Her Orgasm Is Also Her Responsibility
Thankfully, when I was inexperienced, I’ve never decided to blame myself if a girl couldn’t have an orgasm.
As I built more experience through the years, I realized FOR CERTAIN that if a girl couldn’t orgasm – that it wasn’t MY FAULT.
(so long as I didn’t prematurely lose my erection which Cialis prevents every.single.time)
Certainly there’s been times that my performance lacked for one reason or another (drugs/alcohol, lack of sleep, etc.) but I would still ALWAYS make the effort to get the lucky girl off either orally or simply with my left hand.
The girls that couldn’t climax from that – simply couldn’t have an orgasm that day.
Often, they couldn’t have orgasms at all.
Sometimes it was a random occurrence (just like guys get ED) when they were preoccupied, nervous or not feeling sexy.
But like I said – there were plenty of girls that simply didn’t know how to reach climax via intercourse (or at all).
We’ll get into why that is and give some suggestions for
But first I want to MAKE SURE, ONCE AND FOR ALL, that you guys
DO NOT blame yourself if a girl can’t get off.
Notice I said-
If a girl can’t get off.
I didn’t say-
If you can’t get a girl off.
It takes 2 to orgasm.
- You to provide the majority foreplay and stimulation.
- Her to mentally take herself from sensation, to pleasure, to ecstasy.
You can only judge how good you are in bed from the girls that are able have orgasms.
(it’s similar to sexual availability, not all girls are able at any given time)
- If you’ve gotten a girl off in the past whether via intercourse or otherwise – you can provide orgasms to the girls who are able to have them.
- If you can engage in adequate foreplay, enough to make her pussy wet and produce sensations once you are inside of her (whether by intercourse or other) – you can provide orgasms to the girls who are able to have them.
- If you have dick that 6″ or more in length and over 5″ in girth, slightly above the average penis size – you should have no worries that you have the equipment to provide orgasms to the girls who are able to have them.
- If you can keep your dick erect for about 2 or 3 minutes straight, you can provide orgasms to the girls who are able to have them.
(the girls that know their pussy the best will literally orgasm upon entrance of your penis, especially if it is thick)
It’s the inexperienced guys that particularly need to hear this.
A lot of guys really beat themselves up if some random girl isn’t satisfied after some random fuck.
A lot of guys in committed relationships blame themselves if their girl that can’t orgasm.
Even though they know full well they that have brought their girl to the brink – but she couldn’t translate it into an orgasm.
Ironically, the girls that don’t/can’t have orgasms USUALLY KNOW IT.
Rarely do the bring up this fact or take any responsibly for it.
The inexperienced/worried guy is made to feel like inadequate shit.
He begins to hallucinate about some well-hung stud in her past that had a Coke bottle for a dick, balls the size of jumbo eggs that sprayed genetically superior DNA everywhere that she had to clean up with brand name paper towels.
Not the case.
Probably not anyway.
start continue playing the “blame game,” I just want everyone out there (ladies and gentlemen) to know that it indeed-
Takes 2 to orgasm.
Girls That Can’t Orgasm, Don’t Masturbate
While I’m sure there some exceptions, the girls that can’t get off from intercourse, oral, etc. don’t masturbate very often or at all.
If they do masturbate, they don’t achieve orgasm frequently.
If they can’t themselves off, how in the world can you get them off?
Through the years, I have made it a habit to find out how often (and to what point) just about all my fuckbuddies touch themselves to.
I can’t remember a single time where a bed buddy told me that she couldn’t orgasm from my dick, tongue or hand – but yet she masturbated a lot.
Girls that don’t touch themselves to the point of orgasm, on at least a bi-weekly basis, often can’t get off with a partner.
The general trend is-
- Girls that orgasm, also masturbate.
- Girls that don’t or can’t orgasm, do not.
Some Basic Suggestions If She Can’t Get Off or She’s Inexperienced
Here are some suggestions, at the end of the day (or night), it’s on her to ‘pull the trigger’ and reach orgasm. You can only do so much.
This one is obvious, but it’s especially important if she’s inexperienced and nervous. Once you sleep with a lot of women, you’ll literally be able to tell how experienced they are or aren’t before you even take their clothes off. If you are hung, this is super important and probably that only downside to owning a large sexually-active penis.
It also a pretty good idea to engage in a significant amount of clothed foreplay (dry sex, I guess it’s called), make sure they are pretty wet before taking their clothes off. Inexperienced girls tend to be more comfortable when clothed, so it’s not a bad idea to get them wet before removing their clothes. I know this sounds very “high school” but some girls are very inexperienced and nervous – especially if they like you.
This might not be the one that most people “want” to see listed 2nd, but we’re here to tell you what works and not just give you crap theory that you’ll never be able to apply.
