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Day 118: My social freedom was up and down after getting in there with the first girl I saw, I was a little nervous for a short while, but I was able to settle down. Remember to be more persistent, not every seemingly available girl will jump your bones after saying "you're sexy" A disinterested girl does not mean unavailable (girl on treadmill) A nervous girl does not mean unavailable (1st approach of the day) I have to claim that pussy to really know, I've learned this lesson before today, but now I have the courage to push my limits. I was able to pull a girl to my car, or at least promise her to drive her back home. She was from Ukraine, I don't think an American will get in a stranger's car unless she was dtf. Maybe she was available, whatever it was, I should've touched her more beyond the hand shake, I had all the opportunities in the world to touch her more between "hello" and the drive to her house.
I'm going to phase out of the approach logs real quick, I'm only doing this to get my feet wet. What I need to do now: Finnish strong and kill AA, get to sub 10% body fat (I'm at 15-20) then get good pics for tinder, follow through on my plans to moving out of my parents house.
Day 120: Made 2 approaches at the gym this evening. I will continuously make approaches apart of my lifestyle.
Didn't wake up until late afternoon today, so no go on day approaches, haven't had good sleep in about a week and I've had late night cravings for food/sugar; lifting should help though. Need to find the cheapest option for teeth whitening.
Day 50*122: Kept forgetting my lines today, the script felt unnatural but that's how its supposed to be; had plenty of those type of interactions so nothing new, wouldn't be amusing to a guy who isn't 4 months deep into the program. Good exposure therapy for the day.
Day 53 (Groups): I did good today but all I kept thinking was how much balls a guy needs to do this drill, a really humbling and rewarding experience. Yeah my AA is dead, and it seems like Week 8 is not coming back, can't believe I'm a few days away to the finnish line. I addressed pairs like they were one, and it was interesting how they handled themselves.
Day 54: Short and sweet, this drill is about as "In or Out" as it gets verbally. I should've recorded this earlier, but it just never occurred to me while writing my journal. All of our issues come to the surface; mine is anger associated with past bullying and unwarranted resentment. I bottled my anger up my whole life because I didn't have the courage to stand up for myself. My blood doesn't boil when I'm out doing drills, or approaching, but I've heard girls say "I don't look happy" My anger surfaces at random moments, mostly when I'm driving or laying in bed trying to sleep. The only way I'll overcome this is to get a life. I'm 50/50 on following through with Week 8. On one hand I would like to finish for a sense of accomplishment, but on the other hand I want to get a move on with my other objectives for the year; there's still 4 months left but I'm feeling like the clock is ticking.
Day 55: This drill took a while to finish, not a lot of talent walking around today. I did the first 25+ in 1 hour 30 minutes, took a break, then did the final 10 reps in 15 minutes. During the day chicks my age and younger react well to my advances, older chicks not so much; if I dressed professionally then maybe I can reverse that.
I'm still weighing my options but this might be the end of the program.
Day 56: I want to finish this program. I was thinking about past missed opportunities and told myself that I'm in no position to sell myself short and stop now, I'm so close anyways, and more exposure therapy is always good. With that being said, this week is going to be tough. The variety of predictable responses still applies for the most part, but I creeped out more girls today than in Weeks 6 and 7 combined, including one that initiated eye contact. There was almost no middle ground, I either got a few seconds or 10.
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I didn't think the "Get Hung" guide would have girls eyeing my bulge. It did.
I didn't think that your exercise and diet advice would have girls checking me out. It did.
I DEFINITELY didn't think that your hair-loss prevention would fix my hairline. Not in a billion years. It mother fucking did. You saved me a crazy amount of time, a ton of money, unnecessary pain, and destroyed my #1 source of anxiety. DESTROYED IT.
Kratom is next!
To anyone reading this, follow through, read this material, APPLY this material, and enjoy life.