small groups of guys that like each other here in the forum.
The following user(s) said Thank You: SickIndividual

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Last edit: by Dashedhopes. Reason: Addition

Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 11 Feb 2015 03:50 #185825

God damn.. Still can't get the courage to do this one. I only had this much anxiety when I did the arnold drill.

I am going to set aside a lot more time to do this one and if I gotta keep walking around campus in the cold then so be it.

Will post again when I get this day fucking done.

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Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 11 Feb 2015 09:16 #185864

if its hard, try first to say a compliment very quickly while u pass by, with them not even looking at you. This could serve to break the tension. I mean saying it "at the last moment", walking towards them.
Its strange how we feel differently about drills, for me its harder to give an hi5 than a compliment. Maybe this proves that the problem are always and only in our head

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Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 11 Feb 2015 13:58 #185875

I 100% agree man. It's difficult. Sometimes I even say to myself it's only in my head yet I can't just force myself to say the things I want to a girl. I'll get it, I usually do. I just need to pass a threshold that is blocking me from really nailing out these ones because the should be just bang bang bang, done pretty quickly. I just need to stay consistent with attempting the drills every day and not letting up and I'll get it.

Thanks man!

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Tristan's Approach Anxiety Journal ! 12 Feb 2015 00:01 #186003

I did it... Finally!

Approach Anxiety Day 38
(Genuine but Skeptical)

I knew once I channeled my inner lose that I'd finally be able to do it. After reading a bunch of stuff in class on GLL forum I just said fuck this... I'm gonna do it. I went, and did them all and was convinced that I was back into these drills again.

Also, Chris posted the moderate challenge of getting a selfie with a girl and I did it within 10 minutes of him posting it LOL. I probably would've had a harder time of doing it if I hadn't literally just completed my drills but whatever, I did it ^_^.

There were no girls that gave me bad reactions so I think that is what helped me be consistent in finishing the drills. The last time I did like 3 reps in a row one girl wouldn't even stop for me, she just gave me a dirty look and kept walking. In my head I laughed and didn't think that it phased me, but deep down it did.

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