Just years ago, my friend Lexy couldn’t orgasm and now she has violent orgasms that literally leave her dizzy. If you hook up with her, it’s quite a show.
In the early stages she would take small amounts/doses of alcohol or certain compounds that made her relax and intensified the sensations. Before we knew it, she was cumming. It wasn’t long until she could do it on her own without drugs or alcohol.
Less Dirty Talk
This is a 180 from what all the inexperienced “sexperts” will tell you in their eBooks and DVD series.
They insist that “dirty talk” helps lead girls to orgasm and it can be a hugely effective catalyst to build sexual tension during foreplay or intercourse. While this may be true with experienced girls, in my experience (with more inexperienced girls than you’d think) – this is NOT THE CASE.
The dirty talk is distracting and prevents them being in the moment. Inexperienced girls are often nervous, worried about pain, worried they are doing an okay job and just caught up in the fact that “sex is really happening,” even if they aren’t virgins.
The last thing they need is for you to be yelling at them about how hard you are going to fuck them.
If you have a young, inexperienced girl in your bed, you are way better off playing “doctor” than pornstar.
Ask them, from time to time, “does this feel good?” “Do you want me to rub it slower or faster?” “Don’t worry, you’ll be safe with me I’m not going to go any faster than you can handle.” “You are doing a good job.”
Being on the same page with an inexperienced girl is important (if you give a shit about her experience, some guys don’t). Often that page is at the very beginning of the book.
Besides complimenting the girl on how
sexy beautiful she looks naked, save the dirty talk for your more experienced chicks.
Here are some suggestions for outside the bedroom-
Be Her Guru
It doesn’t matter how much sex you’ve had or haven’t had.
If you are more experienced than the girl, appear more experienced or she just generally looks up to you – you can be her sex guru because she is at the beginning stages while you have been getting yourself off for years to pornography and reading creepy websites like Good Looking Loser.
Tell her that you want to give her her first orgasm and it will be a group project (you and her) that you’ll work on until you succeed.
It will fun. No pressure.
I’ve done various forms of this type of thing with inexperienced girls and it’s really helped them relax.
They are inexperienced.
They know it.
You know it.
You are okay with it.
They will be okay with it.
This type of dynamic is pretty powerful and they see it as a huge opportunity to learn about their body, even if they aren’t fully onboard with having sex.
This type of thing sometimes requires a little amount of time reading stuff on the Internet together and watching videos.
Once they become pretty comfortable being naked around you, it’s usually not long until they are able to get off (and want you as a boyfriend).
Remember this saying-
“I’m proud of you.”
Repeat it often to her, even if she doesn’t climax.
If she is taking steps (see below) you should provide positive reinforcement.
Assign Homework & Bubble Baths (Masturbation)
Encourage the girl to masturbate when she is alone.
(inexperienced girls will generally be afraid to touch themselves in front of you)
If she’s never really done it show her the basic motions.
(grab her hand and rub her pussy in a circular motion until it’s wet, then put a finger inside of her and touch upward over and over)
Tell her EXACTLY what you want her to do.
This is good and where I encourage most guys to begin-
Require her to take bubble baths and not shower until she orgasms. Tell her to sit in the bath, with her legs up in the her, letting the hot water hit her pussy for 10 to 15 minutes. Tell her just to relax and think of nothing more than that the hot water between her legs. For beginners, this type of exercise really seems to build mind-pussy connection. If they don’t masturbate (or don’t know how to achieve orgasm) it is quite possible that they have never felt anything like this before.
Although the following advice is only insightful to 8th graders- I suggest that you have her read a mainstream/socially acceptable masturbation guide like this one.
Follow up with the girl to see that she has completed her homework and give her a sticker as a prize.
Since I’ve been asked-
I suggest that an inexperienced girl should avoid using toys or vibrators until get can get herself off manually.
But what if she won’t listen and won’t follow my advice?
You probably don’t have a girl with healthy attitudes toward her body or sex on your hands.
If she isn’t willing to get herself off while enjoying the privacy of her own home, you ain’t getting her off either.
“Screening” girls generally filters out these types instantly.
While even I like to believe that I can lead ANY GIRL from inexperience to orgasm over a couple weeks, the fact is- it’s not true.
Although it’s nice and quite rewarding to offer an inexperienced girl her first orgasm, it’s not your job nor your fault if
you are she is unsuccessful.
It takes TWO to orgasm.
I once had a girl come visit me in LA for an entire week and she wouldn’t get naked once. Believe me, I tried… I’m pretty good at this stuff.
Feminists will have a problem with this type of thinking, but most have never had an orgasm (that’s why they are feminists) so we really can’t take them seriously, as much as we’d like to.